Finding My Alpha {Book 1}

My entire life was a lie.

《Naomi's P.O.V》

His words kept playing in my head. Are we okay ? Ha? Okay? I'm devastated.

I wish this was all part of sick television show but no. I slept through the nights trying to wake up in hopes of realising it was all a bad dream.

But when i wake up...the first thing i see is Ray's eyes. Those blue eyes with gold specks. Looking into mine with pain. We sleep on the same bed. But we're alone.

It feels like everything is a routine i wake up go to school. Nod my head a few times. I still sit with Ray's friends.

Why? I don't know. Maybe they've become my friends too. But lately i feel like no one is my friend....

It feels like I've been backed into a corner with walls closing in on me. My entire life was a lie.

My parents.

My friends.

Ray.

They were all lies.

It's been weeks since i went crashing down. I haven't cried since then. Why should i? I don't cry. I am stronger than this. Than all of this. My life should go on Tv! Maybe then I'll get paid to go through this turmoil.

The girl who realises that her life was a lie. Many teen girls may jump at the chance of living my life. A werewolf boyfriend, sounds good. Doesn't it? But it's not always what it seems.

It hurts so hard to keep going on. To be stuck in this body and have no power over my circumstances. But we all have days where life beats us down harder than usual and we gulp down our pain and put on facades.

Today is a Tuesday. I woke up. My eyes starring straight at the celling. I looked to my right. The neon green of the alarm clock glaring back at me.

2.03 and I'm awake. As usual. I haven't been able to sleep. It's been hard. My eyes have bags and my hair is a mess.

I looked to my left. Ray lay still. Sleeping? No. I feel him turn and face me. I shut my eyes close, i don't want to see him, yet i can't move my body and turn away from him.

"Mi." His voice is horse and cracked.

I open my eyes and fall into his intense gaze. We say nothing more. It seems like our eyes have been doing all the talking.

His eyes are glossed and red in the corners. His nose a shade of red. I've been seeing this look alot now. Almost every night. His silent sobs. He's been crying. His eyes screaming at me to forgive him. That's why i wont look at them.

It hurts me too. But it's not that easy. The wall of trust we had built together came crashing down. He can see me too. My eyes dry. A contrast to his. And i see the worry in his eyes as he notices it. He's afraid that i may go insane because I'm not crying the pain away. I'm bottling it up.

He thinks i am over him. That he's not worth crying over. While here i am watching him crumble in front of me. But in reality it hurts so much. I'm so scared if i start to cry it'll never stop.

I lick my dry, chapped lips. His eyes dart to them, darkening ever so slightly. We haven't kissed at all after the last. It's been weeks but it feels like an eternity.

I sigh and turn. And i hear the sheets rustle behind me. I turn my head to see him facing the wall. Our backs facing each other. With room in between us.

That's when i decided. I can't do this anymore. I had a thought for quite some time now and it was time to put that plan into action. I didn't sleep the rest of the night. I faked being sick and stayed in the dorm. Ray didn't push me. He offered to take care of me but i brushed it off and said i still needed my space.

I saw the last bit of hope in eyes break as i chocked on my tears. All i have been asking for is space. Space from Ray, space from my father. Space from my mother, my friends. Space from the truth that i cannot accept.

After he left. I ate my breakfast and took a long shower and sat on the couch. I smiled in the most sadistic way i could. This little dorm has so many memories. So many emotions.

Finally i cried. I let my cries echo off the walls. I let it drown out all my sorrows. After i did that i decided that enough was enough. I can't stay here any longer. I made a few calls and i was ready.

They can't expect me to be "Oh my boyfriend is a werewolf so was my father who showed up after all these years. Lets be a happy family!" I can't do that.

I walked back into the room. And pulled out an old suitcase. I packed everything i had. And i took one of Ray's sweaters. I needed something of his.

I pulled out a sheet of paper. And opened the cap of my black pen. I folded up the paper after i was done and put it on the white coffee table.

I rolled out my suitcase and locked the door. And i strolled off. I had a plan but i wasn't sure if it would work. It has to work....its my only hope. With new found determination i started running.

They were werewolves. They can track me down. I won't let them. I ran to the bus stop and took the first bus that would get me to any train station.

After i reached the train station. I bought a ticket and boarded a train. I found a seat located at the back.

I had some money with me. The money i had earned last year while working. It's not much but it will do for now.

I leaned my head against the window. And the train started to move.

"Bye Ray." I whispered as i let a tear slip down my cheek.

*Insert reporter voice*

Oh no !!! What's going to happen now? Wait till my next update to find out what happens on Finding My Alpha (: