A Mistaken Wish (#Wattys2016)

Chapter 17- Baby Steps

"If you live to be a hundred, I want to live to be a hundred minus one day so I never have to live without you"- A.A Milne

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She

'I Did it...'

'OMG I eventually said it to him'

'Why does it feel like there is a roller-coaster ride going on in my stomach'

'what next'

I have no idea as to what do people do when they come in relation......I have always been a outside viewer of this place called 'love and relationship' and to be very honest I never visited that place without my guard up so practically I had no idea of what to do next..... I desperately needed help and when it came to help my Hemu helpline center was always in service. 24*7*365 always available to sort my shit out. So that's what I did...I grabbed my cell phone and called him and then told him all about what happened....then after speaking for about 30 min. continuously when I was over......he then told me that he was proud of me and then I asked him what to now.

'just be yourself' was all he said and just disconnected the call.

'really...!! Hemu' was all I could think. He was supposed to help not confuse me further.

'Aaagghh some friend he is.'

Being hoplessly clueless about what to expect next or what to do next, I just flipped off the switch of my bedside lamp and drifted of to sleep.

He

I woke up in morning. Still having the same thought as last night that was

'what next'

I have never even had an affair forget relationship....and now I'm clueless as to what to do next. I talked to Shubham about it. I told him that I want to be someone who is just perfect for my princess and I had just no idea what should I be doing and all he said was 'you don't have to be anything to love bro. All you need to do is just be yourself'.

'Really helpful....' was all I thought with a frown on my face.

Day went by and I met my princess again in evening. Not a thing has changed since the day I first saw her. She still had effect on me no one had. She was my refreshing breath which just made me forget everything burdening me.

After our classes got over I came out and saw her standing by her scooty waiting for her friend Shivi. I walked up to her. I had no clue what to say or do, all I knew was I needed to be with her so I went to her. I could sense her nervousness, I was nervous too but the moment I saw my princess a bit too nervous my nervousness was replaced by confidence. Confidence to be with her, confidence of making her mine and figuring out the way to it.

I walked up to her and said 'hi'

'hey' she replied in her angelic voice.

We just kept standing there for a while after that I was looking at her face and she was looking everywhere but me. Her nervousness could be easily seen It looked as if she wanted to say something but was hesitant. So I just told her very casually

'a penny for your thought', I wanted to know what was she thinking.

She didn't say anything. But i wanted to know what she was nervous about so I encouraged her saying.

"We will have to tell each other our thoughts if we want it to work. keeping back won't help and i promise to try my best to understand."

That seemed to have done the work because she then told me what exactly she put forward her feeling n a very pure and simple way. In a way that made me fall in love with her again.

She looked into my eyes and said,"Shiven I have no idea of what love is. I have never been in any kind of relationship. I don't want to hurt you but I don't know what to do or what to expect. Unlike my friends I never even had an affair because I never belived in it. I never came to know what it is, with you I want to try but I just know how. I don't want to be a disappointment to you, so you can still back off. I promise I will understand. I don't know and neither can I promise to be everything that you want me to be all I can promise you is that I will always stand by you and be true to you and this relation"

Saying that she just lowered her eyes and that's exactly when I knew that 'she was the one'. If there was also an ounce of doubt and nervousness in me just left and it was replaced by confidence and love. Now what Shubham said to me earlier was making sense. He was right I don't have to be anything all I need to do is be myself and be true to her. She was as clueless about all this as I was and if I have to give her anything then it is best to be myself, stand by her and love her with all my heart. I know what I had to do

I came closer to her and pulled her chin up so that she was looking at me when I was talking to her

"You are all I need. You don't have to be anything for me, you already are everything I want. I don't know anything about love either but I know that if you are with me we will find our way. You don't have to meet my expectations you are already beyond it. I love you for not what you could be I love you for what you already are. i know you don't love me right now but I promise to try my best to win your affections. All I need is for you to stand by me and as far as how to go ahead with this is relationship is concerned lets just take baby steps. Like we did today by telling each other what we feel. That's a good start. Rest we will figure out together ". I said with a confident smile

She looked into my eyes and then smiled and said "thank you and you are right we will figure it out together.'

It was the moment I know that it was a situation of blind leading another blind in a dark alley but I didn't mind because I know that we may stumble and fall but we will reach our end TOGETHER.

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Hi everyone i know i have been late at posting but i'm here now so lets just forget that and here is chapter 17 tell me if you like it.......and Merry Christmas to all my readers.