New Beginnings || l.h

•three•

// so this chapter will be short. I'm sorry

This is only explaining some things so you can understand more about what happened and how everyone left without a goodbye.

-

It's been a whole week since my first day here in Australia, and things have gone way different than what I was expecting.

I never had friends, and now I do. I've never gone to anyone else's house, which I have now.

I've also never really talked to people other than my dad and some family members in the past.

I never got close to people, and I still try not to, because of past experiences.

I used to have an older brother, Tyler, back when I still lived in my hometown.

When I was four, he was fourteen, Ten years older than me.

When he turned seventeen, he got into drugs.

He was arrested many times.

I was only seven at the time, so I didn't understand anything that was going on.

My dad would just tell me "Tyler's just going on a little vacation"

One day, he was sent to a rehabilitation back in my hometown, Salt Lake City, Utah.

A year after he was enrolled, my dad, who was unemployed, finally got a job.

While he was unemployed, the whole family struggled because of the lack of money, which led to lack of food and clothing.

It was great how my dad got the job, but ever since then we've been moving non stop since I was eight.

I am almost eighteen now, so ten years I've spent with no company. Just me and my dad.

Barely my dad and I. He was always doing some sort of work.

So, Years later, when I was about thirteen, with no contact from my brother, my dad got a call from the rehabilitation center, hoping they'd say he's been discharged.

I remember it like it was yesterday.

Flashback

"Ring ring!" My dad's phone rang loudly.

We were in the middle of eating dinner.

"It's the rehab center" he said. "I'm going to have to take this, honey."

I nod, and take another bite of my meal.

"Hello?" My dad said with a smile.

The voice on the other line was barely audible, so I had no idea what was going on.

My dads expression changed from smiles to sadness.

He frowned, tears threatened to fall down his face.

"Wh-what? H-how ...did...what?" He waits till the other person finished talking.

He fell to the floor, and cried out.

"Dad!" I gasped, tears ran down my face for seeing him like that.

He ended the call as I wrapped my arms around him.

"Dad what happened?"

"I-it's Tyler." He said once his crying calmed down. "He passed away from an overdose."

I gasped. There's no way this can be happening. I already lost my mother, not my brother.

"N-no! This isn't real!" I yelled, while I pinched myself.

"Don't hurt yourself" my dad calmly said.

The rest of the night, we sat in silence.

End of flashback

-

That was how I lost my brother, Tyler.

My family is just like a broken glass.

It started alright in the cabinet, but one bump can knock it from its perfect state, and it will smash into a million pieces.

Honestly, the only person I have left is me.

My dad constantly had business trips, so he was never really home for days, weeks, and sometimes even months.

When I turned sixteen, I ended up cooking my own meals, and not some simple shit you get in a box, cleaning, and making sure the bills were paid.

I can't remember the last time my family was in order.

It was when I was so young, I can't remember.

Back when my brother was in a good state, and my mom was free from cancer.

She didn't know she had it at the time, but it was there, slowly killing her.

Apparently when I was six, she was diagnosed with ovarian cancer.

She was never home, and I had no idea about anything.

According to my dad, she passed away the month after she was diagnosed.

Again, without a goodbye.

My whole life is fucked up.

I never ate. I was too stressed and depressed, I didn't think it was worth it.

I didn't want to live.

"Maybe I'm better off dead" I always thought to myself.

I'd always say "I'm fine."

But I really mean "I'm not okay." I promise you.

Relationships are like glass. Sometimes it's better to leave it broken rather than hurt yourself putting it back together.

It's just me and my shadow. And all of my regrets.

Who am I? Who am I?

Invisible.