Chapter 19: Imperfection Scars

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We were on the computer in my room, whispering. I heard Aleks moan, me and Seamus lookat each other. I logged on my computer, and got on Google Chrome.

"Ok, do you have a google account, if not I will make one for you," he whispered. I thought about it.

"I do, but it has a lot of emails, about stores, and stuff, can I make another one?" I asked quietly.

"Babe, what are you doing?" Aleks asked. I looked at him, he was stretching.

"Seamus is helping me making a YouTube," I said, and walked to him. He had no trouble sitting up. I sat next to him. I looked at Seamus, he had a smile, but it looked fake. I looked back at Aleks, he kissed me in the lips. I smiled at Aleks, I leaned in for another. I got back to the computer, and Seamus help me make my second Google account.

"Oh, Aleks, Tiffany is waiting at the creature house if you want to tell it's over or something," Seamus told him. He stood quite, staring at nothing. I waved my hand in front of his face. He cut out of it, and look at me.

"Oh, sure, I will come back," he said, he sighed in the way down. I felt really bad. So, I continued with Seamus with the Google account. I started feeling safe with Seamus, and Aleks. I started on the account, I knew how to do it. I just needed help with the YouTube stuff. I heard the door open, I went downstairs. It was my mom, Seamus looked suprised. I hugged my mom, she kept looking at Seamus.

"Mom, this is Seamus, our neighbor," I told her. She kept staring at him. "Mom, why are you staring at him?" I asked her waving my hand in front of her face.

"Oh, it's just that he looks so familiar," she said. I looked at Seamus.

"Wait, what do you mean he looks familiar?" I asked her. She remembered.

"You're Jordan's friend, right?" she asked. I looked suprised, she knew Jordan without even talking to them.

"Oh, you're Jordan's mom, hi haven't seen you since a long time," Seamus greeted her with a hug. I do not know what they are talking about.

"Is Jordan next door?" she asked, I looked at her. He nodded.

"Mom, what is going on, why does he say that your Jordan's mom?" I asked, it was so quiet that you can hear us breathing. I feagured it out, Jordan is my older brother. "Oh my god, why didn't you tell me!" I shouted at her. She just hurried up to the door to see Jordan. I went with her, Seamus did too. We heard shouting, it stopped when my mom rang the doorbell. James answered the door. He also looked surprised.

"Hi James, is Jordan here?" she asked him. He nodded, and brought us inside. Tiffany was still crying, her expression changed when she saw me. I looked at Jordan's expression, he was glad to see "mom".

"Mom, is that you? Wait, Monic is my little sister?" he asked. He found out too. So, we both have the same mom, and different dad or what? I just asked myself a lot of questions. I looked at Aleks, he looked frustrated. "Mom, why are you here?" he asked. I rolled my eyes, and walked back to the house. Seamus followed, of course. I went back into my room, and created my Youtube account. I started, but Seamus wanted me to get a shoutout. He took my facecam stuff, and took a video. He gave me a shoutout, and uploaded it to his account. Then I got Frapps, and we decided to go to the store tomorrow.

"What time tomorrow?" I said. He looked at his phone, to see if he didn't have anything planned. He had a lot of things planned.

"How about like at 2 o'clock, is that fine?" he asked. I nodded, and looked back in the computer. I check my phone, I had a text from Ray. I check what he texted me. It say "Skype me", I went to Skype to call him.  He answered.

"What up?" I asked him.

"Alejandro, decided to take the surgery to come home faster," he said, I was happy that he did that.

"Hey Raymond, I was thinking, I think you, Kim, and Alejandro should live here, in Colorado," I told him. He looked at Alejandro.

"Well, lets wait until Alejandro get better, then we'll start thinking," he said, I nodded. "Where is Aleks, is he with you?" he asked.

"No, but this is Seamus, he is a friend of mine, and Aleks," I said while smiling.  He just gave me a glare.

"Hey my battery is about to die, so I will talk to you when I am done charging it," Raymond said. I nodded quickly.

"Bye, Raymond," I said. He just hanged up on me. I didn't want to start a big fus about it, so I didn't care. Seamus was still on his phone, I got up to sit at my bed. Seamus looked around the room to find me, I was right in back of him. "So, tomorrow at 2 o'clock, which car are we using?" I asked him.

"We could use mine, since your mom is going to work tomorrow, with her car," he said. The doorbell rang, I got up and went to go get it. It was Aleks, and my mom. Seamus stayed up stairs, I opened the door. They both came in.

"So, Aleks, um...which choice did you take?" I asked him patently. He kept refusing my eye contact.

"I...I...I chose... I chose Tiffany, I...I am sorry," he said. I wanted to cry, but I didn't have a shoulder to cry on. I went upstairs, and got his clothes.

"Monic, what are you doing?" Seamus asked. I tried being ignorant, but I just stopped in the middle of the room. I fell on my knees, and cupped my head in my hands. Seamus helped me get back up, and feel better and confident. I got his clothes bundle up in a big ball. I went downstairs to the door, and shoved him away from the door to throw his clothes.

"I should of have never fell in love with you,  I should of never kissed you, I should of never let you in my house, I SHOULD OF NEVER, EVER HAD MET YOU!" I yelled at him, and slammed the door, and ran up stairs. Seamus saw me come in the room, and gave me a hug. I hugged him back, but tighter. I went to the bathroom, and clean my tears off my face. I got my pj's, and got ready to bed.

"He chose Tiffany, did he?" he asked. I nodded while staring at nothing. He looked down, silenced filled up the room. "Do you want me to comfort you or something? Anything you want tell me, I always have my phone, if you need me, okay?" he said showing his phone. I nodded, and had a lot of bad thoughts in my mind. Once he left, I went to my drawer, and got my pocket knife. I had to thought fighting each other. I went to my bed, and got my leg. I started to cutting words on my legs. Those words were my imperfections. I started screaming from all the pain. I heard my mom rushing to my room . She slammed the door, she took away the knife. I started shaking, she was calling 9-1-1, my mom carried me to the living room. I started screaming again, I stopped until they arrived. Once I was in the bed, I saw everybody next door outside. I started crying again, I looked at my leg. It was all bloody. Seamus rushed to my mom, asking her what happened. That is all I remembered until the next morning.

  "Is she going to be okay?" asked the guy. It was Seamus. I heard some sobbing in the back ground, I opened my eyes to see who it was. It was suprisenly Aleks. He was the first one to notice me opened my eyes. I looked around to see who else was here. It was Seamus, Aleks, Jordan, and my mom. Aleks got closed to me, I shoved him back.

"You better not get closed to me, did you hear me?" I pointed at him while saying that. He looked down , and looked back up at my while walking back in his chair. Everyone was all quiet, even the doctor. I felt a slight pain on my right leg, I uncovered it. It was all badged up, it was the one I cut myself. I cover my face with my hands when I saw it. I moaned very loudly. Seamus came to the side of the bed, and smiled. I smiled back, and looked to the doctor.

"Miss Camargo, do you know what words you cut yourself?" he asked me like an apportunity to see my scars.

"No, I don't know why I even did it," I told him. He unbandge my leg. It said, "Ugly, Fat, Wh***, Lonely, Unwanted, etc." I was really stressed. "When can I get out of the hospital, doctor?" I asked him.

"You can get out tomorrow, but you have to change the bandages every day, on own," he said.

"I will help her sir," Aleks voluntered. I rolled my eyes. 

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