Feelings Revealed

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My eyes drifted over to Carl's lanky frame as he walked along the deserted streets of Alexandria ahead of me. His hat was tilted on his head, his mousy brown hair peeking out from underneath. He bounced Judith on his hip, making her giggle. Carl smiled and his light blue eyes lit up. I bit my lip as knots formed in my stomach.

Man, I like this boy...

I can't say how it happened because I don't really know. It's like I just woke up one day and these feelings were there. I couldn't explain and I definitely couldn't control it. Carl and I had been friends since we met at the prison. My mom and I had been living in Woodbury when Rick and the others had rescued us.

I still remember those days vividly. The long nights Carl and I stayed up talking, the days Michonne would surprise us with comics...even the terrible days when my mom had gotten sick and died in the epidemic. I remember Carl had held me and let me cry. He'd always been there for me. I guess that's why it hurt so much to see him spend time with Enid.

She was different from me...adventurous, spontaneous...pretty. I knew Carl had feelings for her. Why else would he spend so much time with her?

Maybe its's cause you pushed him away, a tiny voice in the back of my head said.

I shook the thought away and sighed. It was true though. I was scared to let Carl know how I felt. I was older than he was so I had tried to force those feelings away. I was barely 20 and he had just turned 18. We'd known each other for so long, we were practically kids then. Maybe that's why it felt so wrong to me. But...the feelings kept coming back like a boomerang....and it was getting harder and harder to stay away from him.

A wooden screen door banged on its hinges to our left, snapping me out of my reverie. I smiled when I saw Carl's dad, Rick, come down the stairs of one of the two houses the Mayor had given us.

"How's my girl? Has she behaved?" Rick drawled as he came up to us, his clean-shaven face looking slightly foreign to me.

"Yeah, Sarah's been on her best behavior." Carl joked, looking at me sideways.

I rolled my eyes and elbowed him in the ribs. Carl handed Judith to rick as I watched them. The hem of Carl's shirt lifted up slightly, just enough so a glimpse of his skin could be seen. I blushed and looked away as Rick walked back into the house with Judith.

Silence ensued between us then and I fidgeted nervously.

"Well...I gotta go." I said awkwardly, turning to leave.

"Sarah, wait!" Carl said, walking up behind me.

A light breeze pushed his hat forward and he reached a hand up, re-adjusting it.

"Why have you been avoiding me?" he asked bluntly, his blue eyes questioning,"We never hang out anymore."

I swallowed a lump that had formed in my throat and pushed a strand of hair behind my ear absentmindedly.

"What do you call this then?" I said, faking a smile.

He saw right through it though and arched an eyebrow.

"This is the first time we've hung out in weeks," he stated, crossing his arms.

I shifted my weight from foot-to-foot.

"I, um...Look, I don't have time for this, okay?" I said, frustrated, as I started walking between the two houses.

Carl ran up behind me, catching my wrist in his hand. Goosebumps ran up my arm at his touch and I ripped my hand away from him. A hurt expression crossed his face and guilt coursed through me.

No, I told myself, it has to be this way.

"What did I do? Please, inform me because I have no idea," Carl sighed.

Finally, I couldn't keep it in any longer and I spun around to face him.

"It's everything okay? It's every single thing that you do! It drives me nuts!" I shouted, exasperated, "Not that you'd know since you've been obsessed with Enid lately."

He furrowed his eyebrows in confusion then realization dawned on him and he smirked at me.

"Sarah...you're jealous," he grinned, walking towards me.

I gulped and my heart began to race. No. No, no, no, no, NO!  He wasn't supposed to find out this way. He was never supposed to find out.

As he inched closer, my back hit the wall of one of the houses. I shut my eyes briefly, hoping Carl didn't notice my nervousness. He apparently did though because he was smirking at me once more as he reached up a hand to brush a strand of hair away from my face. His piercing blue eyes bored into mine.

"Sarah...how long have you felt this way?" he asked me, softly, his warm breath on my lips.

"Since...I met you. Back at the prison," I admitted somberly, "Right after my mom died."

His eyebrows shot to his hairline, clearly not expecting this answer.

"That long? And I never noticed," he said, more to himself than me.

He grinned then and leaned in, his cowboy hat brushing my forehead.

"Well...better late than never." he whispered before crashing his lips into mine.

It startled me at first but I soon melted into the kiss. His plump lips moved with mine and I lost myself in the feeling. I would never lose my feelings for him - that much was certain.

𝐂𝐀𝐑𝐋 𝐆𝐑𝐈𝐌𝐄𝐒 [ 𝐎𝐧𝐞 𝐒𝐡𝐨𝐭𝐬 ] ✘Where stories live. Discover now