The confusion on his face was almost enough for me to think about taking back my suggestion. Although, it made sense to me. The more I thought about it, the righter it felt.
"Frank, what are you-"
"I mean it." I hadn't realised how on board I was with this idea until I'd said it. Surely this was the best answer to our problems? "Let's just go. I want to be with you. I don't care what the law says."
Fuck the stupid shitty law. It wasn't right that just because we had met and formed a relationship, this meant that Gerard was a sex offender in the eyes of the police. I wasn't too young to know what I was doing.
"That may be the case. However, the authorities do not feel the same way." His sad expression made me feel bad and I hesitantly reached out to cup his cheek with my hand like he had done to me so many times.
He closed his eyes and sighed. For a moment, it looked like he was actually considering it. Then his eyes opened again and he stood up, pushing past me into the middle of the room. "I could never allow you to do that, Frank. That is too much to ask of you."
I stood up as well and turned to watch him. He was pacing and messing his hair up so much that it was practically standing on end.
"It isn't, I promise. You mean more to me than anything."
He paused to glance over to me. "Is that truthfully the circumstance?"
I nodded, moving in front of him again and then looking up at him. "I really mean it."
His expression was unreadable as he stared back at me, his bloodshot eyes looking conflicted. When it had been silent for whoever knows how long, he rested his forehead against mine and closed his eyes.
Those stupid fucking butterflies were back no matter how many times he had gotten this close to me and I matched my breathing to his. "Please." My voice was barely audible, "I..."
I didn't get the chance to continue though because his lips finally found mine and his arms wrapped around my waist to pull me closer to him. I had forgotten how much I loved to kiss him.
We stood like that for what felt like ages, just kissing in the middle of his Living Room. My hands had ended up around his neck and I suddenly didn't want to let go. I felt safe in his arms; as if nothing bad could happen.
Eventually, he pulled away again to breathe. He rested his forehead against mine again and spoke softly, "Where would you like to go?"
My face almost hurt from how wide I smiled and I precipitously pulled him into another kiss, still smiling into it. Fuck, I was so invested in this.
His hands moved under my t-shirt and they lightly traced circles on my back. Before anything more could happen though, he pulled away again and removed his hands completely.
I opened my eyes in confusion to see his sad expression. "It cannot be done, Frank."
"Why not?" I frowned. He had practically agreed a minute ago.
He shook his head, slowly moving my hands from around his neck. "You have a life here. I would hate to disrupt it."
"I don't give a shit about here!" I argued, "My mom's fine with Richard, I barely see my dad anymore and I don't even speak to Willow."
He frowned. "Frank-"
"You're my life!" It was actually so true that it almost hurt. I had no idea what I did with my time or my thoughts before I'd met him.
His sad expression didn't disappear. He replied quietly, "I have a daughter. I cannot abscond and leave her."
I'd completely forgotten about her. It wasn't fair to make him uproot his family but I was selfish and I wanted him to myself. Hell, I was onboard with any scenario that let me stay with him.
I quickly thought through the available options. I was getting desperate. "We can take her with us!"
He made a noise in the back of his throat. "Frank, this is getting ridic-"
"Please!" I finally broke down, clinging onto his shirt and pressing my face into his chest, "I just want to be with you."
It was silent. All I heard was my breathing as I tried not to cry. I wasn't a fan of crying in front of other people and I only did if I couldn't help myself.
I felt his hand stroke the back of my head. "I suppose if the circumstances were different..." His voice caused me to look up again, "We could have had the most beautiful relationship." His dejected smile finally caused tears to roll down my cheeks.
I closed my eyes and rested my head against his chest again. "It's not fair." My voice was muffled slightly in his clothing.
"I know." He sighed, "I would have shown you off."
"What?" I looked up again, ignoring the wetness on my face and now on his shirt.
His hand continued to stroke my hair. "If this relationship were legal, I would introduce you to my companions and relations and shown you off. Flaunt you, as it were."
"Why?" I couldn't help but smile, given the situation.
His sad smile finally lost some of its bleakness. "Because I love you."
