november 13th, 2016
I AM A WRECK OF
HATING MYSELF AND
LOVING YOU.
I AM CRUMBLING AT THE
THOUGHT OF YOU IN HIS
ARMS ,
MY HEART ACHES oh god it aches FROM JUST HEARING YOUR name.
STOP PLEASE please make it stop.
PLEASE HELP MY SELF ESTEEM STOP DROPPING >>
I CANT YELL AT YOU, darling.
oh remember when that word was beautiful?
REMEMBER when i was, too?
i know i know i know you must hate me. i know i do.
i can't love you. THEN WHY DO i?
I CANT HATE YOU. so why is it so easy for me ITS JUST BECAUSE i'm bleeding of "how could you"s and "WHY DIDNT YOU TELL ME SOONER" and possibly,
"i was right all along".
just like you planned him ,
did you plan me , too?
oh no your plan went awry >>
that's why I WAS the one to ask you
I WAS the one to tell you i'm hurting and I WAS the one who found through a mutual friend that i was discarded---------- oh. wait.
doesn't this sound familiar darling?
doesn't this sound oddly true?
doesn't all this sound a lot like you?
well now you know what i'm feeling.
congrats on finding your lover. i sincerely hope he gives you the happiness that i never could.
(euphoria isn't found in people.)
besides , (he doesn't deserve you.)
you're so much better than him.
but then again , (neither do i.)
