2: I Will Always Love You

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Beckett decides that it would be best to break up with Castle and can't help but wonder what would happen if she didn't leave

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Bittersweet memories
That is all I'm taking with me
So, goodbye
Please, don't cry
We both know I'm not what you, you need

Whitney Houston - I Will Always Love You

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"Kate don't do this to me." Rick pleaded as his eyes rimmed with tears. She was leaving. She was gathering her things and leaving. His heart was breaking at the sight of her in this state, he couldn't help but feel as though he was partially responsible. She looked disheveled. Her eyes dull, the dark circles under them protruding. He hair was ticked to one side, obviously having been raked through by her fingers repeatedly. But he needed her to stay, he wanted to keep her safe and protect her. He was positive that they could work through this rough patch together, and come out even stronger on the other side.

"It's the only way you'll stay safe." She choked out, suppressing her own tears. She loved him, but she had to leave him. It was the best option in her mind, it was an option where he would stay safe. He was the most important person in her life, the only one that had believed she would catch her mothers killer. And look where that got them. But Beckett wouldn't be able to live with herself if something happened to him. The man of her dreams, and the love of her life. He understood her like no one else, and was by her side one hundred percent of the time. And it was only a matter of time before he realized that she was just damaged goods, that she was broken beyond repair. And she needed him to realize that so he could let her go.

"No, this isn't, I can't lose you." He begged. His hands twitching to touch her, to hold her. But he didn't want to scare her any further away than she already was.

"I'm sorry." She looked down, wiping her tears, and picked up her bag. She took a big breathe. Was she really going to do this? Was this really the right thing to do? It had to be for the amount of pain it was causing her. With all the force her heart was taking, all the hits it had been given, it had to be worth it for his safety. She will never not love him, and after all this is why she was leaving him. Love.

"What did I do?" He was pleading. He was going to get down on his hands and knees and kiss her feet to make her stay. He would do anything, anything to make her stay. He needed her to stay, she was the light of his life. But what he didn't understand was that it was nothing that he did, or something he said. It was solely her. Her responsibility to finish this and get him out of the crosshairs. To stop him from being a liability to be held against her.

"Nothing, you did absolutely nothing. You're perfect, and I need you to stay that way. Me being here isn't protecting you. I have to leave." She cried and turned to leave, but Rick grabbed her wrist and turned her back to face him. She could feel his staggered breathe against her. Could basically feel his fear radiating off of him. And it killed her. But she was keeping him safe. She avoided his eyes, because she knew that if she stared into them she would stay. She had drowned in them for years, him being one of the few people to make her constantly feel at home, while he could be very annoying at times, she loved him to death. And they were married for Christ's sake! What is she thinking! She had decided to listen to her head and not her heart, because her heart was mostly wrong, it only led to more pain and aching. Except it wasn't wrong about Castle. He had been exactly what she needed. He would always be what she needed. But then why did this hurt so much?

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