Fight for Me #Wattys2017

Chapter 30

I know he followed me, but I'm too angry at myself to notice. I stumble into an alleyway, my stomach churning for a second before the acrid taste takes over my senses. Tears stream down my face and I slide down the opposite wall. My elbows are propped up on my knees, and my hands shield my face from the world. "Andy, are you okay?" Luke asks me kindly, and I can hear him crouching down in front of me. "That was stupid. Of course, you're not."

He takes a minute to realize I'm not going to say anything or move anytime soon. Luke picks me up off the ground and holds me close to his chest. "I'm calling a cab to take us back." He whispers to me, pulling out his phone with one hand and rubbing circles into my back with the other."It's okay." He whispers into my hair comfortingly. Even if I wanted to, I can't say anything. My throats feel too tight, and I can't stop the sobs that shake my whole body. "I'm never going to leave you, Andy. Not if I can help it." When Luke says this, I feel like is what sends me over the edge. I wrap my arms around his waist tightly, just to be sure he won't leave me.

The cab ride back to the house was quiet. Luke refused to let go of me, and I was the same way with him. My wrist and knuckles were throbbing in pain. I barely managed a glance at them without feeling sick again. I split open a bit of skin on my knuckles, and my left wrist is already starting to swell and bruise. "We'll take care of that when we get back. Okay?" Luke checks on me for the hundredth time, kissing my temple as he gently brushes his fingers through my hair. I nod, looking up at him with puffy eyes and wishing this day hadn't become such a disaster.

The driver pulls in front of the house as close as he can with the cars that still litter the driveway and street. Luke pays the fare, and we head towards the house to see the party in mid-swing as people are slowly trickling out.

I don't say anything as I pull Luke to the side of the house where my room is. I get a decent foothold and push off it to propel myself into my room. Luke follows a moment after.

"I don't want them to see me like this," I whisper to him, and he nods clearly understanding what I mean. "I'm sorry you had to see that. I'm sorry I lost control." I bite my lip as I try to fight off another round of tears. "I never lose control like that. I swear, I've never intentionally hit someone like that before. I don't even know what got into me. It's just he was hurting my wrist, and he wouldn't let go. Then he started saying all those things, and I just snapped. I've never done that before." I babble, my words slurring together amidst the tears and hiccups.

He says nothing. Instead, he sits next to me, and pulls me close, whispering a smile, "I know." There's no hatred or disgust in his voice. Nothing negative, but I can hear it—the pain. "I love you. No matter what happens. I love you. What happened back there was self-defense, and after you left I lost it too. I made sure he knew to never speak to you like that again, or talk to you in general. You can't beat yourself up over this. Look at what he did to you." Luke says, his eyes welling up with tears as he gingerly holds my wrist.

"You aren't scared of me?" I ask, worried he'll run just like the others have done when they get too close or see my dark side.

"No. If anything, now I think of you as my kick butt girlfriend." Luke chuckles and his contagious laughter gets me doing the same. "I love your smile." He whispers his hand gently resting on my cheek as he traces over my cheekbones. "Actually, correction." He pauses for a moment, kissing my nose. "I love everything about you."

I roll my eyes at him. "I love you, too," I reply, smiling at the foreign words. "Can you get me an ice pack for this?" I ask him motioning to my wrist.

"Of course, I'll be back in a moment, love." He says tenderly kissing my temple, and making sure I know he'll be right back before he leaves. I take the moment of privacy to change out of my shorts and into sweatpants. I go to find a clean shirt— seeing as how mine is covered in tears and alley grime— but I don't find any since I forgot to do laundry. "I couldn't find an actual ice pack. So I brought you a bag of ice instead." Luke informs me as he walks back into the room.

"Can I borrow a shirt? I forgot to do laundry again." I mumble giving him an innocent smile.

"Will I get this one back?" Luke chuckles as he gently presses the bag of ice to my wrist. I wonder at the sudden chill but appreciate the numbness. "I still haven't gotten the one you borrowed last time."

"Maybe." I tease because we both know he'll probably never get either of them back. Turns out, I'm that girlfriend that steal her boyfriend's clothes and never returns them. "Plus, the sweatshirt still smells like you. It's comforting."

"And what exactly do I smell like?" He asks, a mischievous grin on his face as he puts his hands on my waist.

"Like your cologne and mint. It's an odd combination, but I like it."

He just shakes his head at my answer. "I'll go get one of my shirts for you. The party's winding down, so everyone is distracted if you want to sneak to the bathroom so you can clean up."

"That's probably a good idea. I'll just get your shirt before I clean up."

"Let me go grab it then." Luke smiles, looking proud at my improved mood. I hear him leave, and grab myself a fresh set of comfy clothes. "Here you go, babe." He says from behind me as he rests his chin on my shoulder. I look at the shirt he gave me. It's his infamous "YOU COMPLETE MEss" shirt, which he knows I love.

"Thank you," I whisper back, kissing his cheek before slipping out of my room and down the hall to the bathroom. I nearly shout for joy when I'm inside without anyone noticing. The water takes a minute to heat up, so I decide to brush my teeth while I wait. When the water hits my skin, I wish I could wash away the bad parts of today like I can the grime on my skin. Unfortunately, life is never that easy.

I quickly finish up my shower. Slipping my sweatpants and Luke's shirt on before heading back to my room, using my towel to dry my hair as I go. "Andy, how was the date?" Nico asks as he blocks my path. I start freaking out, as I move my towel so he can't see my wrist.

"It was good," I tell him quickly, feeling queasy for lying to him and from the smell of alcohol lingering on his breath. Nico isn't one to drink heavily, but he'll have a couple at social events. "Drink some water and go to sleep, Nico. You'll thank me for it in the morning." I chuckle as he pouts and walks away. I slip back into my room to find Luke sitting there, with my song notebook in his lap. "Find anything interesting?" I ask him with a raised eyebrow, and he looks up at me knowing he was just caught red-handed. "Don't worry. I'm not mad."

"Good, because I wanted to tell you these lyrics are amazing." He smiles at me, scooting over to make room for me on the bed.

"Thanks, I guess," I reply, draping a towel over my desk chair. I pull back the covers on my bed and climb underneath. Luke pulls me close to him, so my head is on his chest and his arm is wrapped around my waist.

"Are you feeling any better?" Luke asks me as he brushes some hair from my face. I just shake my head, unable to voice the thought running through my head. "Andy,--" He says my name softly, and sighing as he continues. "--I'm here for you. I'm not leaving you. I love you."

"I love you too," I whisper back to him. "I'm sorry about today. It was supposed to be perfect, and I messed it all up."

"You didn't mess anything up. Peter's thick head did." Luke laughs at the comment, and I do too. "Get some sleep, love. I'll see you in the morning." He tells me as he moves to leave, but I catch his hand before he gets too far.

"Will you stay? Please?" I ask him, only imagining how anxious I look from the thought of being alone right now. Luke nods, promising he'll be back in a minute. When he comes back, he's in a Nirvana shirt and sweatpants. I pull back the covers for him, and he looks at me nervously. "Are you scared to sleep under the covers with me?" I tease, feeling a little bit light-hearted.

"Nope. I was just imagining what would happen if your brothers caught us in the same bed."

I roll my eyes at him, patting the empty spot. "They trust me enough to know I wouldn't let you try anything. Plus, Mason would probably be too busy gawking at how cute we are."

"I guess, you're right." He chuckles climbing in, and once again holding me close. I lay there, listening to his heartbeat and the sound of his voice. When he thinks I'm asleep I can feel him looking at me as he whispers, "I don't know why you chose me, but I'm so glad you did. I love you so much more than you know."

I barely manage a smile as I mumble back an 'I love you too' into his chest.