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I feel so terrible.

You don't have to read what's below. If you really want to, be prepared for a long rant and probably upsetting crap I'm pretty dramatic. I just need to .... vent? I don't know XD

So I had this girlfriend right? Gorgeous girl, kind, talented, liked me, "loved" me actually. She was pretty much perfect. I know there is a downside to every good thing, and a good side to every bad thing. I figured the bad thing about her was that she (claimed) lived in New York. And was a couple years younger than me which I didn't like.
But I loved her anyways. I know it's a weird thing to love someone at a young age and only dating for 4 months or something. But she was special.

Well... she would have to leave every few weeks for an unknown amount of time because of her parents being really suspicious.
She left the day before April fools day. Again. I just waited like always. It was a few days like usual. When I get a message back. 10:40 freaking pm.

That I should leave her. That she's not good enough.

Now she says this a lot. She really thinks I'm better than her. I've never understood that. She's perfect pretty much. I suck.

She ... told me she lied. A lot.

She lied about where she lived. I get that. I could forgive that. Her parents are really strict about that so yeah.

She lied about being a model. I don't know how though she's hot. And honestly, I don't care. I could forgive that. People do that stuff to impress people.

But....... she lied about something that I could and will never understand or forgive.

She said she had cancer.

She lied.

Even if the distance wasn't causing her stress and she hadn't lied about anything else, I wouldn't have forgave her.

I don't know why she did that. I am still so confused about it all.

And still after all that I miss her. Or who I thought she was.

She was so kind to me. The only person who noticed when I was upset or actually cared. She was so beautiful and had a mind like no other. Smart and mature.

She's gone now and I don't know what to think or do or say. I'm pissed but upset. I hate myself for trusting her at all.

This is similar to how my last relationship was. All lies. Betrayal.

I'm done trusting anyone.

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