Ethel

Time.

"Cris! stop please!"i said, running after him, my ankles hurting in every damn step in these heels.

he kept walking without turning. i saw his hand reach up to his face. he was wiping his tears. wait..he was crying!

"please i can't run anymore, Cris! "i said, stopping to breath. soon my face was covered in tears. all of this was too much. i took off my heels and looked up. he had stopped. "Listen to me. it will be alright!trust me he did not mean it!"

without turning back, he replied"do you?"

"what?"i said, confused.

"do you believe in a better life with Charlie, Ethel?maybe he is right! maybe i'm just showing things off to impress you!maybe i can not love you everyday if we marry...i'm always busy!i cannot Have a Family!"he says, coming towards me now.

he was crying so badly...his face was nothing but pain. it was late night and we were standing alone, still on the deserted road.

"you know what?we can  always talk about this later! guess what? i will come with you to your house tonight!!"i say, trying to change the topic and cheer him.

"answer me , please."he says, in a really serious manner.

I cannot skip this. he will come after me to get to know what i feel. he wants to know but...but what will i say?i am pretty confused myself! one side is what i have HAD ever since, supportive. caring. a part of me.and on the other side is Cristiano Ronaldo Dos Santos Aveiro. everything I ever WANTED. loving, Perfect in every damn thing. it's going to be really hard.i need to think for eternity!

"I...Cris I Need Time. this is the truth. "i say, feeling confident about myself and the answer.

i can see the pain in his expression...along with hurt. but it's not my fault...i need to think first. my quick decision can break one of them completely. most importantly-i will be finished. forced to end my ugly life.

we walked side by side back to his car. i had put my heels on back, and when i saw my face in the side view mirror as the cold night breeze hit my face, i knew i had lesser time than i thought there was. this thing was killing me.

as we turned to his street, his tears were still coming. he was still crying.

I finaly had to say."it's nothing to be afraid of! trust me, it will be alright!what's it that's making you cry so much!"i was shocked by the rudeness in my voice. i did not want to sound rude and mean. i loved him and this was my fault!

i was not expecting an answer from him . but as his house came into the view, he suddenly answered, his voice completely shattered.

"What Cowardice it is to be dismayed by the happiness of others and devastated by there good fortune!"

After this, i kept looking into my confused mind...for some word that would ease his pain but i never did. i never found a word. 

Distance Doesn't separate people, silence does.

_____________________________________________________________

We got inside, without speaking a word. i went straight to his sisters room and opened the wardrobe. it was empty. i went to his mother's, Junior's but they were empty too.

I had to ask him. i went to his room, hundred questions in my mind. he was lying on his bed, his phone being the only bright thing in the room.he looked fine now.

"come on. sleep. it's late."he said, looking up from the screen.

"umm...where is everyone else?"i asked.

"they left. why?"he says, sitting up.

"I need to change...into something!"i said, a smile on my face as i ran my hand through my hair.

"oh yes.but i don't have girl clothes..."he said, getting up to search."why would i have a girl's clothes in the first place?"he says, questioning his own statement.

"no!i mean look at you....i won't be shocked if i did find some in your room!just saying.."i said, hugging him now. this was what i wanted. only peace and love and these light moments.

"this might work for tonight !"he says, grabbing one of his tee.seriously?

"I need something else too!"i say, looking at him in shock. but somewhere, i was laughing deep inside, controlling so hard!

"trust me,my shorts wont fit you. i swear i won't even glance at you! "he says, a smirk on his face.

i punch him hard and go to change. it was not a big problem. he was already asleep when i came. and the t-shirt was soo big for me!

i quietly slipped into the bed covers next to him. 

i was about to sleep when i felt his arm over me. he will never stop being Cris. i could feel him breathing on my neck and i heard him say. i heard him say what i wanted to hear every damn night of my life.

"I hope one day when i wake up late,I'll be able to turn my head and see you sleeping right next to me."

and tonight I will fall asleep with you in my heart.