All or Nothing (Urban) Book 9 | The Sideline Series

Chapter 50

Theodore III

"Wake up mother fucker!"

Ice cold water was thrown on to my body, quickly making me sit up but my head was pounding and dried up blood was all over my face and body. What happened last night? I was lying under the toilet in my cell with a pounding head ache but even more questions about how I ended up under the toilet. 

The last thing I remember doing is reading the letter Daniel sent me. It was something about him and Kennedy running off and getting married because she's pregnant. The bright lights the CO's were shining in my face was making my head hurt even more, so I squinted my eyes and looked across my room at my bed. Sure enough, the pictures and letter were still laying on my bed. But how did I end up over here?

"I-Is my Grandma still here?" I asked, looking around for her since I remember her being here last night.

Officer Harden sucked his teeth. "This nigga is losing it in here. He's still talking about his Grandma and that bitch has been dead for years."

"I saw her last night!"

"She's dead!" he yelled in my face. "You claim you see her almost every week and we find you in here torturing yourself. Last week, you said she told you to suffocate yourself with your covers. Luckily, we got in here before you killed your dumb ass! That's why you don't have covers on your bed now Reed, because you're too dangerous. You're going crazy and you're making our jobs harder since we have to constantly keep an eye on your crazy ass."

"It won't be for long," Officer Stanley smirked. He was the CO that tried to beat my ass in a hallway with no cameras but I beat his instead. Now, he's walking around with a bandage around his hand and a scar under his left eye. "He's been sitting in here for years on death row. His time is almost up."

"He's gonna kill himself before the state gets a chance to though," Officer Harden shook his head. 

I frowned as I listened to them talk about me being put on death row. Yeah, I'm sitting around waiting to be killed off, but by the time they actually get to me I'll either have killed myself or died from the terrible conditions in here. So, in other words, I'll be in here for the rest of my life for everything I've done but there's no way they're going to get through everybody ahead of me for me to get a lethal injection. It won't happen. I'll rot in here before they do, so they can laugh about me all they want but I am the way I am because of them mistreating me and the horrible conditions of this prison.

"He's costing us money every time he tries to take his life," Officer Harden continued. "He tries it every week when he claims he's talking to his Grandma."

I scrunched up my face. I know they're right but I keep having this reoccurring dreams about Grandma coming to kill me almost every night. Some nights are worse than others, like last night. I really thought she killed me last night. I looked down at my chest that didn't have a knife sticking through it and sighed. It had to be a dream then, like always. I know Grandma's dead but I swear she comes to me every night trying to kill me for ruining her family and she has every right to. I ruined the family and now there's none of us left to carry the name on or to make it better since we're all dead or in jail. 

"I deserve to be killed," I cried to myself. I lifted my arms up to try to wipe the tears off of my face but I couldn't. The CO's handcuffed me to the toilet, making me frown. "Let me go. Let me go so I can die and repent! Let me die!"

Officer Stanley bent down and smacked me across the face. "Shut the fuck up inmate! You don't deserve to die. For all the shit you've done, you deserve to stay in here for the rest of your life. Just you and these four padded walls. It's nothing wrong with you except the fact that you're losing your mind since you don't have any contact with the outside world. Now, you've resorted to talking to yourself and having imaginary conversations with your dead family members. Everybody in your family is dead!"