Something's gotta give

34 - The Letter

As promised, neither Zach nor Brent had been trying to hold her back. Wondering about herself she felt somehow sad about that. 'Well, at least they're reliable', she thought. She took her phone and tried to call Tommy. It took a few seconds before he answered. "Tommy. Who's there?" He sounded enervated. "Sorry to disturb you, it's Charlie. Are you busy?" She heard the noises of traffic and silently called herself a dumbass. Of course... he was taking Tedder to the airport! She quickly added: "Don't say my name, please! I forgot, you're driving him to the airport, right? Listen, just tell me if I'm right... I need my suitcase... Just confirm or deny: It's that blue button at the roof above the driver's seat to open the trunk?" Tommy was quiet for a moment. "Uhm... yeah, that's right. Just a second." Charlie realized he'd just muted her. 'Fuck!', she thought. 'Don't you dare to tell him it's me you're talking to!'

"Are you still there?" she suddenly heard Tommy asking. "Yeah." "Listen, you need to check on your handbag." "What? Why?" She was irritated. Tommy sounded nervous, answering: "Just do it. I've been ordered to tell you. Bye." He interrupted her call without further explanation. Charlie looked at her phone, stunned and in surprise. She didn't have to think about what she'd just heard for a long time. 'Bastard!' she whispered, but she didn't mean Tommy. No matter if Tedder's driver had mentioned her name or not: Doubtlessly, his passenger immediately must have sensed it had been Charlie calling, and he hadn't wasted any time but commanding his chauffeur what to tell her.

She entered the bus and went straight to her compartment. Her handbag was laying on her bed and she was absolutely sure she hadn't placed it there herself. 'Oh, such a decent hint', she thought. 'Was it really necessary to have Tommy giving me that instruction?'

She sat down, hesitating. She slowly grabbed her bag and put it on her lap. She sighed and didn't really want to open it. But then again, she was curious and wanted to know what was inside and so she opened it slowly. Of course... a folded sheet, what a surprise. She sighed again and unfolded it. There was a very short handwritten note. It said:

Stay.

Please.

X

RT

She snorted. 'Yeah... you BET! I'm NOT!' she thought, immediately crumpled it up and threw it over her shoulder. What had he been thinking, writing that note? 'X? Really? Fuck yourself! You really thought you'd get away with this? A fucking written X ought to be enough to let me forget about everything you've done to me? All your bad, disgusting behavior, all that mocking, all the patronizing? And now, on top of it all, you were checking out on my handbag? Well... too bad you can't watch me leaving!'

She fetched her suitcase from the trunk, went back and threw it on her bed. When she opened it the first thing she saw was a sealed envelope. 'Oh no", she thought. 'Another short note, Tedder? Don't make such an afford trying to hold me back!'

She was already about to tear it apart unread - but then she noticed it was thicker than just to contain just one piece of paper. There was something solid inside. 'OK... you got me. I'm curious...' she thought, opening it carefully. Taking a look inside she saw... a hard covered backstage pass with a picture of hers. 'What the actual fuck... All access?' She turned it indecisively in her hand. Eventually, she dragged the folded sheet out of the envelope.

She started to read - and felt her anger rising immediately.

"My dear Charlotte..." He knew very good how she hated it to be called by her given name. But she went on reading.

"My apologies for touching your personal things. I'm aware this will enrage you, as well as the short note I left in your handbag. I'm pretty sure you've already thrown it away shortly after reading. Understandable. But I needed your attention to read this letter. I hope I got it.

Charles, I know very well what a free spirit you are and I don't have any doubts you're still about to leave. The fact you're reading these lines know is proof enough I'm right. Speaking of free spirits... we are very much alike. Too much, maybe... as ever getting along well?

I was hoping very much that we could have a great friendship, one day. Maybe the control freak I doubtlessly am raised a barrier between us - to be honest: I'm sure it did. But as much as our debates on this subject were annoying to you I have to admit: I enjoyed every single second. Because we're equal. Because you've never backed down or given up. Even if it might make you angry now: I was having fun. I don't need any apple-polishers around me. I need controversy.

And I'm pretty sure: So did you. Any other would've withdrawn, already. I think I know you're caring about money just as little as me. Otherwise, we would've left it all to our attorneys, already. And you wouldn't be reading my letter now.

Charlie, I hope you won't be getting me wrong now saying: You're more manly than I've ever expected. That's not supposed to be an insult but an appreciation. Despite of your appearance, which is just solely a seduction to... well... anyone with testosterone.

Though it's always the looks, pulling anyone in, at first - I had to learn there's more, much more about you. You've turned out to be - how shall I say it without you, getting me wrong, once more? When we first met, back then in London, I didn't just look at you. I'd like to think I've looked right through you. I really can't explain completely but I was able to take a look beneath your well-played surface. Don't ask me why, exactly - I'm unable to pin-point.

All I know is: I knew you were trouble. Believe it or not, I wasn't that surprised when you suddenly showed up and we all found out you'd been playing us, pretending to be just Seb's assistant. It's impossible to say why I knew there was something more than just that about you. Maybe it was something in your eyes or manners. Either way, I wasn't as upset as I usually get when somebody's trying to trick me.

It was written all over your face what you were going through when you turned up and solved the situation. If I had to guess I'd say you had rather run away but to face us and tell the truth, right? That would've been so much easier but yet... you faced us.

And you've faced me, so many times. Without fear to say no when I said yes and to say yes when I said no. Again, what I've written above about needing controversy wasn't just a platitude. I can't promise this is going to change some day because it's in my genes and part of my character.

We've had a rough start and a demanding journey so far, I know that. But didn't you've had fun though, too? You really want to miss this?

You know I've been through some issues, the injuring and the dissensions of a very personal and private kind. They've put me into a depressive state of mind. That can't be any excuse for treating you unfairly, of course. But I'd like you to know I'm working on it, so things can only get better. At least I do hope so.

I am not quite sure what to expect of my (short) trip home but at least clarification. It's a necessity to have some head space for the writings. I still hope you're gonna be there so you'll be able to see what I mean.

To show you I do think you're already part of our... gang, team, whatever you prefer... and I am serious about this: The included backstage pass which is actually a key card will open any and every door for you. There's no limits to you anymore. You can go wherever you want to, whenever you like. Yes, even when I'm away - if that question has just crossed your mind ;-) !

That's all I have to say at the moment. Except for: It never was my intention to drive you away.

Goodbye - hopefully!

RT"

Charlie had to swallow. 'Hm... I guess that's as close to any excuse as I will ever get, huh? Nice try, but don't expect me to kiss your ass now, idiot!' Secretly, she was stunned that he'd written such an openly and long letter. Apart from the fact he had just given her full access. Even in his absence.