Chapter 47: Stacks

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Carter

I watched Elinn run out of the room and stood to go after her. Before I could take three steps my mother was by my side holding me back. I looked at her questioningly and she pointed behind me to the shocked faces of my mates parents.

"Alpha Zayden, Adara, nothing you did caused her to run out like that. Elinn has had a very traumatic past and she suffers from PTSD. If I were to guess she just had an episode and remembered something rather unpleasant. I assure you she will tell you about it someday, but I will not force her to talk about it until she is ready. If you'll excuse me," I said and rushed out. They were owed a better explanation, but I didn't really have time for one.

I sniffed the air and followed the intoxicating smell of the ocean. As I reached the large doors, I realized she had fled to the library. It must be somewhere she felt safe if this was where she came after one of her attacks. I pushed the door open and followed her inside.

"Carter, come over here!" Ruthan beaconed giving me an evil glare. I quickly scanned the library before hurrying over to Ruthy's desk. I was a little impatient to find my upset mate, but she could help me find her faster than I could on my own.

"What did you do to that poor girl? She ran in here crying with her arms wrapped around her chest as if trying to comfort herself. I swear if you hurt that innocent creature I will never let you take a book from here again!" Ruthan whisper yelled at me. I smiled at her and quickly explained the situation.

"Elinn has some bad memories of the past. Sometimes they come back to her and make her very upset and cause her to get like this. I'm trying to find her so that I can help her. Ruthan, did you see where she went? I really need to talk this through with her." Ruthan nodded understandingly and pointed towards the kids section. I took off and began searching the shelves.

When I found Elinn she was curled up between two stacks of children's books. Her eyes were hollow and empty as she stared at the shelf in front of her. I slowed my pace to a walk so I wouldn't startle her. I needed to hold her to remind her that she was in the here and now not back with those monsters from her old pack.

"Elinn, is it okay if I sit next to you?" Her eyes never moved and she gave no indication that she could hear me. Cautiously I lowered myself so that I was near her, but still far enough away that she wouldn't feel trapped.

"I've never read any of these books. They are children's books, books that a parent is meant to read to their child. I should have been able to sit on a couch and listen to my Mom read me books. My father should have been there to help me learn to read. Xander and Darius were suppose to be able to read me to sleep when I had nightmares in the middle of the night.

I never got to watch scary movies with my family and cuddle with them when I screamed. Kids are meant to learn how to write and draw to show their parents their hard work. They are suppose to be loved and cared for, cherished as I never was.

I never got that, when I should have been listening to kids books, I was learning how to clean blood out of carpets. Instead of coloring pictures with my brothers, I learned to keep my eyes down and my mouth shut. I was never loved, I was whipped until I was nearly dead and thrown in a cold room by myself to deal with it.

What did I do to deserve this? Why.....why did I have to be beaten everyday without mercy? Is someone punishing me for something? Was I just meant to live a life of pain and misery and you just ruined the whole plan?" Elinn's eyes were devoid of feeling. That look broke my heart, because it meant that she actually believed what she was saying.

"You're right you should have been able to do those things. Every child should have the opportunity to read books with their parents and play with their siblings. But, you never got to do those things, and you're right it is a tragedy that you never got to experience those things.

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