Idol ~ Min Yoongi

XXXVI: I'm Sorry

Makseun P.o.V

Everything hurts.

My hands hurt.

My back hurts.

My stomach hurts.

My shoulder hurts.

Everything hurts.

I slowly open my eyes, breath and body shaky. It takes a while for my eyes to focus, but when they do I see I'm lay in a pile of green glass, most of which was embedded in my skin. I slowly ease myself into a sitting position, struggling to unsitck myself from the tacky blood on the floor.

My clock reads four am. I've been here for eight hours... I need to get to the hotel. Slowly I ease to my feet, trying to brush the glass from my skin. My hands and side were littered with small red cuts and stained with dried blood. I twist to look at my back in the mirror, biting my lip.

One, two, three, four, five, six... Seven, eight, nine... Ten, eleven, twelve. He hit me twelve times. Twelve new scars in one night. He's never hurt me so much at once... I feel stiff and even breathing stretches the cuts to the point of pain. I slowly make my way to the wardrobe, carefully opening it and looking for a different top to wear. I find a black tee and pull it on carefully, grimacing when it tugs at the scabs.

Everything feels heavy. My back weighs so much and my arm feels numb. My brain feels like cotton wool and my eye lids feel like hey weigh a million tonnes. My stomach growls with Hunger and anxiety as I struggle to get my sling back on. I feel my phone in my back pocket and pull it out, calling for a taxi to pick me up. The taxi arrives and I get in, telling the driver the address and trying to avoid leaning on the chair.

We arrive at the hotel and I give the man the 20,000 I keep in the back of my phone case and tell him to keep the change as I head inside, climbing into the lift and wait for it to reach my floor. I hurry out and rummage through my pockets for my keys.

Shit, where are they?

Ah I gave them to Yoongi...

I sigh and knock quietly, not wanting to wake him but not wanting to be stuck out in the hall.

After a few moments the door opens slowly and a tired looking Yoongi gives me a quizzical look before a smile plays on his lips. "Hey, baby." He grumbled, stepping out the way so I can get in. I smile back nervously, skirting around him and kicking off my boots. "What did Ahn want?" He mumbles, closing the door and leaning on the wall tiredly with drooping eyes.

"Nothing much, just some last minute things to sort out in the Arena." I lie, surprising myself at how easily it came.

He grunted in response and his head dropped for a moment before he jerked it back up, stumbling his way to the bed and flopping down. He opened his arms as if asking me to come over. "Come on, baby... It's late..."

"I'll come in a minute, go to sleep, hyung." I say quietly, smiling slightly when he nods and snuggles up in the blanket. He falls asleep almost instantly.

I walk into the bathroom and pull of the shirt tentatively, looking at myself in the mirror. Shit... These are bad... I grab the small black flannel from the side and soak it in warm water, carefully dabbing at the wounds and wiping away the blood. I cleaned myself off as well as I could and see that only a few of them are deep. Most of the cuts were shallow surface wounds that'll probably heal over in a week or so, but there were two or three that'll probably need stitches...

Mums not here to help though...

Tears force their ways into my eyes and I lean heavily on the counter. I let the pain into my mind, I let myself relay a lifetime of abuse over and over, I let myself think of my mum, I let myself think of all the things he could've done to Liu when I was away. I let out all the anger, the sadness, the fear. I struggle to keep myself quiet and end up biting down on my hand to do so.