Tattoos // Z.M A.U

Chapter 35

When I came home last night, I was knackered from the long day I had.

Today, I still wasn't myself but I was feeling a tad better than the past days of agony that I really don't want to think about neither repeat it.

Today I was going to get another tattoo and I knew exactly what I wanted. This tattoo was going to be really special.

Looking down at my arm which still had a bandage on, I frowned. The scars was still there so it means that I have to wear long sleeves or jacket to hide the bandage.

I made a huge mistake doing this. I promised myself that I wouldn't do it again to mum and dad but I broke it but I thought it would be a solution but it never was in the end. I would have been laying on the cold tiled floor, dead.

Luckily Zayn came in time and I'm still here up and breathing. Yesterday was just my first time in a while so there was no need for rehabilitation.

That place scared me out in the beginning but I adjusted to it and learnt that they wanted to help you get better and they never judged.

All the patients bonded together very well as we could understand each other, not like our parents and friends say they 'understand' but deep down they are judging you.

During my time in rehab, I made two friends, Whitney and Andy. Whitney and Andy is two years older than me. They were there before I came and they welcomed me. Whitney was in rehab for alcohol and Andy was in for drügs.

They were really great people. The jokes they made, the silly arguments between the two of them but we had great times together.

Up to this day, we still friends and they are dating which I am so glad. They have been clean for three years which is great.

I feared one thing.

Going back to rehab.

It's not fun and games and this time Andy and Whitney won't be there but besides that, you should learn your lesson the first time you went to rehab but I know I that I didn't need it.

I decided to Skype with Whitney. I haven't chatted to her in a while.

She answered my call. Looking at her surroundings, she was in her bedroom, laying on her bed.

"Alison! Baba! All right on your side?"

One thing about Whitney, she calls you baba.

"I'm not really myself." "Aww. What is going on?" She asked concerned "My father passed away on Tuesday and we burried him yesterday but during that time span, I did something I shouldn't have done."

"I'm sorry to hear that. My condolences to you and the family but what did you do?" I took off my bandage and showed her my biggest mistake. She gasped, putting her hand over her mouth.

"Alison. Two things. One, you got a tattoo?!" She squealed "Yeah. Almost a month ago." "That's rad! Second, how could you do that? You know that you shouldn't be doing that! You have been clean for three years." I sighed.

"I wasn't thinking right Whit but I was going to the point of killing myself." "Oh my god." She whispered "But luckily my boyfriend came in time."

"And you have a boyfriend!? Why don't I know anything about this!" She asked with disappointment "Yes, I have a boyfriend also almost a month."

"That sounds great Alison! I'm glad he came in time! You know that's not going to help. That's going to get you killed and your family doesn't need another death. Your dad doesn't want you do that. Maybe he is not here anymore but that doesn't mean you need to be depressed all the time."