Valentine's Day, 1990. It'll start from here.
Me and my girl don't do anything for the lover's holiday because Paisley Park has already stolen my heart. Guilty—I've been feeling up Studio B all day.
So feeling unappreciated, she calls me up to pick a fight, makes numerous threats I can't take serious and then hangs up on me. But she really hates me after all. By time I make it home in the moonlit hours, she and all her things are gone.
The sting from losing her carries into my dream that night. The setting is in my bedroom where I'm able to make my final plea. But it still ends the same. I'm just forced now to watch her leave.
To clear my weary head, I take a walk. My surroundings don't resemble the true nature around my home, and halfway down the road I question the vacant world around me. This isn't real. Still, I push forward into a thick sheet of fog. Animals call in the distance. Cooing, screeching, and crying—scoring my loneliness.
The haze begins to thin, rewarding me a destination. It's a school. Central High. Congratulations Class of 1976! painted across the hanging banner above the front doors. Smiling, I welcome myself inside my old stomping grounds.
No one. Not a soul in sight. Just me and my echoing footsteps as I make my way to my old locker. But as I reach closer, there's a strange energy becoming more apparent. The dream is curving towards a nightmare, but I keep on. 'Cause I ain't scared of shit.
I make it to the mint green locker. It takes a while to figure out the combination. I almost give up, but I get it. 02-14-90. Of course.
The tall space is packed...with junk. Old dusty books, tennis rackets, three bookbags, towels, two bowling pins. Not how I remember it... But somehow, I find the small pink envelope stashed away in the midst of it all. Nothing marks the front, but inside is a folded piece of paper. It goes something like this:
Prince,
If u BELIEVE then why are u hiding in the sheets with meaningless women? Why are u hiding from ME? Why do u choose 2 run?
She didn't love u. So there's no need for healing. It's just a surface wound. The burn will dissipate before u wake. Just like it always does.
I know u. I know what u're thinking. Now u can pick up Vivian from the airport next week. Now u can consider Anna to live in. She's next in line right?
When u find peace within urself, I hope then we can find each other again.
Until the stars align...take care.
Crazy right? Well it starts on a loop from here. More often now, I meet this sense of longing in my dreams. And that's what's most vivid. The feeling. That's the core of it. Sometimes there'll be a scene around it. Me writing a letter to my mother or father. Me talking to a friend about the one that got away. Even me wandering in an empty world, crossing cities to find...someone. Or anyone? Or her.
Central High was demolished in '82, but I keep going back there in my dreams. Each time I'm rummaging through my locker for another letter but nothing is ever found. So then I wake up missing her—the ghost. The hollowness in my chest is real. There's never anyone in my waking life to fill it, because that person doesn't truly exist. And if she does, I haven't met her yet.
But I'm not really with the idea of settling down anyway. I figure that's what this is all about. Just the quiet space in my brain whispering desires of finding the one. But I'm having just a little too much fun.
Goodness will guide me when u're love is inside me.
Until then, life's a PARADE!
With Anna's cranberry lipstick, I write this on the bathroom mirror one morning. She isn't humored. My intention isn't to offend her. This is honestly just me fighting the dream. Once I'd wake, after about an hour I'd forget all about it, but I'm tired of drifting off to that same void over and over again. So I'm lashing out.
I start staying up longer, neglecting sleep as long as I possibly can. Anna moves in with me. And when she flies back home overseas, Robin stays in her place. Sometimes Carmen. Or Vivian. Or Analia. My mind has been half gone for a very long time. And a part of my heart has vanished with it.
People say what they want, they speculate. But my girlfriends accept me for how I am, whether they want to admit that or not. My lifestyle is no secret. And when they get fed up with it, they'll just leave. And I'll just move on. An unspoken understanding I have with all of them. All good things never last, right?
This is the opening. The "prologue."
April, 1990! We'll move on to there for the first scene, when curiosity brings me to Minnetonka High the last Friday of the month...
...when I see you for the first time on the stage, dressed in all white. A beautiful feline ballerina.
You said you wanted a story. Well here's one. "Based on true events."
Just promise to still not hate me once my story is told.
-Prince, 1992
YOU ARE READING
𝐒𝐢𝐠𝐧𝐞𝐝, 𝐘𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐁𝐢𝐠𝐠𝐞𝐬𝐭 𝐅𝐚𝐧
Fanfiction"A tale of obsession through the eyes of a fanatic." Every tomorrow is a bold question mark for the motherless child Ivy Valentine. But one constant in her life that always offered smiles and hope was purple music. So one day, she decides to write...
