Chapter 4

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"Your baby is what we consider moderate to late-term preemie, which means she was born between 32 and 36 weeks. Most babies in this category are less likely to have severe breathing problems, thanks to some development of lung-maturing surfactant in utero, but they may need help with breathing for a few hours or days. Some may require gavage feeding, but most will be able to nipple-feed. As with any preterm baby, they're still at risk for infections and problems like jaundice, hypoglycemia and hypothermia. So far your baby looks good, she does have assistance breathing for now and might continue with that for a few days but everything else is looking very good."

"So she's gonna be okay?" I asked worriedly.

"Yes, she should be just fine. We'll continue to monitor her progress but she looks good."

"When can I see her?"

"In about 20 minutes the nurses were going to try feeding her, we can come get you and you can try your hand at it."

"Yes, I want to try breastfeeding. 20 minutes." I said excitedly.

"I'll leave you to it, one of the nurses will come get you in 20." he said with a smile.

I sat there anxiously waiting for the 20 minutes to be over and 18 minutes 30 seconds later the nurse walked into the room with a wheelchair. She had a smile on her face and they assisted me to the chair, I was in a lot more pain than I expected to be in. According to the nurse it's all part of the c-section healing process. I really don't care about the pain right now, I just want to see my daughter.

Dom wheeled me to the NICU were the bed that my baby was in was already rolled up next to a cute rocking chair. Looking at the chair I decided that I want one in the nursery as well. It hurt to stand up but I need to start moving on my own, I can't sit down and get comfortable to the stillness. That'll only make recovery longer and more painful.

Standing over the bed I looked at the most adorable little girl. Dark brown hair, that'll probably lighten to my natural light honey brown and the cutest little nose, the most beautiful little pout with the tiniest little fingers and toes. My baby, she looked up at me with wide almond shaped eyes that came from my side of the family and her father's chin.

I could see him in her nose, the shape of her mouth and the sparkle in the eyes. He gave me this chance and I will forever love him for it. Looking up at him, the smile on his face was like nothing I've ever seen before. The look of pure adoration on his face must mirror the look on my face. This moment will never leave my memory.

"Mommy, are you ready to try your hand at breastfeeding?" one of the nurses asked.

"Yes, what do I do?"

They took a few minutes to explain the logistics of it, what to do and what to look out for. Every baby is different is basically what they told me. Some babies take quickly to it and others don't take to it at all. After about 10 minutes I finally got to sit in the rocking chair with my daughter and never in my life have I felt so perfect.

I got comfortable and did everything that they told me to do, taking the notes that they gave me and feeling this immense happiness and pleasure as soon as my baby started suckling. Tears pooled in my eyes once I realized that I was doing this right, it feels right. Dom placed a kiss on my head while he rubbed her cheek and I let the tears fall.

"Well mommy, this baby is unnamed as of yet. Do you have something in mind for her?"

Looking over at Dom I had to think about this, we had spoke about a few different names but nothing stuck. Now with my little girl in my arms, albeit a few weeks early only one came to mind and in that second I knew what her name would be.

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