Sensation (h.s)

Chapter Fifty Two

✺ KATE'S POV  ✺

Around eleven that night, Harry and I find ourselves in another hotel as we were last night. We're somewhere in the middle of the state of Pennsylvania but the city we ended up in at least has a population over five-hundred, unlike the city from last night. 

Harry allowed me to take a shower when we arrived but I know that he stayed close by outside of the door waiting for me to finish. He seems to be constantly worried I'm going to crawl out of some window when he's not looking or maybe dart the other direction the second he takes his eyes off of me. I'm lucky he's even been letting me pee on my own. 

Once we're both back in the room after my shower, we're seated on our respective beds only a few feet apart from each other. I'm thankful for hotels allowing us the option to have two beds in our room so that Harry and I can at least keep the physical distance between us while I continue to try to keep my emotions away from him as well. 

We sit for what feels like hours of silence. Harry turned on some movie on the cable tv across the room to fill in as background noise, but I'm not sure I've paid attention to one word they've said. I've been attempting to get comfortable in the bed while wearing my clothes from earlier but it fails dramatically each time I try to lay down in my jeans. 

"I have, like, clothes you could borrow if you want. I guess we didn't think earlier about getting you anything to sleep in." Harry finally speaks up once he acknowledges my struggle to relax into the bed. 

"I'm fine." I answer back shortly. I throw the hotel bedding over my body and forget about the idea of comfort as I at least try to pretend I'm fine so that Harry won't involve himself into it. 

"Look, I have a pair of gym shorts in my car that you could sleep in. The least I could do for you is make you comfortable if I'm going to keep you here with me." Harry stands from his bed and I watch him move around the room to get his car keys. I don't say anything back to him, but its only because I don't want to admit that he's right. The least he could do for me is make me comfortable while I'm here. 

He returns to the room minutes later with the promised pair of black shorts in his hands. I thank him with a nod before retreating to the bathroom to put them on. They're far too big on me and I have to roll the waistband multiple times to get them to at least stay on my body. 

When I return back to the room, Harrys sitting on the end of his bed and waiting for me. His eyes drop to give me a once over and I immediately cross my arms over my chest to hide the fact that I took my bra off in the bathroom. I know that if we were on different terms he would make some comment about how I look good in his clothes and I'd giggle and tell him to shut up. The comment never comes though and I try to find the relief in it. 

"Are you hungry?" He asks once I've sat back down on my own bed. We're sat facing each other but I've got my legs tucked up tightly to my chest despite him sitting sprawled out in his spot. 

"No." I shrug back at him. My stomach rumbles just at the mention of food and reminds me that it's been rumbling for hours.

"You haven't eaten in two days. You wouldn't even eat breakfast this morning. I know you don't want to be here with me but starving yourself is just going to make it all worse." Harry runs his fingers through his hair and I watch his lips as he talks. He stopped for breakfast this morning at some fast food place and offered to buy me something to eat, but I refused. I did the same thing last night for dinner and I'm paying the price for it all now. My mind keeps telling me I have to refuse every advance from him so that I can at least be in control of something in this situation. He's right though. Being in control of starving myself won't fix anything.