In love with the jerk?! // Sehun

Chapter 18: Complication

Your POV

-

They placed the blue blanket over his body.

Suho was dead.

My jaw dropped and my knees felt weak, unable to support my weight any longer, so I collapsed onto the cold floor.

Tears streamed down my cheeks and I was just there by the door, with my hands covering my mouth.
I felt as if someone was squeezing my heart so tight it could actually burst. Everything around me seemed to blur and the sight of my lifeless best friend was the only thing clear.

The worst part was, I was talking to him yesterday. He was alive and smiling, and now... He was dead.

Aunt and Uncle Kim saw me. Aunt's face had dried up tears on them, like her eyes could not shed any more tears in the loss of her son.

"_____," she called to me.

It only made me cry even harder. She bent down beside me and took me in a tight embrace.

"I was talking to him yesterday," I wailed. "Suho was alive."

"I know, sweetie," she hushed.

I knew I was not related to him, I knew I was not his family but, I felt as if I was the one losing a family member.

Suho was more than a friend to me; he was a brother.

Then, at that moment, I remembered something. Suho had always wanted to be more than friends, more than just a sibling-like relationship, and I knew that. What he said to me yesterday flashed in mind as I stood up and slowly made my way towards the bed.

Gulping down the lump in my throat, my shaky hands reached for the blue covers. Hesitantly, I pulled it open just enough, so I could see Suho's face.

They were pale and thin.

I touched his cheek, which was still a bit warm, but not warm enough to tell me this was all a joke and he was still alive. I bent down close to his face and stared at his angelic face, with my jaw shaking and tears still flowing.

"Yah, I thought I was the one leaving first, huh? Why did you leave before me? Who's going to be my saviour now?"

It was hard. It was really hard watching him lie there, not breathing in nor breathing out.

I shook my head and as bravely as I could be, I leaned towards his right ear. A deep sigh escaped my lips.

"I'll make your wish come true, Suho-ya. I'll grant it for you," I told him, voice a lot shaky from caterwauling.

Then, I brought my face so close to his. I looked at his purple, dying lips and gently, I pressed mine against them.

I closed my eyes and tears fell on his face. Memories from our childhood invaded my mind.

That first day we met in kindergarten.

The day we found out we were in the same middle school.

The day we went to the same high school.

We have been through so much together. Sometimes, I even wondered myself why I did not feel the same way as he did towards me. Maybe it was the thought of not wanting to lose a close friend.

I leaned back slowly and pecked a kiss on his temple. I knew deep inside that if he was still alive, he would not want me to cry over him.

"_____," I heard Aunt call me.

I turned around and saw her walking towards me. She wiped her face before stretching out her hand to me, placing before me a white folded paper.

"This was on the bedside table. I think Suho wrote it for you, _____-ah," she said.

I nodded at her and took the paper from her hand. Looking at it just made me even sadder, but I tried not to cry anymore. I sat on the couch that leaned against the wall and unfolded the paper.

It read: "Dear _____,

I know I startled you with my last wish... You don't have to do that. I don't have a lot of time. By the time you're reading this, I'm gone.

I'm really sorry I left you, that is the last thing I want to do, but I guess this is where my destiny goes.

Just know I will always love you, as a best friend and as more than a friend. You know that, right? I don't blame you for not returning my feelings. In fact, I thank you.

If you felt the same way I would die with a lot of hurt in my heart, but because we are only friends you took away some of that pain.

Please don't cry for me, even at the funeral. I know you are a strong girl; the strongest I have ever met.

Take care of yourself, okay? Especially around that jerk, Sehun. _____, I can't tell you much, but please know what you are doing. I know you are confused at this point, but get to really know him first.

Anyway, I can't write any more. I'll always be here, in your heart.

I just want to say something... I love you, _____.

PS:// I have a favour. Please say my eulogy for me?"

I probably looked like a crazy person nodding at a piece of paper, but I did not care. I felt unusual, though. Suho warned me about Sehun, just like Chanyeol did before. But I shook the thought aside as I looked at the lying Suho on the bed.

"_____," I heard a voice call.

I switched my gaze towards the door and was met by the sight of Sehun, who had his arms crossed while leaning on the door frame.

"Sehun..." I said.

"What did Suho tell you?" he asked.

I looked into his eyes. They were not the usual capturing, melting brown eyes I knew. They pierced right into mine like a predator to its prey.

I gulped as he made his way towards me. My heartbeat quickened with every step he took.

Sehun leaned forward and I had to arch my back to create distance.

"What did he tell you?" he asked me again.

"Why is it so important to you?" I answered back.

Sehun's lip transformed into a smirk before scoffing.

"No reason," he replied.

Liar.

"Let's go," he said, arm reaching out to me.

"But-"

"But nothing," Sehun began. "You can't stay here all day, it's too sad and morbid."

Before I could even think of anything, his hand was already holding mine and we were making our way out the hospital.

"Where are we going?" I asked him.

"Somewhere not sad," he chuckled.

"I think I'll just head home," I told him.

I tried pulling my hand from him, but his grasp seemed to tighten with my every attempt.

"S-Sehun... I need to go," I said, but he gave no response and kept walking.

"Sehun, let me go," I cried.

"NO!" he shouted, turning to face me.

I jumped back in shock and my breathing started to get heavy. My eyes widened as I looked at his face.

"I'm... I'm sorry," Sehun said softly.

He then pulled me in by the neck and held me against his chest. His arms wrapped around my waist and my head rested on his chest.

"I'm sorry, I didn't know what I was thinking," he whispered.

"Well, well, well."

We both pulled away from each other and looked at the person who spoke. Sehun's eyes widened and his jaw dropped.

"Eomma?"