June

31. Picture of a Rice Cake

그림의 떡

It's the dark clouds scattered in the sky that made June regret not bringing an umbrella that afternoon. Gloomy - seemed to be the perfect way to describe the feeling that was both outside and inside of the restaurant she was currently sitting in.

All covered in wood with the windows stretching to the ceiling - the small and pretty, yet unknown place was just around the corner of the district that Jimin picked out to have lunch at.

A place he wanted their first date to be at.

Weirdly enough, June never heard of this place before. So the habit of overanalyzing things overcomes her once again as she starts to think of the reasons why Jimin would insist on picking this restaurant in the first place.

Away from the city, away from the busy streets and loud cars, this small restaurant called Hinata (A sunny place) was cramped and snuggled in between old apartment buildings, in a street so narrow only two to three people could walk through it.

So why here? Why at this weird time of the day, far away from everyone they know?

The only distraction from her thoughts she had was the hushed pop music playing in the background and the synced clacking of forks and knives, digging down the ceramic plates.

That same afternoon, in between each of Jimin's sloppy bites, June learned that he was unbelievably terrible at impressions of his brother's laughter as he was physically demonstrating the one time he despised his own childhood - the time his younger brother Jihyun managed to shove a butterfly inside of his underwear.

At first, she didn't question it, only struggled to keep a straight face as it was safe to say that there were two things Jimin was absolutely terrified of: heights and butterflies.

Which was weirdly adorable and sad at the same time.

And with each second that goes ahead, June's ears are filled with something new, something about Jimin she has never heard before. Piece by piece she would slowly start building the person Jimin seemed to be - a loving brother and a friend, a heavy sleeper and a passionate dancer with a habit of crunching his whole body while laughing relentlessly.

And for a moment, June was mentally checking off the list of questions, except for this one, that was still waiting to be answered.

''Jimin?''

''Hmm?'' He sang, mouth full of food as his chopsticks tapped against the plates.

It takes more than a minute of silence combined with courage for her to push the upcoming words out of her mouth. ''Are you ashamed of me?''

Swallowing deeply, he took a second to think of an answer to give. ''What? Why would I be ashamed of you?''

Because whenever we hang out, it's always at a weird time of the day or somewhere nobody could possibly see us being together.

''I don't know'', she says, blankly staring at a single coffee stain etched on the very corner of the table. ''I just feel like you don't enjoy being with me.''

''Ah idiot, don't be silly.'' The boy smiled, chewing up his food before speaking again. ''Of course, I enjoy the time we spend together. Otherwise, I wouldn't be here with you now, would I?''

Well, he does have a point.

Maybe she was reading between the lines, looking for a meaning that doesn't really exist but what else could she do when something didn't feel right.

''Aren't you going to eat?'' Changing the topic, Jimin diverted his eyes, then scrunched his nose and scratched the back of his head - all of the little movements he does when the words rolling off his tongue were crooked and somewhat heavy.

Head facing the blank table, June's shoulders shrugged as her hands hugged the glass now half filled with water while her fingers tapped against it to a rhythm of the minutes left of this date.

The rest of their lunch played in silence. When they both stood up and left the table, Jimin paid for the food. With his hands reaching the pits of his pockets on the denim jacket wrapped around him, he slowly walked through the entrance door with June following his steps behind.

Now both of them are standing on the street, faces turned towards each other with no words being spoken, when finally, Jimin takes his hand out of his pocket, a box of cigarettes squeezed in between his fingers and a lighter breaking the silence.

A small puff of smoke crawls through Jimin's lips, coating just the air above him.

But June couldn't stand the silence, not this one. Her fists are clenched a little and feet dug into the concrete as if to make sure that her knees won't give up on her.

''Jimin?''

A woosh of air flew between them, carried by a man running away from the clouds above on his old, rusty bicycle.

''Yeah?'' Jimin then replied.

''What are we?''

A question so simple, yet so complicated.

''I mean, you and I. What am I to you? What does this make us?''

For a moment, Jimin was intimidated. His mind seemed to be racing, his tongue unable to form words before he dropped the cigarette on the ground, his black boot putting it out. ''What do you mean? We're just two friends on an afternoon date.''

There it is, the same silence that makes June not wanting to push further as it was all heading to a direction her heart certainly wouldn't be able to handle.

So she just chuckled, somehow convincing herself that she was the only one wanting something more, but it was a rice cake in a picture.

''What did suddenly get you so down?'' Jimin asked, but June pursed her lips in a firm line.

''Oh, it's nothing, really. I realized I haven't brought my umbrella with me.''

''So you better get going then.'' As the corners of his lips curled up in a smile, Jimin's hand reached forward, leaving a soft pat against June's head. ''I'll see you on practice later today, don't be late.''

And while June watched him walk away, it was the raindrops tapping the skin on her face that made her regret not bringing an umbrella that day.

. . .

a/n: thank you for being patient with me and still reading despite the slow updates. you guys are the best! ♡ this story is slowly coming to an end which means, there's going to be a lot of things happening so brace yourselves. i hope this book won't flop & that i won't disappoint you.

also 그림의 떡 (geu-reem-eui dduk) — means "picture of a rice cake" a korean idiom meaning: something you desire, but can't have.