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두근두근
It has been one hundred and twenty drops of water falling down the tap, since the last time June saw Jimin.
Tap, tap, tap. It was the only sound she had been listening to when the TV was put on mute, the pictures just endlessly moving and changing constantly.
Whenever she'd feel stressed or out of place, June would turn on the TV, let the voices speak louder than those inside of her head. And sometimes she'd leave it on, without a sound, only to stare at it for hours and let it wash her brain until early mornings of the day.
She'd tell herself that it was out of boredom, that it'll soon go away. But she has been this way ever since the beginning, maybe even more now than when she was a kid.
Hands dipped in a bag of peanut flavored puffs, the ones she bought at the third store with Jimin, she stared at whatever show there was unfolding in front of her on the screen. The crunching would've made her ears go deaf but that was okay, as long as it's louder than the anxiety leaping from within.
When the commercials come on, she knows it was time to either stand up, get some water or change the channel.
Nowadays though, she just simply stays still and doesn't move, because it sometimes seemed the easiest thing to do.
Tap.
There goes the water again. Annoyingly calming, it tips a spoon inside of the sink, it clanking with the other silverware still waiting to be washed properly.
Tap.
This time it was slower than usual, as if the kitchen tap was running out of water. And then June waited for the third tap. Instead, she heard a different sound, one similar to a thumping heart or a knock against a door.
Pit a pat.
And she was on her feet, turning around as her eyes were looking at a boy, the feeling almost bittersweet.
"Taehyung", her voice wasn't louder than a whisper.
And he, was standing there, showing the boxy smile like he always would. A smile that made things oh so more difficult because June didn't know how to feel, how to react. Should she hug him like they do it in the movies, or should she push him away again like she did last time? All June wanted was to be angry, to feel sad, to feel anything at all. But she was numb, completely still with her feet glued beneath.
The time was so little, so small, that she doesn't get the chance to think more when Taehyung's arms wrapped her whole. He squeezed her so tightly that she could feel the beating of his heart on her own, pumping and pumping, it being just as real as the floor underneath her feet.
''Hey friend'', the boy greeted. And for a moment it felt like things haven't changed at all. ''I missed you.''
The words rolled from his lips, but they sounded empty to her ears. Like the profound reunion of two friends that the situation was supposed to be, each small breath from Taehyung's lungs filled the atmosphere with more regret and more fear.
Until it disappeared, dispersed into the thin air and there was nothing yet again.
