Celestial | Sirius Black Love Story

Chapter Fifteen

The day after I had spoken with Remus was a Monday, and for the first time in a week, I went down to the Great Hall to eat breakfast. Lily or Septima had brought me food over the past week, but I felt ready to be together with people today. I only had one week left at Hogwarts and I had decided to make the most of it.

However, I had woken up very early by nightmares, as I had every morning now, and the Hall was empty when I came down. I had to admit to myself that I was somewhat relieved. It was better to face people gradually then walk into a wave of sympathy and worried looks. 

I had just helped myself to oatmeal with banana, sugar, and milk - something my mother had often made me - when I heard footsteps echoing towards the Hall. I looked up to see Sirius' familiar face bobbing into view and swallowed. It seemed such a long time ago since I had been worried over whether or not I like him, and whether he returned those feelings or not. His face lit up when he saw me, and a managed a small smile as he came and sat down opposite me.

He opened his mouth, obviously trying to find something to say. I hadn't seen him since the charms exam. Finally, he said, "What the bloody hell are you eating?"

I looked down at my bowl and back at him, "Oatmeal, banana, milk, and sugar." I replied plainly, not understanding what the problem was.

"Oatmea- Ollie, you have the choice of bacon, pancakes, jam, everything, and you chose oatmeal. You really are something, aren't you?" He said incredulously, laughing and shaking his head incredulously at me.

"Yes, I did. I really am what?" I replied, looking at him steadily. Again, it felt nice doing something normal, like having banter with Sirius.

"Well," He blushed slightly, "Something special." He muttered.

"Well, imagine how dull things would be if I weren't." I said, trying to stop myself from blushing.

"I can't." He replied, this time his voice was clear and steady and he looked at me seriously. This time I couldn't stop the heat from flushing over my face.

"Ollie, I'm so so-"

"Don't" I interrupted him, "If you say you're sorry, I will actually rip your fingernails off. It's such a stupid thing to say."

He looked taken aback for a moment, then said, "I agree. I think it's ridiculous for apologising over a situation you had no control over, but I wanted to apologise for not being there for you this week."

I was silent for a moment, "I didn't want anyone near me. I wouldn't have let you."

"I just-" he hesitated, "It hurts me knowing-" again, "I want you to know that I'm here for you if you want anything, and that if you don't write to me I will send you howlers until you do."

I smiled and said, "I'll send you letters." I couldn't think of anything else to say but was spared having to think of anything when Remus walked into the room and smiled widely as he came and sat down next to me and gave me a huge hug.

The rest of the day passed quite smoothly, none of my friends fussed over me, I suspected Remus had told them all to treat me normally, but the boys tried extra hard to make me smile, and the girls got me anything I asked them for. Around two, I left classes to go and sit by the lake for a bit, feeling tired, and Remus came with me in case I needed someone to talk to or a shoulder to cry on.

Then the rest of the week passed in quite a similar fashion, I joined in more and more but wandered off to the lake when I felt overwhelmed, and Remus only ever left my side when I went to bed in the evenings. I had started to sleep in the same bed as Septima, I found that my nightmares were easier to handle when I was in her proximity and she always calmed me down with a softness and patience I could hardly understand.