so i wrote this at the end of freshman year, about like 6 months ago i think and i was gonna try and make it a henry imagine but it didn't work like that but i still wanna share it with you all, so i hope you enjoy it lolol.
TRIGGER WARNING!!! mentions of suicide and murder pls read w caution
I remember when I first saw her. She walked in the room and time stopped. It was like a movie; everything was in slow motion. Her hair was blowing back like there was a fan blowing on her. I swear I saw her eyes twinkle in the light. Everything about her was perfect. There was something about her that drew me in, which was extremely rare for me. I was just the shy, quiet, nerdy kid who sat in the front of every class and answered all the questions but never talked anywhere else because I had no friends.
She sat next to me, because it was the only seat that was open. She smiled at me. It wasn't a real smile though, it was like one of those smiles that you give when you pass someone on the street and you both make awkward eye contact for too long. It wasn't anything to her, but it was everything to me.
One time a few weeks later she dropped her pencil. I was quick to reach for it and hand it to her. She gave me the same smile and muttered a "thanks". Again, it wasn't much, but it was enough to make my heart skip a beat.
I remember the following week I learned her name. I glanced over at her paper before she turned it in. Not to cheat, obviously. I didn't need to. I just wanted to know her name. Hazel Caulfield. Her name was beautiful, but it'd be better if she had my last name. Hazel Andrews. Yeah, I liked that better.
It didn't take long for me to fall in love with her. Everything about her just drew me in. Her smile was blinding. Her laugh was a sweet song. Her eyes held the stars. Her smell was intoxicating. And she loved me too. I just know it.
It didn't matter what anyone said. It was me and her against the world. I didn't need anyone except her. She didn't need anyone except me.
The first night I spent the night at her house was one to never forget. I was surrounded by her smell. I didn't actually get to sleep, but I didn't care. She looked peaceful, and that's all I cared about. I had to leave earlier than I wanted though, because her eyes began to flutter and she began tossing and turning.
The next day when I saw her at school all I could think about was how beautiful she was when she was sleeping, and how she should really lock her window because I didn't want someone creepy coming in and spying on her. Or worse; taking her from me.
She cheated on me a lot with a guy named Adam Walsh. It angered me, I'll admit. But it wasn't her fault. Adam was the boy everyone guy wanted to be and every girl wanted to be with, except my Hazel. Hazel wanted me. But Adam blackmailed her. He forced her into doing things with him. He wanted everyone to think she was with him and not me. Maybe it was also to save her image. I wouldn't blame her. No one would think Corey Andrews would score Hazel Caulfield. But I did.
Hazel never walked with me in the hallways. She never sat with me at lunch either, or talked to me in school at all. She was always with Adam. I caught her cheating on me plenty of times. She'd be kissing Adam goodbye before class, holding hands with him at lunch, sitting with him in class. It made me jealous. He was stealing my precious Hazel away from me.
Now, I know it's confusing. You might be wondering how I know Hazel loved me if she was cheating on me. It's because I love her. I love her with everything I have. I know she appreciates the little things I do for her, like the notes I'd leave in her locker or on her car. They were usually things I loved about her. Sometimes they were poems I'd write her.
I also know she loved me because of how she always left her window unlocked for me. So I could come in and check on her while she was asleep. I had the passwords to all of her things. All of her things. Social media accounts, her phone, her laptop, everything. It was a trust thing. If she posted something too revealing, or something that I didn't want anyone else to see, I would delete it for her. She always seem confused and didn't understand why her pictures were disappearing though. I guess she forgot I had full control over her accounts.
The first item of clothing she had given me was ordinary. She gave me the shirt she was wearing the first time I ever saw her. The next day though, I heard her ask Adam if he took it. She didn't have the best memory.
I loved coming home and going into my room. My walls were full of pictures of her. Some were off guard pictures I'd take of her when she wasn't looking, because she looked most beautiful when she wasn't trying. Some were pictures I had taken off her social media. Some were ones I'd saved before I deleted them from her accounts, the ones I didn't want anyone else to see, like bikini pictures.
I'd taken down all my posters to make room for my pictures of her, and I still ran out of space on my walls. I had frames and frames full of pictures of her on my dresser and on my nightstand and my desk. My whole life was dedicated to her. I knew I was put on this earth to be with her, and she to be with me.
I was the perfect boyfriend. I sent her flowers. Anonymously, because it was more exciting that way. Even though I know she knew it was me, she had to. I had a box of her things she'd given to me. Clothes, pictures, memos like gum wrappers and things that held memories to us. I kept it under my bed.
I had never understood what it meant to love someone. I didn't get what people meant when they said they felt sparks at someone's touch, or fireworks at someone's kiss, or butterflies at someone's words. It didn't make sense until I met Hazel. There was nothing about her I didn't love. I needed her. It was like suddenly, I didn't need to eat or sleep or breathe, I just needed Hazel.
I didn't blame Adam for wanting to be with her. I knew everyone wanted to be with her. But I did blame him for trying to steal her from me. I blamed him for forcing her to fake happiness around him. I blamed him for being the reason she pretended not to notice me at school, or the reason she didn't call me at night before bed. He wasn't a good person like me. He wasn't going to give her everything I could. No one would ever give her what I could. I know she knew that deep inside. I think she was scared, scared of what Adam would say, or that her parents would tell her she could do better. She cared about what other people thought, that was for sure.
I'll never forget the night that changed everything. I was going to check on Hazel, like I did every night. Only this time she wasn't asleep, and she wasn't alone.
Adam was there with her. They were laying in her bed together. They were just laying there. She was laughing at something he said.
They weren't doing anything bad, but I knew it was only a matter of time before he tried to force her into doing something she didn't want to do. I needed to save her, and I needed to act fast if I was going to do it. I looked around to make a quick plan. They both had their backs to me. If I managed to quietly get in, I could save her. I slowly lowered myself into her room from the window. I reached for my pocket knife and army crawled towards the bed. With one quick motion I raised my hand over my head and stuck the knife into Adam's neck. Hazel screamed as blood poured from his neck, all over her, me, and her bed.
"Shh, you're safe now. You're safe." I whispered to her. She looked at me with panic in her eyes.
"Who are you?" She asked. I laughed. There goes her memory again.
"Hazel, baby, it's me." I said. Tears were running down her face. She got a look that made it look like she was remembering something.
"You," she whispered. "You're who keeps sending me notes, and taking my stuff! It wasn't Adam, you're crazy." She said. I was confused.
"No, I'm not crazy. We're in love. Your memory is messed up." I reminded her but she still didn't remember. She was breathing so heavily it must have hurt. "Calm down please, you'll hurt yourself." I mumbled to her.
She ran a hand through her messy hair. She grabbed her phone and dialed 911.
"Don't do that! Stop!" I yelled at her and tried to grab the phone but she ran and locked herself in the bathroom. I was angry now. I repeatedly hit her door over and over again.
"Hello, yes, my name is Hazel Caulfield, I'm seventeen years old, I'm in my house right now my, my parents are gone. Out of town for a business trip. Someone just broke into my home and killed my boyfriend. I think he's been stalking me for a while." I heard her say messily. Her words were jumbled and slurred. I looked over at Adam on the floor. His lifeless eyes remained open. Blood was no longer pouring.
I walked over to him and crouched down. "She is mine. I love her." I whispered, raising my hand to shut his eyes.
I sat there outside of her bathroom door, listening to her panicked breaths and choked sobs.
"I did it for you. I love you." I said through the door.
"No! I don't even know you! I sat by you in class because it was the only open seat, you psychopath!" She screamed, beating on the door from the other side. I felt my heart send a flash of hurt through my body.
"That isn't true, Hazel. You know that." I said. "You love me. You always have and you always will. The universe put us together."
"The universe didn't do anything for us!" Her voice was laced with anger. It was bitter.
"There is nothing crazy about me loving you!" I yelled back, kicking the door. I heard her gasp, a reaction of fear. Just then I heard a very loud knock on the door. It was the police.
When no one answered the door, they kicked it in.
"Hello? Anyone here? It's the police!" They called. I backed away into the corner.
"In here, come quickly please!" Hazel yelled. Heavy footsteps raced down the hallways, getting louder and louder as they approached the room.
They busted through the door. There were three of them. Two of them came and quickly picked me up, putting me in handcuffs immediately. The other one got Hazel, and told her it was safe.
It had always been safe. I was never going to hurt her.
I looked her in the eyes as they restrained me. "I just wanted you to myself." I said as they took me away.
They didn't care about what I had to say about it. They took me straight to the loony bin. I'm not crazy. I was never crazy.
No one listens to me here. I sit alone. They treat me like I am nothing.
Hazel never comes to see me. She never writes me. She acts like I don't exist. I think it's because it hurts her too much to know she sent me here. She thinks I'm mad at her. But I forgive her. True love always forgives.
But I can't stay in here another minute. If I can't be with Hazel, I don't want to be anywhere at all. This is the last thing anyone will ever hear from me. Whoever finds this first, send it to my sweet Hazel.
Goodbye, my love. I will never forget all of the times we shared. I know you still think about me every day. I can feel it. We will meet again one day. I love you more than there are stars in the sky and people on the earth. Never forget me.
With Love, Corey Andrews
