Book I: I'll Be Your Melody

Chapter 15

Flashback four years ago

Seoyeon POV

I look at the contract in my hand, finally I would be able to fulfill my dream. I just signed a management contract with a prominent Paris Modelling Agency. I feel so ecstatic, I can't contain my happiness.

I reach for my phone, I wanted to tell my boyfriend right away, but then again, he's probably working in his studio now. Knowing Hyunsik, he won't answer any calls when he's working.

It's the only thing we always argued about. He cannot be disturb when he is working, even when I am the one calling him.

He's the perfect boyfriend, handsome, came from a rich and prominent family. A perfect gentleman. Any girl would envy me. He always put me first, except when it comes to his Music.

Whenever I visits him in his studio, he would sometimes ignore me and even forget I was there in the first place. We would always fight about it, I always feel like I am competing with his music.

There was a time when I was in his studio when I tried to press some keys on his keyboard as I was getting bored. He got annoyed and told me not to touch anything.

I know he love me, we've been together since middle school. He's always been a part of my life, from my ups and downs, from all my failures and success.

I tried to understand him, its his passion, he supports me with what I love too. So instead of making him choose, I learned to adjust with his work, though sometimes I still get annoyed when I have to wait for him.

Like today... I wanted to celebrate with him, but I know he's busy, he's working on BTOB's upcoming album.

I sent a text to him to come to my place for dinner tonight.

He came late, I almost fell asleep when I heard the doorbell. He was apologetic and hug me tight.

"I miss you so much Hon." he said as he hugged me tight.

I melt as always.

I reheat the food, I don't each much as I have to diet, the food I bought are all for him. I am having salad instead, while he eats the meat I prepared for him.

He talked about the latest song he's working with Ilhoon, one of his friends and member of BTOB. He said the pitch is too high that the vocal lines are complaining. He said Ilhoon doesn't care, because he's not the one singing the high notes.

I get lost whenever he talked about music. I get that its his passion, but sometimes I want to talk about me, about us.

Sometimes I wonder how we last this long. I sometimes wonder if I still love him or am I just hanging on to the first love I ever knew.

But whenever I look at him, smiling at me, my heart beats fast. My heart would tell me I love this guy, whenever he smile at me, everything makes sense.

He looked at me and called my name, apparently I spaced out. I must have thought too much.

"So what are we celebrating? I didn't forget any anniversary or date right?"

I laugh at him, because he do sometimes forget, typically guy.

"Hon, Congratulate me." I said beaming at him.

"Congratlations, Yey?" he obliged while looking puzzled.

"I finally did it Hyunsik-ah!!! I'm going to Paris!!" I said to him excitedly.

He dropped his chopsticks, his reaction was far from what I am expecting. He doesn't seem excited, he seemed mad.

"Paris?"

"Yes, I signed a three you contract with Image Models."

"You signed without even discussing it with me?"

He is mad! And so am I!

"You know it's my dream! I thought you'd be happy for me!"

"What about us?"

"What do you mean? I'm going to Paris, it's not like I won't be coming back!"

"I can't believe you decided to go without telling me!" he said raising his voice.

By this time we were both shouting already. We never had this kind of fight before.

"God! Hyunsik, its just three years, you can visit me, I can go back on holidays, we can do skype or face time!"

"You know I don't believe on those things!"

"You won't even notice me gone Hyunsik, you're always stuck in your studio!"

"So now you're blaming my music again? You know I have to focus so I can prove that I can be good with what I do without my father's name."

"I know Hyunsik, I know. I tried to understand you! But this is important to me! This is my dream!"

"What about me?"

"What do you mean? Of course you are important to me too!"

"If I asked you to stay, would you?" he looked at me with pleading eye.

I know I might say Yes if I continue to look in his eyes. I wanted to stay with him. I want to be with him always.

"If you go, there's no turning back, its over!"

"I love you Hyunsik, you know I do. But this is my dream! I'm sorry!" I said to him crying.

He stood up from his chair, he took his coat and left.

I cried the whole night, I cried for the man I love that I'm about to lose. I cried for my dream that I may or may not give up.

*******

The next few days, I process the documents I need, pack my things, settle my remaining commitments in Korea.

We never talked, I don't know what's happening to him, he never called. I tried calling him, he's not answering any of my calls.

Few days after, Changsub oppa came to see me. He begged me to see his brother. He told me Hyunsik locked himself in his studio, he's not talking, he's always drunk and he barely sleeps. He's miserable.

Changsub oppa begged me not to leave his brother. I almost gave up on my dream, but I know this is what's best for us.

"I'm sorry Changsub oppa, I can't."

I left my home country and leave for my dreams. I left the first and probably the only man I will ever loved. I hope and I pray that one day when we reached both our dreams, he would still love me.