Butterfly || ĸooĸv

forty two

It's been a whole week now since the loss of their son and also a whole week since Taehyung gave birth. They just got out of the hospital a few days ago and Taehyung was on bed rest until he felt he could move around since he did have a major incision on his stomach. Since they got home, Taehyung had been laying in the room, not eating nor was he doing anything with their newborn.

It was the same in the hospital. Taehyung didn't want to hold Cheonsa nor look at her. It hurt? and he knew he shouldn't feel like that but he just couldn't help but feel like so. It was saddening and Jungkook didn't want to push him to do so but it's been a week. Not only was he pushing him and the kids away but he was also not eating. Jungkook was more than worried honestly.

Jungkook buttoned up the onesie he put on Cheonsa and kissed her cheek while holding her small hand. "my sweet sweet baby, are you hungry?" He listened to her whines as he carefully picked up Cheonsa and made his way to the kitchen. As he did so, he saw Taehyung walking out of the bathroom. "Hey babe, you need help?" Jungkook asked.

Not even a glance, Taehyung went back into their room and shut the door. A sigh came from Jungkook as he kissed Cheonsa's forehead and went over to make a bottle. Meanwhile, TayJa came out of her room and was laying on the couch soon enough. It's not like Jungkook wasn't used to this stuff. He raised Tayja alone but it was weird feeling like he was raising Cheonsa alone too.

"Dada?" TayJa spoke and Jungkook hummed in response as he warmed the bottle up, Cheonsa being a bit fussy in his arms. "Why is mommy always in the room?" She asked and Jungkook looked at TayJa with a saddening look. "Mommy is not feeling well baby, he'll feel better soon, okay?" Jungkook looked at the female.

TayJa played with the doll in her hand before nodding and looking at the tv that had cartoons on. Jungkook looked at the two before frowning. "He'll get better soon, it'll pass." He mumbled to himself. It's not like he wasn't hurting as well, he just had to remind himself he had two other daughters to care for because if he wasn't going to care for them, who would?

Of course he wished his son was there and of course he was broken from within but he had to move on and take care of the two he has now. Jungkook also had no idea how to help Taehyung. He has no idea what to say or do honestly and that hurts him. It hurts him because he can't help his love. A cry came from Cheonsa and that's when Jungkook snapped out of it.  "Okay, okay shh." he smiled while putting the bottle in Cheonsa's mouth and watching her start sucking. He leaned on the counter and looked at TayJa, oh how the feeling of being the only parent caring for the child was familiar.

That night, Jungkook put down both of the girls and was now laying next to Taehyung who was on his phone. Jungkook pursed his lips before moving closer and pulling the male into a hug. Taehyung only pushed Jungkook away and moved away as well, turning his back to face him. Jungkook sighed as he moved to the edge of the bed.

Jungkook laid there, looking at the two cribs in the room. Only one was being used and the other was just how it was when he first put it up, including the blue teddy he bought a few days before Taehyung gave birth. With that, he shut his eyes and was drifting off to bed, Meanwhile with Taehyung, the male looked at the photos of his son. Tears flowed as he looked at the picture. Never had he felt so broken, never had he felt so lost. He knew he should be happy, since he did have Cheonsa to raise along with TayJa and a wonderful boyfriend.

Though, it hurt. It hurt knowing he couldn't bring both his babies home. Knowing he couldn't raise Haneul and hold him close. It just hurt too much. Taehyung knew he should be parenting Cheonsa with Jungkook but he couldn't bring himself to which just added more pain into the whole situation.

Taehyung looked at Jungkook after turning to face him. Taehyung sniffled, looking at the peaceful male. "I'm sorry.." He whispered as he gripped onto the pillow. With that, Taehyung turned away and was falling into a deep sleep. The night consisted of Jungkook getting up to feed Cheonsa as Taehyung would lay there, looking at the dresser in front of him. Yet Jungkook didn't bring himself to care anymore.

The next morning, Taehyung's mother came into the apartment. "Nanny!" TayJa yelled as she ran over and went hug her. Taehyung's mom smiled and kissed her forehead. "He's in the room, I tried but he just got mad." Jungkook sighed. That morning they planned to take Taehyung to see Serenity but Taehyung didn't know they had that planned. He just assumed it was a visit to the doctors.

Once Taehyung saw his mom enter the room, he sighed and turned the other way. "Taehyung, I know you're hurting and I know this is a tough time but you need to get up. C'mon, get up." She pulled the covers off Taehyung. "Stop it." Taehyung tried to grab the blanket but his mother held the blanket with a firm grip. "Let's go Taehyung." She demanded and Taehyung rolled his eyes before slowly getting out of bed. He put on a baggy sweatshirt but left his pj pants on and slowly left the room. "Mommy!" TayJa went hug Taehyung's legs.

Taehyung looked down at TayJa and gulped. The male looked at TayJa for a moment before smiling lightly and brushing her hair back. "You need your shoes love." He spoke and TayJa nodded before running off to get her shoes on. Jungkook gulped while looking at Taehyung but put Cheonsa in the car seat and was securing her before heading out with Taehyung and the rest.

Once Taehyung got to the children's hospital, he teared up and didn't waste a minute to hurry off to see his sister. Jungkook and Taehyung's mother were a bit behind due to the kids but once they entered the room, they found Taehyung crying while hugging Serenity who was looking way better than before.

"Mommy, brother is crying." Serenity sniffled. Jungkook put the car seat down in front of him once he was was sitting down on a chair with TayJa sitting next to him. "I know baby." She gave a small sad smile as she went rub Taehyung's back. "S-She remembers?" He asked.

"Go on TayJa." Taehyung's mother spoke. "Guess what brother?" She pulled away and wiped Taehyung's tears. Taehyung only hummed and smiled a bit. Serenity giggled and leaned in to whisper into her brothers ear. "I got no more cancer." She pulled away with yet another giggle.