I woke the next morning in agony. My knees were sore and sensitive even to the touch of the soft cotton sheets; my back and shoulders were stiff; my head was throbbing, and my mouth was crying out for water. It was strange because despite all of that, I felt nothing but ecstasy. I stretched my aching body and turned my head; Ronit was next to me, sleeping on her back, her hair smothering the pillow. The duvet covered her bottom half, but her chest was exposed. Goosebumps had settled over her and her nipples were stiff. I touched her breastbone lightly with my fingertips; she was cold, so I brought the quilt up to her neck. She sighed, and her mouth moved, but then she was deep asleep again.
I watched her for a moment. Once again, trying to absorb every minute, every moment. Because I'd very recently realised that no matter how many times she told me she loved me, no matter how much she told me that she wouldn't leave... I couldn't expel the fear that one day I'd lose her again. It had cropped up, and I hadn't been able to shake it. Ronit turned her head and groaned slightly so I left her, thinking me being awake was disturbing her.
I tied my robe around me and went to the kitchen, filling the coffee machine with grounds and rubbing my neck. I poured myself a glass of water and downed the entire thing, it cooled my stomach. I was a bit dizzy, and probably hungover... I tried to remember the night before as clearly as I could. The studio, the strap-on, the shoot. I felt fuzzy when I recalled that; Ronit's face when she'd seen me, the noises she'd made when I'd been inside her. I'd never understood that phrase before, fuzzy... but now I was experiencing it firsthand, the feeling of being wrapped in wool. Then, as though a fast-moving grey cloud passed over my vision I suddenly felt an odd emotion, like guilt mixed with sadness. Why was I feeling that? Where was this stemming from?
I clawed at my memory, what had happened before the studio? Ronit had said something, about Beth. The feeling intensified and I knew that was the source of the discomfort in my stomach. Why had she mentioned Beth? We'd been kissing, why would she have mentioned Beth at that point? I was still questioning myself when I heard a light tread behind me. I turned, went to speak but had to catch my breath.
'Good mor-' I gulped. 'Oh...'
Ronit stood there, entirely naked and smiling dozily.
'Good morning beautiful.' She walked towards me and kissed me. Her fingers loosened the knot around my robe.
'Did I wake you?' I asked, in between her light kisses.
'No,' she kissed my chin and my jaw, just under my ear. I shivered as her warm hands moved over my breast.
'What're you doing?' I asked, a small chuckle accompanied my words.
'I was just thinking,' her mouth moved down my neck; she bent her knees and lowered herself. 'We've done it in almost every room in the house.' She was kneeling in front of me now, her mouth kissing my stomach and one of her hands reaching inside the robe to support my back. 'It seems a shame,' her kisses moved down. 'To waste the opportunity.'
Her mouth enveloped me, and I stumbled into the counter, my hand gripping the side as I gasped. Her tongue was hot and energetic. Flicking and sucking without breath, she moaned as I did. One of my hands grabbed the back of her head.
'Ronit.' I whispered. The coffee machine bubbled away behind me as her feverish tongue slid over my clit. 'Oh- god-'
My back knocked against the cupboards as her mouth devoured me. Her hands had moved to the back of my thighs, pulling me closer. I wanted to lay down because my knees felt like they would give up. I bent double over her, holding her head, a nerve in my leg trembled in time which each roll of her tongue and pucker of her lips.
'Ronit,' I spoke again, my voice shaking. 'I have to... I'll collapse.'
She heard me, even though her ears were buried in between my thighs. She stopped for a moment and looked up at me. She got to her feet and lifted me seamlessly, as though I was light as air, onto the side. Her mouth was open and breathing hard, our eyes met, and we kissed. Her mouth was wet and needy, and I couldn't help but moan when I felt her soft hand moving in between my legs. She pushed my thighs apart and her fingers stroked me. She worked her wrist as she slid inside me, I couldn't contain myself. I was gasping for air, breathlessly respiring into her mouth as my lips trembled against hers. I was still so sensitive from the night before, I almost started crying.
