My Heart Beats For You // Alice Cullen

31. The Absence Of A Heart

I brush my short hair down gently, trying to make it look messy but neat. I'm still trying to get used to the short length; why do I always abuse my hair when I have a crisis? I look down as my phone rings for the 100th time in the last few days, the picture of Parker and I flashing up. I turn it over and let it ring, still not answering him.

"Are we ready?" Rose says as she comes in.

I look up and nod, grabbing my jacket. "Hmm."

"OK, what's the deal?" She crosses her arms. "You've been in a funk for like 3 days now, this isn't just you sulking about dress shopping. Why won't you tell anyone?"

"Alice knows." I shrug simply.

Alice, like me, is upset with Parker. He acted in a childish manner and maybe I'm a little childish for getting upset but so be it. He had a party, didn't invite me, didn't return my calls, didn't tell me anything going on. Yeah, I didn't tell him about the wedding but I called him the moment I proposed - he was off somewhere auditioning when that happened - and I called him when Alice and I got back together, I called him when mom left. The point is, it hurts because he went behind my back and hid things from me. For heavens sake, we're almost 21, not 12.

"Great, so can I know?" She demands.

"No." I grab my coat and slip it in. "Now come on before I choose the dress myself."

She huffs and we head to her car, driving out of town. I do want a dress for the ceremony, a proper one, but right now I'm just not in the mood. I always imagined Parkers advice when picking my wedding dress and I always pictured him as my bridesman.

Rosalie glances over. "Is it your mom?" I huff. "Okay no. Is it Ronnie?" I raise an eyebrow. They all know I've not heard from my family since the proposal. "Okay... Oh no. Parker?" She realises.

I sigh. "Bingo."

"What did he do?" She frowns.

"It doesn't matter, please don't ruin any remaining energy I got." I run my fingers through my hair and climb out the moment I can, taking a deep breath of fresh air.

Rosalie follows suit and locks the car. "I'm sure whatever happened can be fixed?"

I shrug. "I just don't want to talk to him right now." I follow her inside. I freeze in the doorway, staring at all the dresses. "Oh god this is worse than that dance..." I whisper. The four walls are lined with hundreds of dresses, the store seemingly stretching miles back. Sectional racks line the floor too, making it a maze of lace, tulle and beading.

Rosalie grins a little. "Oh this could be such a good distraction for you. C'mon." She pulls me to one of the consultants. Immediately she begins to say what she has in mind. "I was thinking a small bal gown, lace, spaghetti straps, definitely white-"

"Most definitely not." I say.

Rosalie looks at me. "You have to wear white it's traditional-"

"Sweetie, I'm a lesbian who eloped. Nothing about Alice or I is traditional." I smirk a little for the first time in days.

The consultant, a petite redhead, giggles a little. "Is this your sister or something?"

"Sister in law - don't think I could handle being blood related." I tease. Rose just growls lowly.

"Okay, tell me what you have in mind." The consultant asks.

I think for a moment. "Not white. Maybe ivory but not white. And I think I want sleeves. Lace. Nothing with too much beading." I smile. "Rose can choose just one for me to try on just to humour her."