Goodbye is just the beginning

Reap what you sow

Logan clenches the letter in his fist and takes off in a mad dash to the elevators. Surely this c ouldn't be... No, she wouldn't leave him, would she? Omg what if she did leave what if I get to the room and she is gone never to be found? I need her, I don't just want her I NEED her... She is my reason for being and now she's gone? No... No... It can't be it has to be a mistake! Why the hell won't this elevator move faster?! I know when I get to the room she will be lying in bed asleep with her chocolate brown hair falling like a halo around her face on her pillow just like it is every morning. OH, GOD, please! Please let this be like every other night when I go to bed, and she is there laying in my arms. I can't lose her... I WON'T lose her. I almost lost her once and I never want to feel that pain again.

After what seems like a lifetime on this elevator the doors finally open to our hall. My heart is thundering in my ears as I approach our room door. I tentatively pull my key card from my pocket and slide it into the card slot. I screw the damn thing up twice and get the red light. Finally it beeps signaling I had succeeded in unlocking it. I open the door and slowly make my way inside toward the area where our bed is. I feel my chest tighten and the pain floods my body as I look on to see an empty bed and her overnight bag is now missing.... I drop to my knees unable to move... I can hear something, but it's just a distant noise in the back of my mind as once again I realize my entire world has crumbled in just a few short hours...

I feel myself being shook and faintly someone saying my name, but I can't hear real words. Nothing matters right now. The love of my life just walked away and took my entire world with her. I can't say I blame her... especially after the way she has been treated tonight. I know she said she forgave all of us, but if I were her I can't say that I would. I probably would have left and not even left a note. This is my grueling reality that my life is now a void of emptiness. I know if Rory wants to disappear she knows how, and now she has the open means to do so. At one time, I could have bet on finding her at Lorelai's or even through Christopher's, like how the girls found her. But now I have no idea how I will ever find her if she doesn't want to be found...

I feel something shaking me vigorously and it pulls from my thoughts. I turn to see my friends standing there with sorrowful looks. "Hey mate, we need to wake her dad and grandmothers to tell them what has happened. Perhaps, one of them has an idea of how to find her or where she might be going. Don't worry, we will find her." Finn says trying to console his anguished friend and brother.

"STOP FINN, Just STOP! All of you get the hell out of here, I just want to be alone. If Rory wanted to be found, she would be laying in that damn bed right in front of me! She is proving she doesn't! She doesn't want me, she doesn't want this life! And you know what? It's for the best! She has the means to take care of her and the babies. She doesn't need me and my bullshit or my families bullshit stressing her out. Everything is just better this way," I say feeling defeated. As I'm saying this, I'm not sure who I am trying to reassure...myself or my friends.

Finn looks at me incredulously and snaps, "You didn't believe that as you were saying any more than any of us did hearing it!  Quit being such an ass. She loves you and you love her. So what if tonight was stressful? Did you ever think she just needs a few hours to think and breathe? She has been yelled at, and berated since they all showed up to the hotel after dinner. I know if I was in that position I would need to be alone for a while as well! But she also needs you! She needs to know you understand and stand with her. If you give up on her this time, then you really don't deserve her. Maybe, just for once, instead of acting like your world is ending, put yourself in her shoes. Think of HER feelings more than your own. So, what are you going to do? Sit here and feel sorry for yourself or move Heaven and Earth to find the woman you love that just so happens to be carrying your unborn children?"