The GIRL in the YELLOW summer dress

Part 23 - Feelings

ARNAV

As soon as I arrived back home from the dinner at Shrey's, I decided I wasn't going to stay here anymore, it was just getting difficult by the day to stay away from Khushi.

When I tried, Shrey would drag me back, and at times my heart would, I was tired of trying to make my mind understand the fact that whatever I felt for Khushi was completely wrong.

I reminded myself what had happened to me, and I was about to do the same thing to my own best friend, I had been through that pain and I never wished it for my worst enemy and Shrey here was my best friend, I wasn't obviously going to hurt him.

I knew it was going to be difficult to convince Shrey, we were business partners and I couldn't just shift to another city randomly and leave him to handle everything on his own, I dint even know if he was going to agree or not.

I sat on my bed as I looked around, I wanted to pack right away and just run away but I couldn't do that, Shrey already had the stress about Khushi's illness, I dint want to add him more stress by just disappearing and leaving all the work for him, I dint want him to be running to office every now and then when he was supposed to be with Khushi.

Only if, Aria hadn't ever come into our lives, things would have been way different, neither would Shrey go abroad, nor would I have to live with Khushi and neither of us would have doubted on Shrey and the feelings wouldn't have just developed.

It was funny how one day, a girl came into our lives wearing a yellow summer dress and changed everything, if someone had told me something like this was ever going to happen before it happened, I would have seriously laughed at them.

I changed and headed to sleep but all I did for the rest of night was to toss and turn around trying to think how I was going to tackle the situation.

*****

I was woken up early in the morning by a call from Shrey informing me that he was taking Khushi to the hospital and that I had to head to the office and handle the work.

Thankfully he dint tell me to join him at the hospital, not that I dint care about Khushi, I did, more than anything else and deep down inside my heart I was yearning to be around her, to be with her for the treatment and assure her that everything was going to be okay and she was going to be fine but we both knew that it wouldn't be the right thing to do.

I took my shower, got dressed and headed straight to the office, Shrey and I had been so busy with other things, we had a lot of work pending which I had to finish up with, it was going to be a busy day.

I settled down in my cabin in front of the huge pile of files and documents I had to sort, even looking at them made me feel lazy.

I picked up a file and started to work but after every few minutes, suddenly Khushi's thought would cross my mind.

I just hoped she was going to be okay, I hoped she was going to fight cancer strongly and be as okay as before.

I so much wanted to be by her at this time, I wanted to sit beside her and hold her hand tightly into mine, I wanted to look her into the eyes and assure her that everything was going to be fine, I knew she must be scared, so I just wanted to be there for her.

For a moment I even stood up from my desk ready to go to the hospital to be with her, but then I stopped myself, it was difficult, it was a war between my mind and my heart.

My heart was pulling me towards Khushi and my mind was pulling me back, giving me a reality check that she was my best friend's wife and I was just someone who had come in between them in their love story.

I punched the wall angrily as I sat back on my chair, I wasn't going to feel okay until Shrey informed me that everything went well, my bad luck was that I couldn't even call him and ask him about Khushi, it wouldn't be the right thing to do.

*****

KHUSHI

I sat outside feeling nervous and scared, according to Aria, I was supposed to have my first chemotherapy session today and Shrey was inside the cabin busy discussing about it to her.

I was too scared to even talk or listen anything about it, I dint know if it was going to hurt, or anything, I dint even know if it was going to work or not.

I mean of course it wasn't the only session I was going to have, there would be many until the cancer cells were all killed but I just wondered if I was ever going to be okay again.

A few minutes later, they both walked out of the cabin, I was literally shivering out of fear, they both stood in front of me while Aria looked at me with a smile on her face.

"Are you ready Khushi?" She asked.

I looked at Shrey nervously, I don't know why I was just too scared today, I felt like I was going to start crying anytime soon.

"Hey, I'm right here with you." Shrey said as he grabbed my hand and pulled me closer to him, hugging me tight.

"Everything is going to be okay, you don't have to worry about anything at all, I am here and I am not going anywhere, you are going to be fine Khushi, trust me." He assured me.

I closed my eyes and I held on to him, trying to convince myself the same thing that it was all going to be okay.

I opened my eyes and the first thing I saw was Arnav standing in front of me, he had both his hands folded as he stared at me.

He took a few steps towards me as soon as our eyes met, he leaned closer to me and a smile curved up on his face.

"You don't have to worry about anything Khushi, I'm sure God took so much time to make you he wouldn't want you back so soon, you are the strong woman I know and I know you will fight this strongly, so instead of this tears, bring up confidence on your face and say out loudly that you will fight this." He smiled at me.

"I don't think I can do this." I said.

"You can, you have to, for me, because I love you so much I don't want to lose you." He placed his hand on my cheek lovingly, and maybe nothing else but this gave me the confidence, his love, him wanting me to be here for him.

"You can do this." Another voice interrupted, I broke the hug immediately and looked at Shrey, I looked around looking for Arnav but he was nowhere to be seen, maybe I was just imagining him.

I looked at Shrey sadly, I dint know why life had to be so terrible, why was I imagining Arnav right now when the person I needed the most was with me?

Why did I have to be stuck between wrong and right when all I should be doing at the moment was to fight this stupid cancer, why did I feel the need of having him here, right beside me?

"I am sorry Shrey." I looked at him sadly.

Honestly, right now I felt like the most terrible person, Shrey dint deserve this, he dint deserve his wife developing feelings for his own best friend.

I wanted to slap myself for even thinking about Arnav, hadn't we both made the decision? We were going to stay as far away as we could from each other so I had to stop thinking about him or hoping that he was going to come here and be with me.

Shrey was the one supposed to be with me right now and he was, and that had to be enough for me!

"Why are you saying sorry Khushi?" Shrey asked.

"For acting like a baby." I giggled trying to cheer him up.

"It's okay, I understand what you must be going through but just don't forget I am here with you, I always will be." He smiled.

"I know." I smiled back at him.