Only You

Cash P.O.V

I wake up in a hotel room with two naked girls next to me, I'm naked too. Fuck! I cheated on Riley. Again. Jesus Christ why do I do this?
The girls are asleep so I quickly toss my clothes from the other night in and walk out their room. I catch a glimpse of myself in the elevator and I look like shit. Hickeys on my neck, hungover as fuck. Jesus what did I do?
I get to the floor me and Riley's room is. I feel nauseas walking to the room. One look from her and I know it's gonna end. Do I even dare go in? I stand at the door contemplating if I should go in or not. Fuck it.

I open the door and tip toe in. No one. I tip toe to the bedroom. There she is. Sleeping so peacefully and silent. She has no clue of the man I am. What I did. How I feel. I'm finally famous and I can already feel it changing me. I look away from her body and quickly grab my bag and go to the bathroom. I immediately hop in the shower to wash off the memories and girls from last night. I feel so disgusting with myself. I take her concealer and hide the hickeys which thank god weren't too hard to hide. I toss my clothes on and hear the door creak open. A doey eyed, bed headed Riley standing in the door frame. I feel tears sting my eyes but I hold em back. How the fuck can I cheat on her? She's the love of my life. She just looks down speechless, she knows exactly what I did. I go to reach out for but she pushes my arm away. She looks at me with a blank expression that kills me inside.

"Riley.." is all I can say
She just walks away closing the door behind her. I stand there and look at my reflection
"Who the fuck do you think you are!?" my subconscious screams at me. I punch the mirror and it cracks. I huff and pull it together. Looking at myself again hating who I see.
"You're an asshole" my subconscious screams louder at me. I look away from the mirror.
I man up and open the door to Riley packing her bags, tears streaming down her face. No.
No! baby don't go.. I wanna scream but I feel like my lips are sewn shut and my feet glued to the floor. So I just watch her fall apart and pack her things. This is a scene I hate & I wish I could rewind and fix it. But I can't. I'm a coward. She pushes past me and heads to the door to leave. Still I stand there frozen!

I hear the front door open and this is when I move. I have never ran so fast ever. I slip between her and the door blocking her way. Slamming the door shut.
"You are not leaving me" I yell
"You left me.." she yells between sobs
"It was a mistake!" I yell back
"You're a cheater Cash! A cheater! Fuck you!" She pushes me away from her. Now what I do next destroys me. I push her back and pin her against the wall. The look in her eyes is full of Fear and heartbreak.
"Don't leave me. Please don't leave me. Riley I need you.. I fucking love you! Please don't go" I feel my eyes tear up. She looks away still crying
"How many times... How many times are you going to do this?" she looks up at me
"Riley I don't know! I just..." I stop and hold my tears back. I hate myself.
"Exactly" she sniffles back hers and gets out my grasps. The sound of the door slamming echos the room. She's gone. My babygirl is gone.
I yell and feel tears drop down my face. I wipe them away and get a text from Slim.

Slim: We gotta rehearse. Final show in NYC is tonight.

Fuck I don't wanna do this shit. I take a deep breath and pull myself together. I know for a fact ima be all pissy today. This is Riley's last night here too. I hope she doesn't go back to Cleveland and stays just this last night.
I put my shoes on and leave the hotel. I make a stop at a coffee house and get a cold brew and then head to the studio. The entire time walking in people say Hi to me and push past every single on of them saying fuck off or nothing at all. I reach my recording booth and slam the door behind me. Slim jumps up and sees me. He scans me and shakes his head.
I hear the beats play and I start spitting bars getting into my music. At least in my music I can explain how I feel. After what feels like hours in the booth I finally come out.

"So.... you good?" Slim asks me
"Do I fucking look good?" I snap
"Man what's your problem?" he snaps back
"The fuck is yours bro?" I raise my voice and Slim jumps up and eyes me
"If I was you I'd sit the fuck down bro" he yells
Rook barges in and looks at me.
"Y'all good" he yells standing between us breaking it up.
"Fine" I huff
"He's trippin" Slims sits back down.
"What happened?" Rook asks
I sit down and run my fingers in my hair
"I cheated." I blurt out
they both look at me and go silent. Yep that's exactly the reaction I was expecting too.
"And she left" I say covering my face
"So you guys broke up?" Slim asks
"Nah dude I don't know! She walked out the hotel room with her shit and left! I tried to stop her but I couldn't" I say frustrated
"Cash" Slim shakes his head disappointed
"I can try talking to her" Rook offers
"Can you?" I ask feeling too damn vulnerable
"I can try" he nods. I nod at him and look away
"Man good luck. You have fucked up so much with her.. do you really think she's gonna listen?" Slim speaks
"I don't know" I bite my lip
"Chill. I'll see what I can do" Rook reassures me. He gives me some kind of hope.
"Like now then" I snap and he flinches.
He storms off and I put my head in my hands and groan loudly.