"Is it a video?"
DATE : 02 : 08 : 19
I just want to cry. I want to flood tears from my eyes. I want to die. I'm actually sad this time, hurt and no one hurt me. I'm tearing up writing this, i don't do this. This is not me. I do not know who I am. I can't say it is because of something I watched because that would be melodramatic, but i don't think you realize how much of what i watched meant something to me. I watched CALL ME BY YOUR NAME. I remember reading the book and just staring at the cover because it made me feel so nice. It made me feel represented, and now that I've watched the movie it's different. I feel so sad because it represents me. La La Land didn't make me feel this way. It's not going away, i can't stop thinking about it. I know why it makes me sad because everything in that movie is what i want for myself and everything a queer person asks for we want complete acceptance and tender love with someone who loves you for who you are in it i saw myself i was elio but i wasnt that movie showed me everything that i wished for and then it ended oliver left but the love was still there and elio was so moved by just the call and the scene with the tears and the fireplace moved me the most because thats how i feel i don;t have someone to share a feeling feel nor can i have someone to share something with so im just staring in the the flame wishing longing for love that i cant have but i want it for myself and long for it. no movie has portrayed a kind of love that i want for myself than this this movie was not defined because it was a gay love story it was defined because it was love
