The Royal Series | H.S [Instagram]

[152] Wakey Wakey

[ Real Life ]

—

11 days passed.
11 days of going to the hospital back and forth. You'd be lying if you said you completely bonded with Iris, but you were getting there.

Guilt had eaten you up but was pushed down a little with every therapy session.

Harry knew you still weren't comfortable enough. You weren't as good as new and he found himself wondering if you were ever going to go back to how you were before the incident.
The kids missed you. For being only two and 7 months, they were smart. They knew something wasn't fine.
They knew it when you didn't smile as big, you didn't kiss them goodnight, only hugged them. You were quiet.

And maybe that's why your fridge had more colourful scribbles on paper on it, each one a gift from the twins. Evangeline had picked a bouquet of flowers with Harry, kissing you sloppily on the cheek as she struggled to hold it up before putting it on your lap.

"Flowers for Mummy." She had said.

Tommy played with your hair. Everyday.
It was how you and Harry made him sleep and boy did he love it when you played with his hair.
He saw his Daddy doing it too so it had to be something right.

Iris had been improving, finally moving out of the NICU and the news made you fidgety.
Harry was ecstatic; eyes glimmering with happiness and relief and dimples poking out and on display.

One final thing had to be tried and if it worked, you were going to go home with your baby — you were going to breastfeed her.

You gripped Harry's hand, feeling sorry for him because you probably cut off his blood circulation but he didn't seem to mind.

You saw the nurse approaching you, Iris in her arms in her yellow onesie as you sat on the hospital bed.
You gulped, feeling Harry squeeze your hand supportively.

"There we go, Mummy." The nurse beamed, handing Iris to you gently, letting you cradle her in your arms. "You can ring us if you need anything." With that being said, she was then out of the room.

"Want me to leave?" Harry asked softly, running his knuckles so gently on your baby's cheek, looking at you.

You paused for a moment, and Harry almost got ready to leave. "No." It was soft and genuine.

His heart fluttered, looking at you as you looked down on the squirming baby who wanted to her food. He smiled, reaching to put his hand on your neck, his thumb grazing your bottom lip, making you look at him. "You can do it."

You stared at him for a few seconds, letting his words sink in. You exhaled, nodding slowly. You unbuttoned your shirt, brought your hair to the other side with a huff as it kept falling on your face. Harry stood, bringing it back before tying it with the hair tie he stole from you a year ago and always wore it around his wrist, going for a loose low bun.
"Thank you." You smiled, taking off your bra and putting it beside you.

You placed Iris correctly, guiding her towards your nipple. You didn't know what you were expecting. Of course she wouldn't latch right away.

"Come on, hungry bird." You whispered, propping her up.

You tried again, and again, and again.

Harry bit his lip nervously, getting jittery as he eyed you cautiously.

"She doesn't want to lat-" You almost cried, your emotional state getting the best of you, when she wrapped her mouth around you, beginning to slowly get the hang of it, "There you go, petal. There you go."