How It All Started

Chapter 34- The Final Goodbye

Chapter 34

I've been here for two days now, every day during all the time I could get during visiting hours, was with my mom. I had to cherish these moments, I knew that, no matter what happened in the past, I need to remember my mother in a good way. I would like to say that she looks to be getting better, but I can't lie to myself like that. We all know she is going to die very soon, even she knows it. Personally, I would not like to know when I'm going to pass, it would freak me out, but mom she doesn't seem to care. It's almost like she saw it coming.

Spending this much time away from Shane has made me realize how much we've been together lately. We're always together, and in complete honesty, I don't want it any other way. Right now it's ten in the morning and I'm just waiting for dad to finish getting ready before we go to the hospital. Yesterday moms blood pressure dropped lower than it already was, making everyone that much more on edge. I met a couple of her friends, they are so Italian but they all speak very good English. They kept on telling me how much my mother told them about me. Making me feel even worse about not coming here before now.

Once dad finishes getting ready we get in the car and he drives to the hospital where my mother is located. Getting inside the plain white building, we get in the elevator just like every other time I've been here and go to the floor she's on. Though we got here a little bit early, they let us in because they finished helping her. Dad finally told me that they stopped the treatments that were keeping her actually alive.

"Hey darling," my mom whispers as I hug her, just like I did every other day.

"Hey mom, how are you feeling today?"

"Feeling alright," she smiles small before looking up at dad who is behind me, smiling down at us.

"Hey honey," dad takes a seat next to her in one of the two chairs provided. Sitting down to the one next to him, I sigh sitting back.

"Hi Johnny," I always found it weird how my mom called dad by anything different than his real name or dad. Making conversation with them, I excuse myself for a moment to give them some time alone. My father claims that it's better when I'm there but I really want them to have some of their last moments. Walking around I finally find a vending machine, sliding in the number of euros it asked for, my bag of chips fall to the bottom where I retrieve them. After walking around for about ten minutes and I've finished my bag of chips, I go back into the room.

Once I sit back down in my spot, dad tells us that he has to go make a couple of calls and that he'll be back soon. Accepting it, we both nod. After a couple seconds of silence I break it, "hey I forgot to tell you, Shanelle is pregnant!" I smile widely. Her eyes open wide and a large smile makes its way on to her lips.

"No way! With that Blake boy right?" Nodding she smiles widely. "Tell her I said congratulations,"

"I will for sure," the room falls silent, the only noise is coming from in the hall.

"I wish that I could have met my grandchildren," her voice is quiet and sad. "Everyone knows that you and Shane would make some adorable babies," my cheeks flush at her comment, while my heart still seems to be in pain from her first statement. "Oh honey you and Shane are perfect for each other, and there is no hiding it,"

Her bluntness all of a sudden in catching me off guard. "Mom-" I was cut off by her once again.

"No I need you to listen, you love Shane with all your heart, right?" I nod without hesitation. "You can almost feel it, how when miss him it seems worse than anything else, when you're with him it's almost all you think about," nodding along with her statements she stops for a second. "Don't waste your chance with him," I stop all my movements at this point. She's right, why waste it.