Lavender Monarch has Exactly Thirteen Fears

12. tsunami

Before I know it, I'm waiting side-stage about to go on. My stomach is in knots and I'm terrified. I see Patty walk up beside me.

"You're gonna do great Lavender," he whispers.

"I sure hope so," I say and hold my hands out for a hug. He wraps me up in his arms and I already feel a lot better. I bury my head into his shoulder and let myself forget about my nervousness for a second. He chuckles under his breath and pushes me away.

"Go! It's about to start," he says laughing. I take a deep breath. Here goes nothing.

I hear my cue and I step out onto the stage, almost wincing from the brightness. I turn to face the audience. A sea of people stare out at me and my heart is thumping. I fix my eyes on the back wall, trying to pretend they aren't there. It doesn't work.

"I.." my voice comes out in a hoarse whisper. The silence drags out and I'm just waiting for the sniggers to start. Line. What's my line? I feel my head pounding. I glance rapidly to the front of the stage. It's written there in bold writing. 'My husband, so treacherous. Oh, woe to my heart! He shall be stoned for this abandonment!' I open my mouth and close it again. Shit. I can't do this. I bet everyone is laughing at me. They'll probably start chucking things at me like hecklers used to do in the past. 

Ishouldneverhavedonethis. Ishouldneverhavecomehere. My mind turns to a jumbled mess. 

My train of thought slides off the rails. The train driver turns into a giraffe with purple spots and all the carts are varying shades of lime green. In one of the carriages, is a bunch of apples with holes down the middle of them and in another are rainbow lollipops.

I can't grab onto any singular thought, they all just rush part me and the train goes sailing right off a cliff into an ocean of spiders. I blink and snap my eyes forward. I'm still on stage, who knows how long I've been standing here looking into space like an idiot? I glance to my right and I see Patty walk on the stage in his costume. 

He's not in this scene. What is he doing? He walks over beside me and grabs my hand, holding it up in the air. 

"This fair lady has been struck unable to speak because of her husband's treachery! The poor woman, shall he be stoned?" I suddenly realise what he's doing and I silently thank him. He leans down to whisper in my ear, "c' mon you can do this. Just read the line. I believe in you." He drags his hand across my throat. "Or shall this woman be blamed?" he cries and pushes me away dramatically. "I do not know, but perhaps she does?" He winks at me before turning away and striding off the stage. I take a deep breath. 

"No, it is not I who has commited this crime, 'tis my husband. He shall be stoned!" I glance side stage and see Patty beaming, he raises his hands up in a thumbs up and I feel a surge of confidence. I can do this. 

And I do. The more I get into it, the more I relax and soon it is not even me on the stage but instead, the Queen of Tinumau who's husband has betrayed her. It's like the crowd isn't even there. 

The play ends and we walk onto the stage holding hands to take our final bow. Amelia is on my left side and I grin at her. As we bow, they turn the house lights on and I can see my whole family in the crowd clapping and waving at me. I know we're not supposed to, but I can't help but wave back. I even see that June's mum has come to watch and she gives me a thumbs up. I spot June next to her too and he has the most ridiculous grin on his face. 

After I've packed up my stuff I wander down to my family and they all start clapping when I come over. I smile at them. I can't even hide how proud I am of myself. 

"Be quiet! Your embarrassing me," I say. My sister just wraps me up in a hug.

"You were amazing!"