'Loving you instead' Part Four

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Joey Tribbiani & Chandler Bing & Y/N

Collaboration with KatetheKat8

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The events of that evening kept you awake all night. You couldn't prevent yourself from tossing and turning as the moment you kissed your boyfriend best friend replayed continuously through your mind. By the time your alarm went off, you hadn't slept a wink. You hoped that work would distract you from the situation that was consuming your every thought but no such luck. You struggled to focus of anything at work because you couldn't figure out what to do. You continuously tried to convince yourself that you love Joey but Chandler's face appeared in your mind every time you tried. Being in a position where you having to decide between two important people in your life was really affecting you because you knew that someone was going to get hurt. When it was time for you to leave work, it suddenly hit you that you were meant to meet the group at central perk. You didn't know if you were ready to face Chandler just yet so you contemplated not turning up. At the same time, you needed to prove to yourself that what happened was just a mistake and that you were meant to be with Joey and to do that, you had to act like nothing ever happened with Chandler. You made the decision to go to the coffee house and you walked inside with confidence so that Chandler couldn't see the effect he had had on you. However, that confidence simmered down slightly when you saw that the only available seat was between Chandler and Joey. "Typical," you muttered.
You plastered a smile on your face and made your way over to the group. "Hey guys," you grinned, dropping down into the seat, pecking Joey on the cheek.
"Hey Y/N, how was work?" Monica asked.
"Same old, same old, nothing exciting," you responded.
Joey wrapped an arm around your shoulders and pulled you closer to him. "I missed you today," he mumbled, as he pressed a few gentle kisses to your neck.
"I missed you too," you replied, running your hand up and down his thigh softly.
Out of the corner of your eye, you saw Chandler staring at the two of you, an unreadable expression spread across his face. "Oi! Enough of the PDA," Ross chuckled.
Joey placed a kiss on your temple before turning to engage in conversation with Ross. These moments used to be your favourite thing after a hard days work but with Chandler sat beside you, and the temptation to jump into his arms and kiss him looming, these moments felt wrong. "I'm going to go grab some coffee, anyone want anything?" You asked as you stood up.
Everyone shook their head, but as you moved to go buy Chandler he piped up and said," I think I need a refill, I'll come with you."
No one noticed the panicked expression that appeared on your face at the thought of being alone with Chandler. You didn't answer him as you made your way to the counter. Before you could even order, Chandler came behind you and did it for you. The two of your stood in silence momentarily, both of you seemingly trying to figure out what to say. "I think we need to talk about what happened last night," Chandler said, quiet enough that people around you wouldn't hear.
"I don't know if it's a good idea," you responded.
Chandler slipped his hand on top of yours which was resting on the counter, and intertwined you fingers. Thankfully your bodies blocked his action so no one noticed that the two of you were holding hands. "How about I come by later, we can talk properly then," Chandler suggested.
You nodded and slipped your hand away from Chandler's as the server approached the two of you. You took your drink and walked away without saying anything more to Chandler. Immediately as you sat down, Joey put his arm back around you whilst he was still talking to Ross as if it was something natural to him. "Since I forgot about last night, how about me and you have a night together tonight, just me and you," Joey said to you as he turned his attention away from Ross.
"I'm sorry babe but I made plans with the girls from work tonight, maybe tomorrow," you lied.
You couldn't believe how effortlessly you had lied to Joey but you knew that this talk with Chandler was far too important to postpone.

••••••••••••••••••••••

Later that evening, at around 8pm, three knocks echoed around your apartment. You knew it was Chandler before you even opened the door and this made your nerves hit you like a ton of bricks. You swung open the door to reveal Chandler stood there, hands in his pockets, a nervous expression evident on his face. "Hey, come in," you said, stepping aside to let him inside.
He settled down on your sofa and the two of you could feel the awkward tension that was between you both. You sat down on the sofa but at the other end. "I don't bite Y/N, you don't have to sit so far away," Chandler chuckled, patting the space next to him.
You scooted along the sofa so that you were nearer to Chandler, but not too close to him. "Look Y/N, I know that you're probably hoping that I came here to tell you we should forget about last night and move on from it but I can't say that. Last night meant something to me and I know it meant something to you too," Chandler said.
"Even if it did mean something to me, I'm with Joey, who is your best friend might I add," you responded.
"I can't help how I feel about you Y/N," Chandler mumbled.
You didn't know what to say. You knew that you had feelings for Chandler but you knew that you had feelings for Joey. You believed that you loved Joey, but maybe you were wrong. Maybe Chandler was the one that you were supposed to be with. "And how exactly do you feel about me?" You asked.
"When I used to see you and Joey together, being all cute and what not, I used to get jealous. I used to think that that was because I wanted a relationship but I now realise it was because I wanted to be in Joey's place. I wanted to be the one who got to kiss you, to hold you, to love you the way you should be loved," Chandler explained, whispering the last part.
You looked up at Chandler through your eyelashes, completely speechless. You didn't know how to respond to that. But what you did know was that you felt something for Chandler, something you didn't expect to feel. Since you were taking a while to respond, Chandler looked down at his lap, feeling embarrassed. You placed a finger under his chin and moved his face to look at yours before moving your hand to cup his face. "I don't know exactly how I feel Chandler, but I know that I feel something for you, something I shouldn't feel for my boyfriends best friend," you muttered.
You felt yourself leaning towards Chandler, and before you could even register what was happening, your lips were back on his again.

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