savior

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i had just finished getting my hair done and i felt
brand new. i went with twyla to the beach afterward. i posted a new picture on instagram and it instantly blew up.

7,749 likeswillowcelestee waiting for you by the oceanbillieeilish thas my babyfinneas :0twy

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7,749 likes
willowcelestee waiting for you by the ocean
billieeilish thas my baby
finneas :0
twy.fay my triplet right there
cc_summers ugly ass
maggiembaird miss you!

i smiled at all the comments from my family. i really only got so many likes and had so many followers was because of billie, really. i guess also because i was a model.

i missed them so much. i missed being so close to each person i loved so dearly. i decided i needed something to distract myself for the time being while the o'connell's were gone. i didn't have my doctors appointment anymore and the other two triplets had plans. i called up my friend, hanna. "hello?" she picked up the phone. "hey! it's willow." "oh my gosh, hi willow! how are you?" "i'm ok, you?" "just dandy." it was nice to hear a friendly voice. "what's up?" she asked in her bubbly tone. "i'm just... bored and i wanted to know if you wanted to hang?" "that sounds awesome! what time can i come over?" i tapped my fingers on the couch. she didn't know i moved. "that's funny- i actually moved out and have a place of my own." hanna was two years older than me, so she understood a little bit more than most. "oh. that's cool! where you at?" i gave her my new address and told her dinner worked perfectly.

at 7:00 i heard the doorbell ring. i had dressed in something a little fancy, a flowy skirt and a tight tank. hanna was wearing a cute polka dot romper. i met hanna through my old dance classes that i only lasted a few weeks in. i'm very uncoordinated. "hi!" i wrapped my arms around her. she smelled like fresh laundry. "heyyyy! oooh, something smells good." i had been making a pizza i bought from the store. "i just took the pizza out of the oven." we sat down on the couch, each with a plate stacked full of slices of pizza. "so... why are you living alone? you're so young. i don't get it," hanna munched on a piece of pepperoni.

"i'm pregnant. that's why." i was getting numb to saying it. that i'm carrying a baby, it wasn't a shocker anymore. hanna choked on a piece of pizza. "you're what?" "ya.." "congrats, i mean, that's awesome, but... is that what you want?" "no- yes! i don't know... it's too late now," i rubbed my face in a circular motion. "sheesh. that's a bummer. i wish i knew sooner. so, who's the dad? did someone do something to you?" i shook my head anxiously. "no, no. i let it happen. i shouldn't have. it was such a mistake. and it's... finneas." her jaw dropped. hanna cupped her mouth, "what? finneas? the finneas? musical legend finneas?" i smiled a little bit. that was the father of my baby. "yes! him!"

hanna winked at me. "be glad that's the dad, hon. you could have a dead beat man who makes no money and weighs over 300 pounds. instead you got a hot ginger who sings, makes money, actually cares, and is related to billie eilish." i nodded. she was right. but i was still having his baby at 17. "it's not that simple. i cheated on someone with him." "who?" "billie eilish." "you cheated on billie eilish?" "yup." "fuck dude." "yup. fuck." hanna frowned. "does she know?" "hell no! what am i going to do?" "i can help you hide the baby bump for a few months. come
to cycling with me! you'll stay in shape so well that you will hardly look like a mama. and you can model more and keep it from billie a little while longer."

it sounded amazing, but i wasn't sure about the idea of hiding it from billie. "ok, just a few weeks. i'll tell her when i go to her concert." hanna grinned, "perfect. i gotta run, the dog is hungry!" we said our goodbyes and planned to meet on monday at the cycling place she went to. this would be good for me.

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