Part 13

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Repentance is a process and not something that happens at one particular moment. It requires consistency.

Arnav came straight to Laxminagar from his office. He had delegated most of his work to Aman and Akash (who had been cold to him since yesterday). He wanted to focus completely on Khushi. From whatever had happened till date, he knew it was an uphill task, infact an impossible task but he needed her forgiveness. He realized the necessity of repentance and how direly he needed to redeem him behavior. Yesterday, Khushi had shown him the harsh reality between them. His insensitivity while dealing with her. Till now he had always done what he wanted, never asking her about her wishes. He had always assumed  and made decisions on both their behalf, always dominating her. His one-upmanship has caused as much damage as his wretched deeds have and now he understood how utterly wrong it was. The reins of their relationship were no longer in his hands and it was rightly so. He has to repent his sins and at the same time create a balance in their relationship. What she wants is of utmost importance. It would be callous of him to assume that she would forgive and forget like previous times. He had in a sense mocked her pain yesterday by asking her to marry him. His limit to make mistakes has been crossed. Anjali was right. Khushi has reached her threshold. 

Well you only need the light when it's burning low
Only miss the sun when it starts to snow
Only know you love her when you let her go
Only know you've been high when you're feeling low
Only hate the road when you're missing home
Only know you love her when you let her go
And you let her go

He rang the bell of Gupta House. Garima opened the door and told him in clear words that he was not welcome there anymore. He pleaded and requested for a chance to change himself but it was futile. Buaji came and closed the gate on his face. Garima reminded him of Shashi's health when his and Buaji's confrontation of 'his knocking the door and her shutting the door on his face with different warnings' happened for the fifth time. Arnav then stood outside the door. Garima came out after about 3 hours to pick the dried spices and found him still standing there. She sighed. What was he doing? She informed Buaji who said let him do whatever he wanted but she wont open the door and she really didnt open the door.



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Khushi had a free period and was sitting idly in staff room, confused what to next. She had already done all her pending works as she had free time at home because her coaching hours were free. She was used to do some or other thing round the clock and this relaxation that she had enjoyed for some days felt so boring now. She was about 3 months now, everything was going well, other than nausea, upset stomach and her taste buds getting weird she and baby was doing fine and next checkup was about a month away. Even her stomach has not gown big, she touched her baby. She wasn't allowed physical work and this free time now felt all dull and monotonous. Also her thoughts have again started to shift to Arnav which she didnt want at any cost.

She got up from her seat and sat next to a fellow teacher who seemed to be studying something deeply. She was Shalini, not very friendly but so so kind of person. She taught Maths in class 12th. Khushi disturbed her and enquired about what looked like some aptitude question paper that she was going through. Questions were similar to those she taught in coaching so Khushi being Khushi wanted to help her. She must be preparing for some exam, Khushi thought. Shalini politely refused help and told her about her NET JRF exam in coming months. It was sort of a dismissal but Khushi wasn't discouraged. She kept talking. Shalini gave short replies to Khushi's questions which forced Khushi to finally move away and surf about this exam using school desktop. She had heard about it once or twice in her college but the looks Shalini gave her when she asked what is was, were as if she had been living under rock entire life. Like she didnt know the Sun rose from the East. 

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