Thief. {Eustass Kid x Reader}

Of Mice and Men.

Finally, we're here!

3 hours of riding shotgun and 4 cups of coffee has gotten you to this moment; the van pulling up in an alleyway beside the restaurant, you can already spot Crocodile waiting patiently for you.

He's a fancy and handsome man with dark slicked back hair and a gold plated hook for a hand; Kid had told you on the way over here that they call the owner of this establishment 'Crocodile' because he actually lost his left hand to one as a child.

Nobody knows what his real name is, but that's the least of your concerns right now.

You don't miss how the man also has a large scar across his face either.

"The exterminators." He calmly greets you both, placing a large cigar in between his lips before reaching out his right hand for Kid to shake but the redhead simply ignores it, causing you to step in and greet the gentleman instead.

Damn it, Kid! Why must you be so rude?!

"Sir Crocodile, yes?" You chime with a forced friendly tone as you take a firm grasp around his palm before politely shaking his hand on Kid's behalf, the man only nodding his head in confirmation while returning the gesture. "Good afternoon, may I ask; how long have the rodents been a problem for you? We'll need to know exactly how many we might be dealing with." 

You're not one to brag or anything but you must admit, you're good at lying.

Oh, who am I kidding? Of course I'm going to brag. 

Especially to Kid, all the way back to the sanctuary.

Speaking of Kid, you can practically feel his stare lingering on you, the redhead grumbling something incoherent in the background as Crocodile smirks down at your small frame.

"It was only recently bought to my attention, my employee found droppings in one of our storage cupboards and that simply cannot be ignored."

"I see. Well, no problem, we'll eradicate the pests for you in no time!"

Your reassurance brings a somewhat genuine smile to the raven's lips as he hums a low "I believe it." under his breath, holding your hand in place for a moment before he finally releases it, reaching up to take his cigar from his lips.

"C'mon, woman." Kid's gruff voice finally reaching your ears as he nudges you upon passing, holding a big white box in his hands as he makes his way inside, being sure to insult you every step of the way. "You're here to work, not flirt! What do you think this is, a brothel?"

Excuse me?!

"I'll leave you both to it then." Sir Crocodile mutters nonchalantly whilst you send Kid a deadly glare before he makes his way inside the restaurant, luckily the owner didn't hear the subtle squeaks coming from inside the box that Kid is holding.

"Flirting?! Really, Eus--"

"Don't say my name!"

"Don't accuse me of flirting when I'm just keeping up appearances!" You whipser-yell at the redhead as you both enter the kitchen, Crocodile had seemingly decided to head straight for the main dining area of the building, likely to prepare for the lunchtime run. "You could've at least shook the man's hand!"

"Maybe I didn't want him to hear the--!"

"Will you two be quiet?" A new voice emerges, silencing you both at the same time and drawing your gazes toward an...odd looking man; he has brown hair shaved into an odd shape, it almost resembles a scorpion, the length is pulled into a braid-like thing and he has a wide mouth with both black and white teeth, abnormally long arms and narrow eyes. "You'll give yourselves away."

Well, he's--!

"You're ugly." Kid bluntly mumbles, causing the stranger to scoff.

"No, my name is Scratchmen Apoo, not 'ugly' but interesting guess." It doesn't ring a bell for you, your brows knitting together as you hum curiously to yourself but Kid seems to notice who he is, though that doesn't stop the redhead's bad manners.

"Apoo, huh? You are one creepy-looking bastard, you know that?"

"That makes two of us."

Lovely, now that we're all kindred spirits, can we perhaps get on with the fucking job?

"What do you gain from screwing over your boss? I assume you're the employee who said you found shit, right?" Kid questions as he opens up the box, hesitating to do much else with it however as his eyes rest on the piano-teethed male.

"Doflamingo said he'll give me a job at his restaurant if I help run Crocodile out of business, I'll be getting paid a lot more working for him than I do here so of course, I'm gonna take the opportunity!"

Wow, what a snake...and that's coming from a thief.

"Ha, good choice!" The redhead responds with a devilish grin as he tips the box onto it's side, allowing the many mice to escape within the kitchen. "Then you might be able to afford plastic surgery!"

Ouch.

"Kid..." You lightly scold, giving the beastly male a somewhat disapproving look.

"Alright, Eustass! I get the point!" Apoo practically barks before moving aside and opening the doors into the main dining area, the mice all retreating into the room and causing screams to erupt as well as the scraping of chairs.

Judging by all the screams and shouts, you'd be safe to assume that there was a lot of customers visiting this place, Kid taking a rough grip around your wrist before hastily dragging you toward the backdoor of the building that leads back into the alleyway.

"C'mon! Time to go!"

Once you're pulled outside, you briskly make your way around to the passenger side of the van whilst Kid climbs into the driver's seat. The very second you shut the car door, the redhead reverses out of the narrow lane and straight onto the main road without even looking to make sure it's safe.

Luckily for you both, there were no cars in the way, just the pedestrians piling out of Crocodile's restaurant but by some miracle, Kid manage to avoid mowing them down also.

"I haven't got my seatbelt on, you stupid man!"

"Then hurry up and do it, stupid woman!"

What a fun ride back this is going to be...

At least the job went quite smoothly compared to the others.

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