Life of a teenage creep

So, it turns out I might be gay. .__________.

Son of a bitch. So, Sorella and I LOVE taking online quizzes, right? Well, I took an 'are you gay, straight of bi' quiz, and it turns out I'm bi, leaning towards straight, BY THAT QUIZ'S STANDARDS.

I do not think I am gay.

I do not think I am bi.

Sadly, my head is all fucked up from previous experience, so.... no fucking idea what's going on in my head. So, I take one test first, then I take a few more, right?

Then I got sidetracked with weird-ass quizzes and shit,which you do definatly NOT need to hear the results of (I'm a parrot on the inside, and I'm apperantly between the ages of 25 and 30, no wonder I feel so damn old, and I'm a red head on the inside who all the boyyz luv, according to these werird-ass quizzes. xD).

So, yeah, I took some quizzes and tests and shit.

I am going to post some screencaps of the results. Fuck me, I'm scared. XD I mean, half of them made sense, logially, but the others? Bat-shit crazy, man. Two out of three logical answers say I'm bi.

Where the fuck is this coming from, though?! I mean, I've always thought myself to be perfectly straight. I mean, guys turn me on, that means I'm straight, rigght?! WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON RIGHT NOW FUCK IT ALL

Now for Steak Fries' corner! (still looking for an official name. Leave ideas in the comments!) So, anyway, me and two siblings had the house all to ourselves!

No, we didn't party.

We have no lives.

So we just fucked around on our various forms of internet.

And I watched some X-Men, but that's a story for another time! XD

Anyway, we had Steak Fries out of the cage today, and I was sitting with him/her/it on my lap upstairs, right?

Wrong. Steak Fries was wandering around on the ground, eating whatever he could fit in his beak. It was interesting to watch. I once watched a duck fit an entire chicken leg bone down his throat, though. Scared me half to death. I loved that duck. *now has to make special chapter about my duck*

So, moving on, there was another thing I did, I think.... ummm.... Nope. Nothing. BUT I COULD DO THE WHOLE THING ABOUT SHIT I DO WITH OUR PETS OH HELLZ YEAH

Ok, so, a day or so ago, we took Doofy and White kitty and Steak Fries to the parjk across the street!

It's an old people park, not a toys park, though. XD

So, we get there and Steak Fries delves into the jungle that is the bushes, and White Kitty immediatly starts trying to fuck around with Doofy.

Now, Doofy is very lazty sometimes. Ok, if she's running off, she's like a wolf in the trees, but she can also be a sloth in the trees if you get her at the right time. So, White Kitty is literally throwing himself at my puppeh's feet while Steak Fries is goofing around in the flowers, and I lose track of them, right? So, I scream art Sorella 'Get that chick where you can see him, dammit' and go to find Doofy.

I go over around the oocrner and find White Kitteh, just sitting there like he owened the place, so I'm all 'yo, wassup, kitteh, seen Doofy?' He actually walked with me and showed me where she was, a block away.

She's like an escape cheeta sometimes.

So, I herd her back and find White Kitty ready to pounce on Steak Fries, even though there's a shit-load of game around here and we're constantly finding dead stuff around our house (I swear it's not me, really!).

So, I pint this out and my dog, the PeaceMaker, goes and pounces White Kitty.

She's boss. She runs off pitbulls and shit, silent and deadly, bros.

Anyway, Doofus pounces the cat, and he's al 'WHAT THE FUCK KITTEH EATIN BEOTCH' and skittered off.

Oh yes, my dog actually stepped on the chicken. She has this weird thing about stepping on stuff, and if there's a kitty, she steps on him. Just THWACK puts her paw o him. If there's a chicken, THWAK, paw'd. Another smaller dog? THWACK. Paw'd. So, after she stepped on the baby chicken, she decided she needed to run over the White Kitteh. Literally. He was walking along, minding his own busines, and then THWACK she ran over him, just like the fucking Running of the Bulls or something.

He was kinda happy, actually, since he was looking for her to play with him the whole time, all rolling around on his back and being cute and shit. I ended up rubbing his belly and he's sooo soft. x3

So, then he got the dog back. She was walking in a blind spot, and he threw himself in front of her and rolled and grabbed her back paw with all of his claws and teeth and shit. He's a fuckin' ninja, man.

Meanwhile, Sorella was daydreaming while the chicken disappeared from sight. This distressed me severely. I actually said at one point, 'Girl, you gotta watch the damn chikin, cuz we don't need none of this chick-losin' shit I keep seein' from y'all, and it's fuckin' with meh, man, and I do not appreciate this'. So, yeah, I had a bit of a moment there.

So, then we had to go home, since it was getting dark, right? :D Too bad, Doofy was a block down the street the other way. I ended up carrying the chick across the street while Sorella retrived the dog.

It was awesome.

Then, there's the time I toaster-popped a cat! I was sitting on my big sister's couch, right by the coffee table, and her huge fat white cat (not White Kitteh) was coming through, right?

Now, her couch and the coffee table are like this ~> | | right next to eachother, in a blind lalley, no escape.

So, I get a lot of comments about me having 'very muscular legs', right? Well, the cat went to step over my feet, and I just THWACK toaster-popped him three feet into the air.

However, when that same cat was still young and skinny, we had another adventure! He and I were hanging, he was called Twitchy (Because after living with Twist, he got this little twitch in his left eye that made him look crazy xD) or something then, cuz he was a fuicking spaz before he was neutered, and I was twitching the curtains for him to mess with, but rthen...

I decided to hold the bat-shit crazy cat. I picked him up, and immediatly he started clawing my forearm, since i had a short-sleeve on.

By the end of the encounter, my arms was bright red and literally COVERED in scratches. I actually still have a scar down my arm from where my favorite dead kitty, Thomas the Sliver Tiger used it as a launch pad and took a big long line of flesh from my wrist.

R.I.P., Tom-Tom.

Moving onwards, we have... DUN DUN DUHHHHHhhHHhhHHhh~!!!!! the bit of the orange kitty.

When we started in this house, we got first one cat, Tommy-Tom-Thomas, then Cleo, the cute little kitten that just adored Tommy and cleaned his wounds whewn he came back from fighting and they'd cuddle together and shit. X3 But, at the same time, there was.... Emmy.

Emmy was this bright orange puffball that no one could housetrain. If you set out a litter box, she'd poopp right by the litter box. If you put her outside, she'd come inside to go potty.

Emmy ended up living with my older sister, where to this day he remains an outside cat who once in a while comes inside. Also, Emmy turned out to be an Elmer. XD

So, after we got rid of Emmy and Cleo disappeared, we looked for new kittehs. We got a pair of brothers, one a tabby who my mother insists is 'gray' but will always be Brown Kitty to me, and his brother, White kitty, who is very aggressive and sometimes an asshole and sometimes a total darling. He's crazy fun. Mister Friendly, or Kiwi Kitty, or Brown Kitty or Matthew Kiwi Friendly, as Fion says.(The Cat of Many Names) is a darling with everyone, though. He snuggles my neice and doesn't growl when she accidentially hurts him and he just loves to snuggle peoples. :3

so, anyway, for today's recap; I'm apperantly half-gay, my animals are messed up, and the chicken is swag and we have no lives. Wonderful.

That Bombastic Person that is Olivia, signing off.