Life of a teenage creep

Overanalysis, and the realization of mental issues!

Hi, my name is Olivia, and I'm a crazy person.

Lol, just kidding.

But, according to my newly fired therapist, I do hve some issues.

This is not big news, people. I literally have several bird's feet on my windowsill.

No, they aren't attached to birds anymore.

So, now you get the full deal on what went down on Friday, or as I like to call it...

*drumsroll* THE DAY THE GREAT OPPRESSION OF THE SHRINK BASTARD CABBAGE ENDED.

I like dramatic stuff. c:

Anyway, we'd visited him two or three times, and the guy should've known that we all, in my family of five, have severe PTSD.

He ignored this and tumbled through our triggers like a drunk deer in a Viet Cong war camp laced with tripwires.

I accidentially went piratey on his ass, though, and let loose my firey Scotch-Irish blood. I believe I said, exactly, "Speak your slanderous lies to my face, Cabbage!"

He didn't though. I can be very scary. ^ω^ Actually more on that in a second, though, because I do enjoy my witness intimidation/threats!

Anyway, this Cabbage guy had already made Sorella cry, because he mocked her adorable little thing where she can't say her 'R's right. This was something that our dad gave her shit about when he was being an ass.

Strike one, Cabbage.

Next, my youngest sister cried, because she absolutely hated the Cabbage man for making Fion so sad amd weepy.

Strike two, Cabbage.

Then, the asshole Cabbage decided to twist my sister's words(when I approached him about it head-on, he avoided and deflected. I know. Avoiding and deflecting and changing the subject is what my family is best at.) and assumed that I was molesting my baby sister.

No thank you, I prefer my mtes with stubble, not boobs.

He wouldn't tell me what he told my mother, which was that he would have me removed from the home if anything else came up.

I would have killed him. I got enough crazy from both sides of the family for that. The look onhis face, though, when I full-on rushed him, demanding answers.... beautiful. As someone who frequently intimidates people for kicks, that look on a full-grown man's face was like fucking christmas morning.

Now, he 'decided' that if we couldn't trust him, then it was useless going; we wouldn't get any more normal.

By the end of our appointments, not one person in my entire family trusted him.

Now, granted, I already have trust issues. I either get way too attached or simply hate the person for no reason.

And apperantly I have daddy issues. Something about 'Olivia ha a hard time dealing with te regection leftover from her father leaving, so she turns to the only male in her life, her brother, for approval. Her brother's totsl regection of her leaves her with a longing for any attention at all, even negative attention, which may be one cause of unrest in your home.'

Ok, those weren't his words, those are my own, because whenever I talk to anybody, I severely over-analyze stuff, even about myself.

I could totally be a shrink someday, but I hate listening to people complain and that's what a therapist does all day. I guess I should be a lawyer, since I'm great with loopholes.

One such scenario:

"Mom, you said not to open the chocolates until tomorrow. Two a.m. is tomorrow, it's after midnight." Yeah, we're like a nest of lawyers, evil included, at my place.

That's why we all adore debate, though we often end up brawling over whether or not we should just nuke the middle east, including all the human shields.

Most of us are heated patriots(my brothers areidiots, though)...

So, I've known I wasn't quite normal for a long time.

I watch documentaries for fun.

I consider sitting alone, reading three inch books whilst listening to classical music fun.

I say 'whilst'.

I make a lot of lists.

That and the fact that I have an undying urge to commit patricide lead me to the conclusion(along with several personal issues) that I have a self-diagnosis of...

A heaping dose of early trauma, seasoned with abandonment issues, trust issues, a slight dash of depression, a hint of unfounded resentment for the world, anti-social personality disorder, self-hate, and a touch of suicidal tendencies.

Aren't I a bucket of joy? If you look at the flip side, though, I have...

Unfounded optimism about the future, self-supplied false hope, this odd urge to stay alive long enough to see how my life plays out, undying love and devotion for my family, no mtter how much I seem to hate them(gotta keep up the emotionless hardass reputation), I'm a total softie for babies of most kinds, especially my niblings, I adore cooking and tend to obsessively make sure my sister eats enough(she's too skinny), I might end up getting sick from walking in the rain a lot, I like my sweets too much(I do believe All About That Bass might bemy theme song, that or the I Love to Eat song from Eureka's Castle- does anyone else knpw what that is?), a crazed love for old cartoons- I go bat-shit crazy for Elmo in Grouchland- and an aoration for new things.

I guess yo could say that everyone is normal, until you get to know them. Nobody's perfect.

Hang in there, bros, and look on the bright side! Keep those happy thoughts comin' or you'll fall outta the sky, you know? Look at the good things in life.

Your family hates you? Then why do they pay for your clothes, schooling, home, food, laundry bills and all tht crap?

You don't have a family? Ouch. Sorry, bro. Focus on making friends that you can trust, and build a new one.

I've walked through hell and came out the other side doing the cha-cha and blaring ACDC.

Look at the doughnut, not the hole, ok? Unless you've actually got doughnuts, and doughnut holes.

Then you eat both of them. There's always something good if you bother to look. You only have one hand? Check out how lucky you are to still have the other one!

Stay chill, bros, and don't let the darkness consume you.

-Olivia J. S. 14.12.14.

P.S., I've discovered I have this weird habit of spelling 'behavior' with a U(behaviour), like the European spelling. Make what you wish of that...