You're part of the Curtis family, the third child - two years older than Ponyboy. You all get along quite nicely, they've taught you everything you need to know. Expect love, of course they love you but you don't know anything about being romantic...
WARNING!! mention of suicide, if you are sensitive to this subject i advise you not to read this chapter.
you have been warned.
The gun shot, the fighting, the yelling, the crying, the sirens in the distant. I shaked violently in Dally's arms as he help me tightly to hide the fact that my brother is cold dead on the ground. The nerves make me throw up in my mouth, I truly had no tears left to cry. It hurt too much.
The blue and red lights from the cop car paint my vision, the colors blend in a grim manner. I turn to look on my left but I'm quick to turn back, on my left there is Blazes dead body. He had committed suicide once he triggered the first gunshot. There were only two shots this night.
I turn to my right, and once again I'm quick to turn back. On my right if Sodapop's body getting bagged, if only the gunshot had strike somewhere else it wouldn't of hit him dead in the chest. If only he didn't jump in front of us.
I think I'm gonna throw up again Dally rubs my back. I sob in his chest again, I hear him sigh sadly and his hand makes its way up to my head. He lift my head up so we can look at each other, I've never seen him look so disappointed in himself.
"I-im so sorry.." Our foreheads touch as a tear runs down his face, for once in his life he doesn't wipe it away in shame. Because there is nothing wrong with a man crying, it just shows how much they care. I don't say anything but kiss him weakly, we sit on the cold streets of Tulsa.
The flashbacks of when it'd be the whole gang walking on these streets not scared of anyone.
Now we walk in these streets, scared of our own reflections left in the puddles from rain. It rained consistently for three days after Sodapop's death, we think he was trying to tell us something.
Trying to tell us to grow up and continue living, to follow the dreams we always chased for.
My dream broke after that night, and I think that's when we all broke.
Darry walks up to me slowly, his eyes puffy and his arms shakey. "W-we uh gotta go to the hospital with them." I look up at him and nod my head, I feel bad for Darry because he can't let down his guard now. We're all counting on him, even after all this be still needs to be the big older brother even if he feels so small.
"O-oh.. okay let's go.." He helps me up weakly, chills run down my body once I'm all the way up. Darry pulls me close to his side, we walk in unision to the ambulance that holds Ponyboy. Ponyboy passed out from the sight of his older brother but also because of his wounds.
Dally watches me as I walk away from him, "I'll meet you there." I nod my head and continue inside the small car. "Is everyone coming?" Darry nods his head and puts his hand on Ponyboys. "Do.. Do you think he's with ma and dad?" Darry smiles lightly and nods his head, "Hell I know little buddy is hangin' with em." I frown and look at Ponyboys bruised face. I move his hair out of his face, a small groan comes out from his lips. His eyes open.
"(Y/n).. Darry.." Ponyboy looks around painfully, his eyes water. Most likely from pain, "Where's Soda?" His raspy voice asks Darry and I both hold his hand. "Do you remember everything?" Ponyboy stays quiet before letting the tears from his eyes fall, "Yeah.. I just wanted it to be a dream." Darry sniffles lightly, "Me too lil man.. me too." We all cry silently in the car.
.........
Every dream reminded me of him, and they were the same dreams over and over. Him dying repeatedly, but this time I had to watch. I couldn't turn myself, I would wake up almost every night crying and screaming. It sucked.
After two months the nightmares got worst, it happened every night and it was strange because when I tried to grab some one to hold no one was there... Sometimes I forgot Soda died, maybe it's because I had felt just as dead.
Sodapop was just like my twin, we were the closest in age. We did everything together, we talked the same, walked the same, laughed the same, even sometimes sleep the same. We were inseparable, but now it's just me and a pillow he slept with everynight. I still smell him, the warm vanilla scent but with a hint of metal and oil. I grab the pillow and turn around; staring at the opaque moon that shines in the distant.
I hold the pillow to my chest and cry silently.
I miss him.
.........
After six months we were told they had found a secret note left in one of Blazes jackets. It gave coordinates to where the true murderers were, a nurse and a psychotic ex. They were sentenced to jail because of murder and use of illegal drugs. I never felt more alive by those news in the past months.
I than graduated High School that same year, I walked with pride and confidence across the stage. Seeing the look on Dally's face as he watched me hold onto my diploma was the happiest I had seen him. He really was proud of me, later that night after the celebration he took me to his apartment he had just got and... I guess it goes from there.
Steve moved once he had enough money from the DX, he didn't leave a trace though; not even a single note. Just gone like that.. I'm guessing he couldn't handle the memories that flooded him from every place he went. He was a mess before he left, drank too much, didn't talk to anyone, just broken.
I can't blame him, everyone felt off...every party was awkward, but we still stayed together like a family no matter what, but we felt like this family could grow.
so dally and i started our own.
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