Exitium

🌹 n i n e t e e n

🌹 n i n e t e e n

♛

"I love you."

She repeated when he didn't respond. Was it too early to say that? Did he not love her? The thought made her eyes mist with tears and upon seeing that Aidoneus' eyes went from shocked to worried.

"Love." He called worriedly and wiped the single stray tear that fell. All the events from before came rushing back. Her killing someone and not feeling remorseful making her feel like she's some impenitent criminal, her seeing someone so grotesquely murdered that night without feeling disgusted and discouraged with Aidoneus or herself. Thinking of those made her cry. She was a very bad person. She could hear Aidoneus saying her name but she blocked him out, thinking about the things that should bother her but didn't bother her and that bothers the hell out of her. She did some very questionable and immoral things and she should be worried, she should be bothered, she should feel bad and she should be crying but she was not. The only thing that makes her want to cry is now. Aidoneus didn't acknowledge her feelings for him. Out of all the problems she should be crying about, her feelings for Aidoneus was the most worth crying for. Before she could stop herself she started sobbing and if she wasn't wallowing in her own tears right then she would've laughed from seeing the panicked look in Aidoneus' face. He was almost comical, he looked like he didn't know what to do. The poor Lord was clueless infront of his love. This was not Lord Nicolaou, this was her Aidoneus.

"Love look at me please." He gripped her chin and made her look at him. He wiped her tears away while kissing each cheek so tenderly. When he pulled back, she'd stopped crying and was looking at him, waiting for what he would say. His hand went to cup her cheek and the other went to her waist, bringing her closer to him as if the smallest gap between them hurts him. He stared right into her eyes and if sincerity had a voice it would be his as he spoke to her, "I couldn't even begin to describe how happy I am at this moment and every moment that I'm with you. But hearing you say that, finally hearing you say that, I-I--" he paused, closing his eyes and when he opened them it felt like someone new stared back at her. His eyes told her of a man who was once so powerful and proud, once so angry and hateful, once so vicious and evil and once so sad and lonely but as he looked at her his eyes told her of a different but somehow still similar man. A man whose dreams came true, whose prayers were answered, a man who looked like he knew love.

"Do you understand how happy I am after hearing you say that? I've dreamt of this in so many ways." He closed his eyes, his expression pained as if he was remembering a nightmare rather than a dream. He opened them to look at her with the same profound look he gave her that day they first met. "I would crawl through the bed and force myself to sleep just so I could dream of it again and when I can't I'd stare off into nothingness, feeling that void within my chest, feeling the pillows under me soaked with my despair because I know you won't ever say those words to someone like me. And now--Now you---" He faltered and Aiyana could see that he was trying to breathe properly. His confession only strengthened the beating inside her chest and it was only for the man who holds her as if she was his whole world. Tears escaped her eyes and eventhough her vision was blurry she could see that death's eyes had also begun to rain life. She reached out to touch his face and wiped his tears and she hoped she had wiped out the misery and sadness in his eyes too. Aidoneus truly believed he is not worthy of her, not deserving of her.

Another tear fell from his eyes and she wiped it before it landed on the floor. "Please tell me I'm not dreaming again love. Please." The desperation in his voice tugged painfully at her heart.