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SOMETIMES Raena assumed that sleep was only reserved for those pure of heart. She always found herself tossing and turning all night, haunted by memories of the past. By the time she woke up – that is, if she slept – her covers would be completely kicked off the bed, with her sheets spilling across the floor like running water.
She thought about the lives she ended, the faces of those now lost in an endless cycle of killing and more killing, only to end up reborn as a star in the gigantic galaxy they called home. You would think – after all these years, after all this numbness – that faces would just blur together. You would think all these people became nothing, but they didn't. No, Raena would be haunted by them for the rest of her life. They were a constant reminder that no matter how much she wanted to be good, she'd never be able to erase her past.
But tonight was different. Instead of repeating visions from the past, Raena couldn't stop her running mind from thinking of the future. I have to eliminate the last of the Jedi, Kylo had said. There wasn't much left. As far as she knew, Rey was the very last that the Jedi had, and without her, who knows what will happen. Kylo said that destroying her was the only way to win to war, but Raena begged to differ. Rey's death would only continue it.
She wondered how he would do it, if he got to her. Raena's dreams usually reminded her almost every night of when Kylo, too, thought destroying someone would give him the power he needed. She felt the searing pain of the crackling, red lightsaber tearing through her chest. The instant, blinding ache as the saber dug deeper and deeper inside her was a feeling she'd never forget. All her nerve endings being obliterated by the heat, before finally dissipating through her flesh and entire body.
This time, her dream warped the scene, and she saw Rey's face there instead of her own. She saw the pure shock covering her face, the immediate trauma as her wounds cauterized upon impact. Raena stood from the sidelines, watching, not being able to move. She tried running, but there was always an invisible wall in front of her. She smacked her hands against the unseen surface, and always ended up with nothing. Her screams couldn't be heard. Her actions were useless. All she could do was watch as Kylo ripped the lightsaber from Rey's chest, her eyes fluttering closed, before crumbling to the ground. Just like Raena had.
And then, there was the empress proposition. That goddamn empress proposition. She didn't give him an answer when he asked days ago, but it was only a matter of time before he brought it up again and her dreams certainly weren't helping her ignore it. They repeated the same imagery: Raena standing beside him as the galaxy fell to their feet before them. She was dressed in precious, ruby jewels and a red velvet gown, her hair done up in such an intricate way that it would make goddesses weep. She was Empress, and he was the Emperor. It was a future possibility that she couldn't ignore, but it was one that made her stomach churn.
