Nightmares -Saiouma/Oumasai-

-19-

Kokichi's POV

My hand was in Shuichi's as we walked to the dining hall. I had a big smile plastered on my face. I couldn't even suppress the overwhelming feeling of happiness Shuichi brings to me. I rocked our arms back and forth looking down at his beautiful hand adoringly.

"Kokichi, are you ready to do this?" He asked making me frown. I almost forgot that Kaito just made everyone know what was wrong with me. One of the things that are wrong with me anyway. I don't want them to look at Shuichi differently because of my mistake. Because I am a mistake...

"Not really..." I sighed stopping in my tracks trying to suppress the tears and the anxiety building up. I removed my hand from him to move my hands to my eyes. I pushed them against my eyes trying to stop everything from happening only to find it only made me more depressed.

"Hey, it's going to be ok. If you don't want to do this I can go grab us some food and bring it to my room. Or we could ask Kirumi..." He said taking my face in his hands kissing my cheeks to calm me down.

"Yeah... I don't want it to affect you... and I'm not sure I'm ready for them to all be staring at me like that..." I said under my breath afraid of how he would react if he heard. He only pulled me into his chest and rubbed my shoulders with one hand while his other one moved to pet my hair.

"It's ok if that's what you need right now Kokichi. If anything I'm not sure I want to confront them all either. I think you are so strong to be able to tell me this Kokichi." He said putting his face on my shoulder.

"I'm so proud of you Kokichi." He whispered into my ear making me blush.

"Well, I'm going to go to the room," I said abruptly leaving his arms and walking over to my room only to be stopped by Shuichi pulling me back into a hug from behind.

"I'm going to come with you, I'll call Kirumi to bring us some dinner ok?" He said while his grip loosened on my chest.

"Ok, thank you, Shuichi," I said feeling guilty again for being a burden on Shuichi.

"Of course anything for the person I love." He said in my ear making me blush again before grabbing his hand while I was still semi-flustered and pulled him into my room. He didn't say anything when we came into my room he just walked over to the phone and called Kirumi.

"Hey Kirumi, I was wondering if you could bring two meals to Kokichi's dorm room?" He asked before there was an of course on the other side of the line before he thanked her and hung up. He walked over to where I was laying down on my bed tears coming to my eyes. Why can't I just be brave enough to go to the dining hall? Why can't the Ultimate Supreme Leader confront his classmates? Why can't I just-

"It's ok," Shuichi said laying down in front of me and pulled me closer to him.

"Whatever you are telling yourself right now, know that I don't think that this is weak of you. You are so strong for making it this far and being able, to be honest with me to tell me what you need. I think you have made so much progress. I love you so much and I'm so glad I get to be with you Kokichi." He said into my ear while his hands were playing with my hair and slowly moving to caress my cheeks. I shivered at all the contact and smiled with a content sigh while I leaned into him more.

I didn't say anything but he seemed to be content with my silence and gave me a smile before planting a soft kiss on my forehead. I smiled to myself and nuzzled my face into the crook of his neck quickly mumbling an I love you into his neck.

Knock

Knock

"That must be Kirumi," Shuichi said before he slowly got up and made me groan from the loss of contact. He looked back at me and gave a small smile before he answered the door.

"Shuichi, here are the meals you requested." She said walking into the room making me nervously bury my head into the blankets on my bed making Shuichi laugh a little bit.

"Is Kokichi sick, if so I can-" She started before Shuichi cut her off.

"No, we just wanted to eat alone today. Thank you Kirumi." He said after she placed the meals on the desk before giving me a confused glance before silently leaving the room.

"Kokichi are you ok?" He asked walking over to me and rubbing my shoulder before I slowly sat up to look at him.

"Yeah, I'm fine..." I said quietly making him look at me concerned before he grabbed my hand and moved me over to my desk.

"Just eat as much as you can ok?" He said placing my food in front of me. I felt nervous looking down at the food almost afraid of knowing I have to eat it. I held my hands together to keep them from shaking and took a deep breath.

"Ok," I said before I slowly began to eat some of the meat and vegetables on the plate in front of me. Shuichi didn't look at me while I was eating which made me grateful because it makes me feel even more repulsive when people watch me eat. He finished and started cleaning up his spot while I stared down at the food on my plate. It was almost taunting me. I shivered and held myself to try and get rid of this feeling over my shoulders.

"Hey, Kokichi," Shuichi said making me bring my eyes up to his.

"It's ok if that's all you are comfortable eating. Don't try to make yourself eat too much. I don't want you to feel bad ok?" He said putting his hands on top of mine making the shaking lessen.

"Ok, thank you, Shuichi," I said quietly putting my head down while he cleaned up my spot.

Why can't this be easier?

-I have been working on a Saiouma Manga and the sketch is already done. I'm not saying it is going to be good... Anything I do isn't the best or very good at all. I'm just saying if I don't update over the weekend then it's because I'm working on that... Sorry. Thanks for reading!-

-ShuichiOuma010-