Nightmares -Saiouma/Oumasai-

-69-

"What are you thinking about eating today?" Shuichi asked me while he put his hand on his chin. We walked into the kitchen, where Maki was already waiting for the both of us.

"I think that some french toast sounds good!" I said with a smile. I remembered the rare occasions that my mother remembered my birthday, she would always make us french toast. So, it soon became my favorite meal for breakfast. When you have the bread cut it's really easy to make them, you only have to make a mixture of eggs and milk, soak the bread in the mixture, and then start frying the bread. I love putting things on top of it like strawberries or blueberries with powdered sugar. It tastes so heavenly.

"That does sound good," Shuichi said, giving me a smile. I think it's because of the fact that I gave him something to make, instead of being afraid to talk about eating at all. Sure I still hate eating, but food is good, and I like the taste of food, just not the idea of it going into my body and becoming fat...but now I see how much better I feel with food in my stomach, even if the anxiety made me a little sick at first, eventually I got used to it and it gives me more energy throughout the day. I mean, aside from being able to spend almost every moment I'm awake or even when I'm asleep with the one I love more than anything. That makes it all worth it.

I mean before all of this I remember having a sense of determination that kept me going. Even if I didn't have a set goal in mind it would still be there pushing me forward no matter what. I resented it for most of my life...but as I have been with Shuichi and being friends with Maki and some of the others, it has helped to show me that me being here is worth it. Me breathing and being alive has made us able to be in this moment now, all of us together.

They started working while my mind wondered. I always seem to go too deeply into things, sometimes. I definitely don't do it more than my beloved emo detective Shuichi! His name made me smile. Just hearing his name, even if it's only in my thoughts and in my own head, it makes me feel happy. Real happiness, something I haven't felt in a long time...but I blame myself for that. Because I have been lying for my entire life, letting others make me into the liar I am today. I let them do that to me...and this is what happened because of it, but at least now I can work on myself with the people who are true friends and accept me. The people who accept me even when I don't make sense, when I'm letting my lies take over, and when I lie to them in general.

Shuichi being an accepting boyfriend is surprising to me. Not the accepting part...but the part about him being my boyfriend, wait, my boyfriend. Shuichi has been the most impactful person on me ever since I have met him, which I believe was at the beginning of this killing game. Maki on the other hand is supporting from the sidelines and honestly it makes me happy that even Maki, someone who wanted to kill me, now is someone I would consider a friend. Granted, people I consider my friends I treat them as a normal person would treat acquaintances.

But overall, they are all helping me in their own ways, even if it's Kaito being a dumbass and saying stupid shit or something...it still motivates me to become more patient with instances like that.

"Shu!" I said looking back over at Shuichi. He looked over at me after he finished helping Maki complete the plates. He was moving to wash the dishes and he looked at me with the dazzling gaze he always gives me. Like I'm the only person that matters in the room, like I'm the only one he sees, sure it isn't like the one he gave me when we confessed to each other, but it's just as dazzling.

"Yes Kichi," He asked slowly looking back at the dishes. I walked over so I was standing next to him once more.

"I want to help you with the dishes this time!" I said with one of my smiles. He blinked once, I could tell he was surprised because of the words I said to him.

"Yeah, um, the dishes are over there just wash them so I can rinse and dry them." He said before he went back to cleaning. I rolled my sleeves up not worrying too much about showing my scars, because Maki left the room a while ago with her and Kaito's plates.

I find the way he does dishes pretty peculiar. He organizes them on the counter space besides the sink. Then in one of the sinks he scrubs them clean before rinsing and drying them on the other side of the counter. Sure this was probably a better way of getting them done, but I just find it interesting. Another one of his small quirks that make him so unique.

I scrubbed the dishes as he said and then moved them into his sink where he dried them off and set them aside to put away later. "So, Shu, do you enjoy cleaning?" I asked him before helping him to put them away--before I realized I was too short to reach the cupboards...

"I wouldn't say I enjoy it more than anyone else, but I do like it," He said grabbing our plates while I rolled my sleeves down. I moved away from the counter, moving closer to him.

"That's nice Shu, I like how people usually don't bother me when I'm cleaning~," I said gently poking his cheek. He rolled his eyes and looked away making me playfully frown in the process.

"Yeah, I guess so," He said with a small smile. It wasn't his usual smile that he always wore when talking to others, but more of an embarrassed smile. Like where your cheeks are red and you sheepishly grin trying to hide the fact that you are flustered.

"Well, I think that's way nice if you like it!" I said honestly. He scoffed a bit, making me giggle a bit.

"You really think it's nice that I 'like' cleaning?" He asked putting emphasis on the word like. I smiled at him with an innocent look in my eyes.

"Yes, I really do! You would make the perfect husband someday!" I said with a smile letting my eyes sparkle. I do this to really put emphasis on how much it amazes me. And I would love someone who would do the dishes after we cook a meal for dinner on a late night. I would help them with the cleaning, but I didn't hear him complain about it, which is exactly what I love about him! Sure tasks small and tedious as this makes it seem stupid or dumb to do...but after you finish you are done with it for the day, and complaining about it won't make it go any faster.

"H-Husband?!" He gasped making some of the others in the room turn to face him. This just made the blush on his face increase which made me smile. I sat down with him at the table as he quickly placed the plates in front of the both of us.

"Yes, my beloved, a husband~ To yours truly~" I said with another smirk. I leaned against him trying to tease him farther. I didn't expect him to get so flustered over something I was joking about. But now that he is~ I'm going to make the most of it~

"B-but we haven't even been together for more than a month, and then there is all the money for the wedding and moving in--" I cut him off before he could go any farther with his constant worries.

"I'm just kidding Shumai! I mean I didn't mean to make you think that I want to rush things~ Nishishi~" I said with my signature laugh. He covered his face with his hand to hide his blush as his eyes looked over to the side.

"I mean...I wouldn't mind being together as husbands..." He whispered. I barely caught what he said which made me blush before I contained my embarrassment.

"Well, why don't we eat so we can go on that date later my beloved?" I asked in a rhetorical question. He just nodded his head before he started eating. After a moment or so passed while we ate in silence, the others went back to their own conversations.

-Today I was able to get some good study tips for my math test! And hopefully I will be able to understand it all well before friday!! Also, happy birthday to my beloved Hana-san!! I wish you a good rest of your day and a good day for the next day to come and all the days to come in your future!! Thank you all so much for reading!!-

-ShuichiOuma010-