So Close (a James Hetfield story)

Chapter 42

We landed in Toronto a few hours later and hastily checked into the hotel—me with my own room—before heading to the stadium for the band's soundcheck. I sat on a stool near the drumkit, shooting the breeze with the guys and crew, laughing, heckling James when he flubbed some lyrics, and generally forgetting for a moment how much my life had taken another crazy turn just a handful of hours earlier. I felt free, freer than I had in a long time, and it felt amazing. I knew I had a lot still to figure out, but I let it go for a little while and just reveled in the feeling of happiness and Jamie.

Jamie

I looked over at where he stood down at the front of the stage singing to an imaginary crowd, and my stomach tightened and pulse sped up immediately. That moment on the plane when he'd been close to kissing me, had left me shaken and incredibly turned on ever since. The look in his eyes, the feel of his hands on me, the desire in his voice—

"Jesus, calm down girl, you're not a fuckin' teenager," I scolded myself under my breath. "He's just a man..." My voice trailed off then as I looked him over, my eyes skimming over his body. "An insanely hot and sexy man..."

Just then, he looked back over his shoulder at me and winked. I smiled weakly and hid my discomfort by taking a long swig from the bottle of water perched on an empty stool next to me. 

"Stay strong Lei, stay strong," I muttered determinedly as I set the bottle down.

Just then, the guys ended the song. The sun was beating down and Jamie lifted the bottom of his t-shirt up to wipe off his face, leaving his stomach and chest bare to my stare. I didn't even try and hide it as I drank in my fill of him.

"You gotta little drool there on the corner of yer lip Lei," came Lars' smug voice from behind me.

"Shut it," I mumbled gruffly.

He chuckled at my ill humor, but the drummer wisely kept any other comments to himself. 

James bounded up then, his shirt, thankfully, back in place. "What'd you think, how'd we sound?"

"So good!" I assured him. "You're gonna kick Toronto's ass tomorrow."

He grinned wide at my words and then nodded gratefully as I handed him my bottle of water. He drank long and deep, and I found myself mesmerized again by the sheer potency of this man.

"Close yer mouth Lei."

"Lars!" I whirled around on the little fucker, but he'd already scampered off, his pleased-with-himself laughter ringing in my ears. Turning back, James was looking at me in confusion and I plastered a smile on my face. "So," I piped up before he could ask me what his bandmate had said to get me so flustered, "how's it feel to not have your guitar out there? I imagine kinda strange huh?"

James looked down at his bandage encased left hand and stretched and flexed his fingers before answering. "Yeah, real strange. My guitar gives me something to do, without it I feel a little lost." He gave me a rueful smile. "I never know what to do with my hands."

"I could teach you some of my stage moves." I jumped up and did an exaggerated version of a couple dance moves that I regularly employed while singing backup, and James burst out laughing, the rich deep sound setting off a tingling throughout my body.

"I'm pretty sure if I did that," James was trying to talk while laughing, "I'd end up hurtin' myself worse than almost burnin' my damn arm off!"

An image popped into my head of Jamie in one of my skimpy costumes, all arms and legs while trying to perform my routine, and I started laughing too. He sat down in the empty spot next to me as we tried to catch our breath.