Chapter 30

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Jungkook

Almost 8 months later.....

It's almost time to celebrate our baby boy's first birthday. I can't believe time has gone by so quickly. The joy that Seojoonie has brought into our lives, it's immeasurable. From his cute baby talk to his super speed crawling around the house, Seojoon keeps us on our toes daily.

My husband has been feeling the effects of it the most as he spends most of his time with him. In the past year, Jimin has reduced his own workload immensely to accomodate our baby. He barely ever comes into the office, except when he's needed neither does he take any business trips. I've been happy to shoulder his share of the work with Hoseok. Seeing him with Seojoon makes my heart happy.

But there's still a void in our life that I think will never be completely filled without our Jinnie. Thinking about him, always brings tears to my eyes. When he left us, he took something from each of us that can never be replaced. He took my heart and left a piece of his behind, our son, Seojoon.

I searched for him like crazy for about two months straight. I never got a clue as to where he went. He never withdrew any of the money that Jimin had transferred into his account. We never found any tags on his passport neither did he take ownership of the property that we had purchased for him in Singapore, where our permanent residence is.

There was no trace of him in Korea either. I had a private investigator comb places from his past but he never uncovered a thing about Jinnie. It was as though he never existed. I miss him every day. When I look into our son's eyes, I see him. He's never left my mind for even a day.

On my behest, Jimin tried to locate him through a degree course that we had registered him for but their offices were extremely strict and no amount of 'persuasion' on our part, helped to uncover any information through them.

My husband eventually gave up on my obsession and respected Jinnie's need for privacy. I know he missed him too. He had a folder in his phone gallery dedicated to pictures of Jinnie. I would catch him now and then, looking fondly on them, smiling most often, no doubt recalling a sweet memory associated with the pictures.

My memories of my Jinnie remained closed in my heart, not for anyone, except our son. I would talk to Seojoon about his appa when we were alone. Extoll on his beauty, his gorgeous smile and crazy laugh. So many amazing things about his appa that were only for his ears.

It would be a lie if I said that my marriage didn't suffer the after effects of the loss of our Jinnie. We each closed ourselves up in different ways. But Jimin would always remain my best friend, that would never change. It hurt me a lot that he knew, that his place in my heart had been replaced. But somehow I felt, that he didn't hate me for it. He loved me in his own way as I loved him in mine.

The night of our Seojoonie's birthday party, my husband became very ill. He was throwing up violently and complained of stomach cramps. He was rushed to the hospital where they insisted on running umpteen tests on him. He refused and only accepted the pain killers and an IV.

I was boggled with his behaviour until he finally worked up the courage to tell me the truth. A truth that he had known for over two years now.

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Flashback to two years ago

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