X Reader Oneshot Book

[SPN|Dean x Reader] Healing

Written: Friday, 3rd April 2020

[Inspired by the video up top, go check out Living In A Fantasy World on YouTube!]

She looked at him differently after the incident. She sat up a little straighter when he walked in, didn't try to touch him, jumped slightly every time he moved. It broke his heart to see her so afraid. And he was the cause. He remembered what he did, he'd almost killed her, would've too, if Cas and Sam hadn't stepped in.

He looked at her differently too. He was more careful with her, gently approaching her like he would a frightened animal, afraid she would shatter like a porcelain doll if he was too loud. He watched every move she made, and her his, circling each other, afraid to make contact.

She knew the thing that attacked her wasn't him. It was twisted, distorted into someone she didn't recognise, someone who's every stare was filled with hatred, black eyes replacing the green she loved so much. Its voice was harsher, menacing. And it hated her.

Sam had left the two alone in the bunker to go on a supply run, Dean safely locked up while Y/n stayed in her room, reading. She was content for a while, but soon got sick of hearing her boyfriend's yelling from his confines and began to search for her headphones. Unable to find them anywhere, she decided to go see him as a last resort.

The bunker was deathly silent as she waltzed into ask him. "Hey, Dean, have you seen my-" Her heart stopped dead, ice settling in her veins as she stared at the empty chair, breathing shallow. Finally, adrenaline kicked in and she bolted to the closest room, the bathroom, locking herself inside and just barely catching a glimpse of the thing stalking through the corridors.

She ran a heavy hand through her hair, searching desperately for her cell when it hit her. She'd left in her bedroom. She was locked in tight, the small window impossibly high, with no way to call for help. She could only prey that Sam would reach her before Dean could.

A slam on the sturdy wooden door snatched a scream from her lungs as Dean rattled the handle, chuckling to himself. "Come on, Y/n! I know you're in there! Why don't you come out?" Y/n began rattling through the cupboards, looking for something, anything to defend herself, panicked tears beginning to well in her eyes.

After finding nothing, she slid to the floor, nowhere to run and nowhere to hide as she buried her head in her knees, sobbing. "Aww, come on, baby, don't cry! I'll make it quick!" Y/n kept her mouth shut, desperately trying to muffle her sobs with a hand. "Don't worry, I'll get to ya one way or another, doll! Just you wait!"

Dean's footsteps echoed away through the bunker and Y/n sighed, tensed so badly she could feel the tightness in her muscles. She decided to chance it. Her bedroom was only down the hall, she could make it if she sprinted, she could call Sam.

Quietly as she could, she unlocked the door, tiptoeing down the hallway, listening to Dean digging through the kitchen draws. Suddenly, the kitchen was silent, Y/n heard slow, deliberate footsteps approaching and sprinted. She hurtled through her door, sealing it tight behind her as he slammed his entire weight against it. Thank god for the Men of Letters and their absurdly sturdy doors. She checked the lock before scrambling to her phone, dialling Sam's number with shaking hands as she sat flat against the flat, hidden by her overly large bedside table.

"Pick up, pick up, pick up." She whimpered to herself against the dial tone. Dean laughed maliciously, shaking the door again.

"Calling Sammy, really? And here I thought we were just gonna have a nice little chat!" Y/n shook her head rapidly, curling tighter into herself.

"Y/n? What's up?" Sam's echoey voice from the other end of the line filled her lungs with a sudden rush of air as Dean began to ram his shoulder against the door, rattling it so hard plaster flakes were shaken loose from the ceiling.

"Dean got out. I-I-I don't know how, but he did. He's outside my room, Sam, he's gonna kill me!" Y/n sobbed into the receiver, trying not to drop it as she cried, the banging stilling.

"Ok, Y/n, just hold tight, I'm almost back, just hold on!" Sam shouted and she could hear Baby's engine revving into high gear.

"Ok, Sammy... Please hurry." She whispered and hung up.

The room was deathly silent, as was her attacker outside, and she dared not breathe, staring at the door through teary eyes. Maybe he'd gotten bored? A more focused bang shook the door, the wood splintering just the tiniest bit. Her heart dropped to her feet. He was doing a Shining bit while trying to kill her.

The door groaned with ever impact, shattering piece by piece until she could see Dean's face poking through the gap. "Y/n? Doll? Light of my life. I'm not gonna hurt ya." Another smash, his weapon of choice, a sledgehammer, now visible as Y/n squeezed her eyes shut, trying to become invisible. "You didn't let me finish my sentence." The whole was getting entirely too large for Y/n's liking at this point. "I'm not gonna hurt ya," Black eyes scanned the room, looking for his victim, spotting her socks peeking out from behind the dresser. He chuckled, stepping in through his freshly made hole in her door. "I'm just gonna bash your brains in! I'm gonna bash 'em right the fuck in!" She whimpered, tucked against the wall. Her favourite movie was being played out... and she was Wendy, ripe for the plucking in a room with no windows, it's singular door currently being bashed in by her boyfriend, driven mad.

Y/n screamed as he came into view, standing over her with a sledgehammer, a dark grin overshadowing his features. "Dean, baby, please. I know you're still in there."

"Oh, I'm here all right, doll. Best I've ever been." She whimpered as he reached down and yanked her chin up, making her look at his as his eyes flashed black. Salt invaded Y/n's senses as she wept, shaking her head as much as she could, still trapped in his grasp. "Oh, come on, doll, don't cry. I'll make it quick, just for you. How 'bout that?" He dropped her head, watching gleefully as she buried her head in her knees again, readying herself. "Atta girl." He chuckled, raising the sledgehammer high above his head.

Suddenly, the weapon was wrenched from his grip, Sam holding it as Cas pinned his arms to his sides. "It's over." Cas' eyes glowed a ghostly blue as Dean struggled against him, yelling and cursing, never breaking his grip on the man. "It's over, Dean."

Y/n only looked up once he'd been carted away, Sam's hand coming to rest on her shoulder. "It's over." He pulled her up from where she was crouched, pins and needles striking her joints as she fell into his arms, tears smearing onto his jacket. "You should get some rest, we'll let you know when he's cured, ok?" She nodded wordlessly, refusing to look up at him as she climbed into bed. Sam gave her a last reassuring squeeze before heading for the shattered door.

"Thanks, Sammy." She whispered, cracking a tiny smile at him before he left for the night.

Dean came in a few hours later, drenched in his own sweat and looking guiltily at the floor. Y/n's heart raced, her breathing audible as he kept his distance. Tears pooled in his eyes as they stared at each other across the room, muttering a dozen different apologies. She didn't respond, only staring at him in terror. "I'm so, so sorry, baby." His voice cracked as he left, the blanket that now hung over the gap swinging in some invisible breeze as she lay down, eyes refusing to close.

Many a sleepless night came from that encounter, Dean barely approached her anymore. So, when he found her sitting on the kitchen countertop at two in the morning around a month and a half later, drinking an energy drink, he immediately turned to leave. That was, until Y/n hopped down carefully, socks muffling her tired steps as she maneuvered herself into his arms, her can long forgotten as she wrapped her arms around his torso. He stood motionless for a moment, before embracing her gently, kissing her hairline. "Rough night, baby?" He chuckled. She nodded against his chest, burying herself in that chocolatey voice, soft and warm, nothing like the monster in her nightmares. "I'm sorry I put you through that, Y/n." He muttered. She glanced up and for the first time in what felt like an eternity, they locked eyes.

"I forgive you, Dean."

So, yes, they did look at each other differently after that incident. They were a little quieter, a little gentler and less talkative, but they were healing. They were healing together.