✓the three words • kim seungmin

t h i r t e e n

edited 22aug21

• chapter 13: unbearable pressure, everyday

Someone tapped my shoulder when I'm about to fall asleep. Looking to my side, Jeongin seemed worried, "Are you okay? You seem tired." he asked with his face written concern.

Yes I'm tired. Tired of looking after my twin brothers last night. Yesterday after the dinner my parents got an urgent call from their workplace and headed to Busan at that moment. My twin brothers cried so much and I had to get them to sleep, until past 1 in the morning.

"I'm fine." I removed his hand from my shoulder and looked back at the math exercise the teacher gave us. My head was throbbing a bit and I'm sure I can hold it. In my mind, the only thing that matters is what my twin brother are doing in the house with a temporary babysitter. Those two are too naughty and this is the third babysitter my parents hired. I wonder why they didn't put them in the daycare. It's more easy for us.

"Ms Jung, are you okay?" Ms Kim asked from her desk. I nodded. She must have noticed me massaging my temple. Her question attracted most of the attention in the class.

I continued solving the math problems with and hand on my temples. I didn't know sleeping late could give me this headache. I've been sleeping late for these two days because of studying. I want to at least pass the english test.

I shut my eyes tightly when my vision went blur out of sudden. The dizziness attacked me and I dropped my head on the desk. Ugh this is just for awhile, right?

"Ms Kim, can I bring Hyemi to the infirmary?" I heard someone asks.

"Sure, she looks sick. I'll inform the office."

I raised my head. "It's okay I can manage."

"No. Seungmin hyung will bring you there. You need rest." Jeongin whispered to me. With that, someone pulled me up from the seat and dragged me outside.

"It's just a minor headache." I slowly pulled my hand away from Seungmin's grip and he stopped on his track. I couldn't see his face clearly because of the dizziness but I think I still can proceed for the lessons. I can't miss the English test after this.

"You clearly couldn't write anything just now. And you almost sleep. I think you should rest."

"Yeah, after the test." I said and walked back to the class but he prevented me from doing so. He pulled me by my arm.

"How would you take the test if you're sick?"

"Just write–" before I could finish my sentence he already walked us to the infirmary. I couldn't argue much due to the headache and sleepiness. But I really want to do the test.

Seungmin knocked on the door before a nurse opened it. He then brought me to one of the bed and made me to sit down on it.

Why is he doing this?

"Kim Seungmin from class A-1." he reported himself to the nurse before the nurse asked for my name. After she wrote down our names she disappeared behind the curtains.

"The English test," I muttered, closing my eyes while looking down to my feet. "I need to take it."

"It's just a small test. Don't worry about it."

I'm worrying about it because my parents are hoping for me to pass.

I pursed my lips as a sudden wave of pain hit my head. "Alright, thanks for sending me." I said and laid on the bed, facing to the other side. This headache is killing me. I will never stay up again to study unless if I have to look after my twin brothers.

And I fell asleep before the nurse could give me medicines.

‹›‹›‹›

As I opened my eyes the bright light strikes in. Turning my head to the side, I saw the nurse was writing something on a piece of paper. I got up from the bed.

The headache is gone.

"Ms Jung, are you feeling better?" The nurse asked. I only nodded and looked at my wrist watch.

3.15 pm.

Shit! The English test!

"I can return to my class now, right?" I asked the nurse and she nodded. But before I could walk out she gave me a painkiller and advice me to eat something first. Then the door opened, revealing Jeongin.

"Hyemi, you still need rest." He said.

I shook my head no and pushed him outside the room. Closing the door, I look at him with a hopeless look. "The test."

"What?"

"The English test," I whimpered, tears were beginning to appear. "My parents are expecting me to pass. But–"

"Hey it's okay, just tell them you're sick." He tried to calm me down.

"They won't listen," I clutched my hand on the board pill tighter. "They will see it as an excuse. I've made them disappointed for many times and I need to pass the test."

Jeongin raised his hand to wipe an escaped tear but I beat him on it. He sighed and brought me to the school café. "You need to eat first. Then we'll see if we can ask the teacher about it."

I replied with a nod and bought a chocolate waffle to eat. Jeongin sat in front of me as he took his phone. I'm relieved the pain is gone but now I'm worrying about the test. I can't bare from getting scold again and being teased in front of my cousins. I want to be the last time is the last one.

I drank my water after swallowing the pill when Jeongin said, "Seungmin hyung already asks the teacher. She says you could take the test tomorrow so don't worry."

"Thanks. I'm sorry for being a burden."

"You're not a burden, you're a friend." Jeongin chuckled.

I smiled slightly at his statement. To be honest, I feel more happy and comfortable with my friends than being with my family. My friends are always give me support and could calm me down whenever I'm having a breakdown. They are the best people in my life and I wish I have them as my family.

Don't get me wrong. I love my family but I feel not appreciated when I've done many things but they never see my hardwork. They only know to put pressure on me by studying and looking after my brothers.

And all they know are getting away from home. My siblings need attention from parents too, but I guess it's hard for us to get it.

Why can't it be like other people?

🥀